Peaceful, yes, but with Lorelei so close to him, his body felt nothing like calm. Were they at a point where he could reach for her hand? She had her fingers clasped in front of her, so that might be awkward.
They arrived at his gelding, and he stroked the animal’s neck. Lorelei moved to the horse’s head, letting him sniff her hands. Domino knew her and lifted his head in pleasure as she scratched his jaw and the flat part between his eyes. “You’re a good fella, aren’t you?” As she cooed the words, the horse’s eyes drooped shut.
Tanner could watch her magic way with animals for hours, but this would be his only moment alone with her. If she didn’t return to the house soon, one of the others would likely come to add a chaperone.
He secured the pouch for White Horse and laid the johnnycakes atop a saddle pack, then turned to Lorelei, doing his best to keep his tone light. “You’re making me jealous of my horse.” He nearly winced at the words. That came out far less chivalrous than it had sounded in his mind.
She gave the animal a final pat, then turned to Tanner with that shy smile she’d worn before. He reached for her hand and tugged her closer.
She came to him and rested her hands on his chest. Did she feel the thunder of his heart?
He placed his hands at her waist, holding her far more loosely than he would have liked. A part of him—a large part—wanted to take her mouth with his now. But the way the moonlight shimmered on her face as she looked up at him ... Her beauty made it hard for him to breathe.
He needed to tell her what she did to him. But would she think he only appreciated this lovely outer packaging? “You’re so beautiful ... it hurts. But not just the outside of you.” He dipped his forehead to rest on hers and secured his hold at her waist. “Though every part of that is remarkably lovely. Even if you hadn’t captured me with your looks, yourheart and your goodness would have caught my attention anywhere.”
Should he say the other that still weighed on him? “I know I’m not good enough for you, but I’m now hoping you won’t realize it.” But that was selfish. He should be encouraging her to use wisdom.
He drew his head back a little. “If you do decide I’m right, though, all you have to—”
She rose up on her toes and pressed her mouth to his, halting his words in a blessed mercy.
twenty-five
Tanner relished the taste of Lorelei, the way she gave of herself and seemed to expect nothing in return.
But of course he gave. He would put his very soul into the kiss if he didn’t know exactly where that would lead.
As it was, he forced the connection to stay gentle, then ended it far before he wanted to. Though his gelding concealed much of them from view of those in the house, he didn’t want her family to worry.
He pulled back enough that he could see her face. The moonlight shimmered off her cheeks, making them appear porcelain. Her eyes were too shadowed to see their emotion, but her lips were red and a little swollen from his own. He’d been gentle, hadn’t he?
Her hands had moved up to his shoulders, and they now gripped him as though she didn’t plan to let him leave. That would be fine with him, if only he wasn’t needed at the fort. Her family might have something to say about it if he stayed much longer. Between Rosemary’s assessing gaze and Riley’s wary look, they intended to protect their little sister.
He softened his hold on her sides. He would protect her too—from himself or anyone else.
“Tanner.” Her voice came out a little hoarse, and she cleared her throat. Her thumb reached up to stroke the edge of his jaw, sending a tremble through him. He should have taken time to shave away the stubble before coming over.
She opened her mouth to speak again, and he forced himself to look in her eyes, not down to her lips. “I realized something. But before I tell you, I need you to promise you’ll stop saying you’re not good enough.”
He wanted to respond, to tell her he was only speaking the truth. But she touched a finger to his lips, halting his speech before he could begin. She was right. It was her turn to say what lay on her heart. He pressed a kiss to her finger.
She moved her hands back to his shoulders. “God hasn’t rejected you. You are good enough exactly the way He made you. Better than good enough—you’re perfect. Exactly the way He wants you.” The corners of her lips twitched. “The man I see, the man I’ve come to know, is strong and good and wise. And so much more. I can’t even list all the things I love about you.”
His heart stalled on that word. Why would she use it so lightly?
Her mouth curved as she must have seen his reaction. “That’s what I realized these past days I’ve been home. Perhaps it’s too soon to say such, but you’ve secured my heart, and I think the Lord wanted me to tell you.”
His mind struggled to keep up with her words, to make sense of them, even as part of him wanted to lift her high and swing her around as he hooted.
Shelovedhim? How could she say that?
He opened his mouth to tell her she shouldn’t, but again she touched his lips with her finger.
“Think before you speak. In fact, don’t answer at all. You’ve no need to respond if you don’t feel the same.”
How could he not feel the same? She was ... perfect. For him, anyway, and every man who met her seemed to agree, even before they got to know her beautiful heart.
But he couldn’t let the two of them move so fast. She needed more time to see all the things she’d clearly missed.
