“Anna, what’s wrong, darling?” Patience tried to rock her, but she seemed oblivious to her comforting.
The sobs came in waves, so much stronger than any other time. Was it because Jonah wasn’t here to help soothe her?
Patience pulled her closer, sitting her up a little to get her attention. “Anna, what’s wrong, honey? What was your dream about this time?” Maybe if Anna talked about it, she could work through the emotions.
Anna’s little shoulders heaved as she struggled to catch her breath. “Ma-ma Na-o-mi.” The words came out as more of a sob than a name, but Patience couldn’t deny what her niece hadsaid. And she’d called herMamaNaomi. Usually, it was just Naomi.
She brushed Anna’s hair from her wet cheek. “I know you miss her, honey. I’m so, so sorry.”
Anna’s sobs shuddered through her, impossible to control even as she spoke again. “And Pa-pa E-ric.”
Pain pierced Patience’s heart as she clutched her niece to her, the girl's heartache palpable in the trembling of her small frame. She had been so focused on attaining her own dreams, her own desires, she’d counted them as stronger than the depth of Anna's attachment to the people who had become her family. Naomi and Eric had given her the love and stability she so desperately needed after the loss of her parents and grandmother. And sweet Mary Ellen had become the little sister Anna had never had.
Patience had taken her away from that.
And for what? So she could chase after her own dreams?
Even as she pictured that little white house in the wide green valley, she couldn’t summon a single thread of desire for it. Not when achieving that picture took her away from Jonah, from the safety in his arms and the way he cherished her.
She’d never felt like she belonged anywhere until she’d met Jonah and gone to his mountain haven. He never made her feel like she had to work harder to be good enough. Even when she was fighting against what he wanted, he supported her. He’d traveled weeks in a wagon over rough mountain roads to help her accomplish what she’d set out to do.
Patience took a deep breath, her decision crystallizing with each heartbeat. "We're not going to leave them, Anna. We're going back with Jonah."
Anna’s sobs slowed. She worked to take a breath, but the sobs only allowed short gasps.
“It’s all right, my love.” Patience murmured into Anna’s hair as she rocked her back and forth. “We’re going back to MamaNaomi and Papa Eric. And Mary Ellen and all the people who love you there.” She didn’t let herself think about what life would look like for Anna when they reached the Coulter ranch. Would she rather live with the people she now considered family? If she did, and if they wanted her…
Of course Eric and Naomi wanted Anna with them. They’d made that clear. Should Patience allow it? If so, then what would she do?
What did Jonah want her to do?
Was she really going to stay at the ranch?
The questions were too many to consider now. The only thing she knew with every part of her being was that they were going back. And they’d better hurry to let Jonah know before he set out. The faint light of dawn was already showing through the window.
Anna's sobs had quieted, but she still clung to Patience, her small body trembling.
Patience brushed a strand of hair from the girl's tear-stained cheeks. "Anna, love. Let’s go tell Jonah we want to ride back to the ranch with him.”
She pulled back, then wiped her sleeve across her face. They needed to dress, both of them. She’d not unpacked, so there was little to stuff into bags.
Within minutes, they’d both changed into trail-worn dresses, and Patience had quickly refastened her own coif and Anna’s braid. Then, she snapped the bags shut and waved Anna toward the door. “Let’s go see Jonah.”
They stepped into the hallway only to find that Jonah’s door was already open.
Patience edged close and peered inside.
The room was empty. The covers had been stretched neatly over the mattress as though no one had slept there in days.
Her chest clamped as her mind scurriedto make sense of this change. Had he left last night? Decided he wanted to be home more than he needed a decent night’s sleep?
Tears burned her eyes, and she squeezed them shut. Why had she refused him when he’d asked if they would return with him?
Why had she come to Fort Benton in the first place?
Why, why had she been so selfish?
A small hand slipped into hers, pulling Patience back from her spinning questions. “Where is he, Aunt Patsy? Did he go to get the horses?”
