Dr. Marin shook it and grinned. “I had no idea Sam was dating the elusive Lukas Farren.”
Lukas huffed a laugh. “I shouldn’t be surprised that everyone, even you, has heard of me,”
The doctor shrugged. “Small town. Dr. Cooke will be here momentarily to talk about everything happening today. I just wanted to tell you I’ll be around and when you’re out, I’ll come see you.”
“Thanks, Dr. Marin.”
When he left, there wasn’t a second I was alone with Lukas. I found myself desperate for a hug, to say I love you and hear it back. I wanted to be cuddled up on his couch and watch some movie I picked out and listen to him complain about every character.
“Samuel Karis.” Dr. Cooke beamed as she walked up to my bed. “How are you doing today?”
“I’d rather be anywhere but here, Doc, but all things considered, I actually feel good.”
She pursed her lips. That was the thing that pissed me off the most and no doubt the doctors too. I felt fine. Yet my scans and blood were showing us that I was anything but.
“Do you understand the procedures today?”
“Could you explain them to me?” Lukas implored, and Dr. Cooke glanced from me to Lukas.
“I can. I’m Dr. Cooke, by the way.”
“Lukas, Sam’s boyfriend. I just want to know what will be going on.”
She went right into her jargon. Percutaneous biopsies, endoscopy, blah blah. I didn’t listen, just watched Lukas. It was by far my favorite thing to do in the world. He asked so manyquestions, was laser focused. The man was dedicated to every facet of this conversation. Without missing a step, he gripped my hand when I reached for him, his words never slipping.
“It will take a few hours, so you can go to the family waiting room. When you enter, there will be a large desk with receptionists there. Simply give them your name and cell phone number. As soon as Sam is in recovery, they will call you and take you to see him.”
“He’s going right now?”
She shook her head, “In a few.”
“Okay, thank you, Doctor.”
She giggled. “I like him, Sam,” she said as she pulled the curtain and left.
We were alone. I tugged Lukas’s hand and he immediately sat on the bed. “What is it?”
“I…I know you can’t understand all this.”
His brows dipped. “No, I do. Dr. Cooke coherently explained what they’d be doing.”
I snorted. “That’s not what I meant.” I cupped his face with my other hand, which was a pain with the IV. “I don’t think you’re crazy, Lukas. I want you to know I believe you and all you offered me. I just…”
“You don’t have to explain anything to me, Sam.”
“No, I do. Please, they’ll be here any second, and I need to say this.”
“Okay.”
“I love you, Lukas. I’ve never been in love before. It’s quite awful.”
I was glad when he chuckled. “The worst.”
“I got to thinking the other night that not dying would mean not being with my parents again. I’d probably never grow old, but then I thought about watching Natalie, Ben, Emily, Maggie…they would, and I’d watch them die and never ever be with them.”
“It’s about faith? Heaven, yes?”
“Sort of. When my folks died, I was pissed. They only saw me healthy for one damn year, and I abandoned my faith. What kind of God does this, you know?”
