Jade’s brain was two steps behind. She sat, frowning, processing what she was hearing. Finally, the pieces fell into place, her mouth dropping open as she realized just what Raya was telling her.
“You knew?” she half-whispered.
Raya shifted uncomfortably.
“I didn’t think it was real, okay? I thought he was just trying to get some attention, to look cool. Honest to god. It was a moment. We were hanging out and chatting and he was being a dick. I didn’t know he meant it. How could I?” Raya was talking around in circles, trying to convince herself more than anyone.
Jade got it. Kids at school talked shit all the time. Jesus, if any adults saw their social media posts, half of them would have been locked away by now. It was all out there; a whole secret, tawdry world open to those media-savvy enough to dig for it and young enough to care, buried in an endless stream of pouting snaps and flexed biceps. Jade knew that as well as anyone. She lived for it.
“So, what’s the problem?” Jade asked, confused. “You didn’t believe him, so big deal.”
Raya gave a short, sharp laugh.
“Here’s the problem. I thought he was full of shit. But then…when halftime was up…I couldn’t go back in the gym. Some instinct told me not to. It’s like, somehow, Iknew…so I just left. My friends were still inside. Ana was inside…and I just left. I didn’t text or warn anyone.I just left them.I drove to the mall and hung out. For the longest time, I thought I was being stupid. I was so mad at myself for being pathetic, I was embarrassed, right up until I heard the sirens.”
Raya stood up abruptly and walked over to the window. She stared out, arms folded across her chest.
“I’ve been telling myself for over a year now that it wasn’t my fault—that I couldn’t have known Karl really meant all that bullshit.” Raya turned and for the first time faced Jade, looking her squarely in the eyes. “But actions speak louder than words, right? If I’d trusted my instincts, I could have stopped the whole thing. Danny and Maia would be alive…”
Raya rubbed at her eyes vigorously, her hand coming away black, smudged with eyeliner and dirt.
“So, yeah, Jade. What you said about karma…I agree. Maybe we didn’t light the match then or now, but weareguilty. Both of us. If I’d been a better person, no one would have died that day. You might have been the one to push Karl over the edge by being a complete bitch.”Jade mumbled a weak protest, but Raya continued. “The thing is, Jade, maybe this is karma, the universe avenging itself on us weak, stupid fools. Maybe we do deserve to ride the red truck. Fuck it.”
Raya looked down at her feet and kicked angrily at the floor. Jade crumpled up her nose. Well, that hadn’t helped. Wasn’t Raya meant to make her feel better?
A slow clapping made them both jump.
“Well done,” said a low voice. Ellis was standing in the doorway.
Instantly Jade felt unnerved. There was something wild about his expression, something she hadn’t seen before. He seemed almost…predatory. Like a tiger looking for an easy kill.
“Nice story.” Ellis walked forward slowly. He had one hand behind his back, hidden from view. “Makes perfect sense. Running away. Hiding. Cowardice. All classic Raya Mori.”
Raya must have sensed the danger. She was watching Ellis nervously.
“Cathartic, isn’t it? Confessing your sins. Admitting your guilt,” Ellis said.
“Yeah, you should try it sometime, dickhead,” Raya shot back.
Ellis was staying close to the door, close enough that he could use his superior speed to cut her off if she tried to leave.
Jade was too nervous to speak. Even in her messed-up state she could tell this was not going to end well. Ellis was searching for a new victim, and their secret pact must have expired now that Jax was gone. No more two-for-one deal. She started to feel very small, squeezing herself against the counter as though it could swallow her up and offer some protection.
Raya straightened up, standing as tall as her build allowed, her hands balled into tight fists.
“Where are the others?” Ellis said coldly.
“They’re searching the outbuildings. I was just going to go and help them.” There was a slight waver in her voice.
“Sure.”
Raya took a tentative step towards the door. Ellis didn’t move from the doorway. He just stood there, both hands behind his back now.
Raya took another step, watching Ellis closely. He turned almost infinitesimally as though to let her pass; his back came into Jade’s view for the first time. She gasped. In his right hand, he was gripping a plastic zip tie. This was not good. Not good at all. Her instincts were right. Ellis meant trouble.
Raya took her chance. She stepped forward and grabbed the rusty old door handle, pushing down hard on it. The door creaked open. She backed into the open doorway, still facing Ellis. Her relief was palpable and premature.
“Before you go, I just want to say thank you,” Ellis said. His back was now fully turned towards Jade. She could see his fingers playing with the zip tie.
