Chapter 4
Two Days Later: Wednesday
Levi felt pretty good about himself. He'd spent the whole of yesterday talking to Mack and figuring out different aspects of their relationship. It had been two days since he officially became Mack's boyfriend and he couldn't have been happier. Now all he had to do was tell Tam. But he was sure that would go well. He had a feeling that Tam and Casen had been trying to push them together, but he wasn't going to call either of them on that fact, in case they thought he was ungrateful.
Right now, Mack was hanging out with Casen and he felt kind of lost. There was still so much they had to talk about and they'd already wasted years. He didn't want to waste another second.
Levi was pretending to watch a film, while staring at the ceiling, when the sound of a door closing caught his attention. If such a thing was possible, he stared at his bedroom door long enough to burn a hole through it. As soon as he saw the handle moving, he turned back to the TV, so that it wouldn't look like he'd been waiting eagerly for Mack to get back. Even though he had.
As he'd hoped, the door opened and his boyfriend walked in, wearing joggers and a thick jumper. He crossed to the bed, so Levi shuffled over to make room for him, trying not to make a show of his being there. He couldn't help but smile, though. It felt good to know that his first act after getting home from spending time with Casen was to change and then come looking for him.
Mack climbed on and lay on his back beside him, only for his head to slowly roll onto his shoulder.
Levi closed his eyes as he smelled the citrus shampoo in his hair; he'd gone for a shower after getting home. “Are you okay?” he asked quietly, sensing something was wrong, but not able to tell what without looking into Mack's expressive eyes.
Mack reached down to hold his hand. “This is why I don't have relationships,” he replied, in his own roundabout way. “I warned you that I'd be like this. I'm possessive, clingy and I can't control my temper,” he apologised, though he wasn't sure it was necessary. Or what he was apologising for.
Then he remembered; Mack's tone had been clipped when Levi asked where he and Casen were going. It was pure curiosity on his part, but he wondered if Mack had found the question stifling or perhaps possessive in some way? As though he had to answer to Levi before leaving their apartment?
He never wanted him to feel that way.
“I know and I love that about you. I didn't help; I was thoughtless. I didn't realise how it sounded, when I asked you. I should have known it came out all 'jealous boyfriend', which was wrong and completely unjustified.” Levi made his own apology and hoped it was good enough. Neither of them were good at this, but they were trying and that was the important part. “You were right, the other night. You've made every move forward in this relationship and I've let you,” he admitted, glad to feel Mack turning to snuggle in.
“There's something I didn't tell you,” he claimed, as Levi wrapped his arms around him. “This is the only thing that Casen and I are the same in,” he whispered, as if that was such a terrible secret to have kept.
“What?”
“Relationships. We want the same thing, we act the same way. That's why I don't have them. I hate being like this,” he confessed, sounding far too guilty for his liking.
Levi held Mack tighter. He had nothing to feel guilty about. So he'd blown a fuse and got mad; so what? Levi did it all the time.
“I'm sorry. I nearly outed us to Casen,” Mack whispered.
He couldn't help but laugh. “That's okay. I tried to call Tam just before you got back, but he didn't pick up,” Levi explained, hoping that it would help him understand. He felt guilty for never telling Tam about those few crushes he'd had on guys before. Tam was his best friend and he should have told him.
“He's not answering his phone because Casen went home early. I went for a run, before coming back. I guess he probably had time to get home, by then. Though, I wouldn't answer my phone either, if I were them,” Mack answered, surprising him.
“Why?”
“Because they're christening the new extension. I wouldn't want to be interrupted by my phone either,” he admitted, with a warmth that let Levi know he was calm now and open to discussing anything they still had to cover.
“Huh. Tam never told me.”
“Tam doesn't know.” Mack laughed, lifting his head to look up at him. “I helped Casen plan a big romantic dinner; he was like a jitterbug. He was fussing about stupid things, like what clothes to wear.” He smiled, winking at him in his usual cheeky way.
Levi considered that information. “Well, I'm sure Tam will be happy, whether they have sex or not. All he wanted was to give Casen a real library,” he said, allowing himself to share that secret with his boyfriend. He had to stop thinking of them as best friends and get real. Mack was his boyfriend and he was Mack's.
Mack nodded and put his head down on his shoulder again. “Thank you. For not being angry with me.”
“You know, you're different to before,” he noticed, though it wasn't a brand new revelation.
Mack shrugged, almost shyly.
“When was the last time you had a relationship like this?” Levi asked, trying to figure out a few things.
“Never,” he said.
“Any relationship?”
