Connor: Why are you making my sister blush, hm? Are you sending dick pics the day after she dumped that deadbeat asshole?
Connor: Apparently I wasn’t supposed to tell you that she blushed. Fine, text my sister, I see what your game is Benson.
Noah: I literally just said hi, chill out.
The timer on the oven lets me know my pizza is ready. Once I put it on a plate, I move towards the dining room table. As I take my first bite, I close my eyes. I imagine what it would be like to share pizza with Audrey in my new house and I feel truly at peace for the first time all day.
Eleven: Audrey
Call If You Need Me - Vance Joy
Connor rented an apartment for me before he went back to Missouri and I didn’t argue, especially when he said it's only month-to-month. I didn’t fight it, mainly because it gave me a place to store my stuff. But I didn't unpack after he left. I didn’t make it a home. Instead, on my first night in the apartment, I watchedSafe Havenandcried, mourning seven years with the wrong guy.
I let days turn into weeks, overthinking every memory, every moment—beating myself up for all the things I lost out on, for staying with someone that was wrong for me. Did I put up with him out of fear? Was I just settling? I can’t quite figure out why I stuck it out for so long.
Selena attempts to cheer me up by inviting me for girls' nights. Even all of my mutual friends with Paul are "Team Audrey," offering me support too. I just can't help feeling like I've woken up from a nightmare but I don't know how to rewrite history.
The sadness stemming from Paul cheating on me is chipping away day by day, especially with Noah checking in every few days.
Now, every time my phone pings I’m hoping it’s him. He doesn’t talk about Paul, or ask me to open up, but the other day he texted me to say I can call him if I ever need him. I thanked him, laughing it off, but part of me wanted to dial his number right away to hear his voice.
To feel like I’m home again.
I don’t know how to face him, because now I have nothing to hide behind, nothing to hold me back from chasing what I really wanted all along.
Connor snagged tickets to the opening game this upcoming Saturday for me, Selena, and Fiona. I’ve been giving him the run around on whether I'll actually come or not.
I want to go and support him. But I also know if I see Connor and Noah in action again it’ll feel like old times, and I don’t know if I can wrap my head around that feeling yet.
I’ve been avoiding the subject with Connor and I know he’s starting to get annoyed, he sent me numerous texts today while I was at work. The minute I get through my front door his texts start up again.
A knock sounds at my door as I’m making dinner. I half expect Connor to barge in, but after I ignore the first knock there isn’t a follow up one.
Maybe it was the wrong apartment?
Connor: ARE YOU COMING?
Connor: Pretty please, sissy dearest.
Connor: You can ignore my texts all you want but you can’t ignore the package someone sent you. It’s outside your door!
Seriously?
I open my front door to find a giant box. Placing it on the coffee table, I sigh.What did he send me now?
Ripping open the box, I pull out a Royals jersey; but instead ofMendez 92on the back it saysBenson 21.
Wait, did Noah send this?
I read the shipping label and sure enough it’s from Noah Benson.
I run my hand over the jersey. His name looks so good against the blue fabric and a part of me is tempted to put it on right now and never take it off.
A note in the box stares at me.Noah’s handwriting.
He’s desperate, Auddie. Don’t make us miss our opening game. It’s our first game on the same team in a long time. We’ll fly out there, you know we will. I’ll need my good luck charm back. Ineverplay a game without it.
Beside the note sits the crocheted lucky charm that I made for him in sixth grade.
