“Distance. Yes.” That was how the words came out to him—distant.
Cela crumpled a little. “I’m sorry I tried to leave without saying goodbye. I just couldn’t imagine how we were going to have this conversation, and I thought?—”
“That it would be easier if I woke up to find you and the kids gone with no explanation?”
Her temper flared. “We’ve tried it your way. Your friends haven’t found a cure. So let’s try my way for a while.”
Almost as an inverse to Cela’s anger, Tyr felt his own slip away. She really had gone from one prison to another, and he was not going to be her jailer.
“We’ll try it,” he said. “Can I help you carry anything?”
It was reassuring, to an extent, that she seemed to be leaving most of her things here, including things he knewshe valued—books, games, DVDs. While Cela ran into the house to grab a few items from the bathroom, Gaby turned to Tyr. She didn’t seem bothered by his nearly naked state, covered only with a blanket; but then, she was used to shifters.
“It really will be a nice place for her,” she said quietly. “We have an empty mother-in-law cottage where my mom lived before she married her favorite bingo partner and moved to Florida. I think it’ll work out well, because I can take Cela to work with me, and we can trade off between our child care and hers.”
Tyr nodded wordlessly.
“I want you to know,” Gaby added. “Cela’s my friend, and you and I didn’t really get off on the right foot, because Paula is my friend too. But Derek and I—and Ben, and even Paula and Dan—we’re all in your corner. I’m sorry things aren’t working out for you two right now, but we really want to help you get things to work, if we can.”
Fortunately Cela came back just then, before he had to decide whether to lie (“Of course we can fix it”) or just make polite noises. Cela said goodbye, hovering near him in the way they both seemed to have accepted was the closest thing they could get to an embrace. Tyr kissed both of the twins goodbye.
And then Cela drove out of his life in Gaby’s car, leaving him standing wrapped in a blanket.
Tyr stood there for a short while, as a lot of different thoughts bouncing around in his head began to coalesce into one overriding urge:fix this.
He went into the house and got dressed mechanically. The plan was there, at the back of his mind. It was just that Cela had always said no. But with Cela growing more distant?—
—Distance—
.... and he couldn’t blame her, he could see no reason not to try playing the one hole card he had left.
Once the decision was made, doubt fell away. He went swiftly around the house, closing things up, checking for loose ends. The greenhouse would be all right for a few days, with the cool, damp weather, and if he was gone more than a few days ... it meant he couldn’t come back anyway. He wished he’d had time to change his will and leave Cela the house and property, or at least some of it; right now it was in trust for the kids?—
The kids. Austin and Lissy.
Tyr closed his eyes. For a moment he felt as if he was being pulled agonizingly in two directions. He’d already left his older kids once, for reasons beyond his control, but he knew that he had come close to destroying his relationship with them forever. Now he was leaving again. His thought had been to go immediately, before he could have doubts; no questions, no delays. If this worked, it wouldn’t matter; if it didn’t .... it also didn’t matter.
But then he thought of how he would have felt if Cela had left, as she’d meant to, with no explanations or goodbyes.
He took out his phone, stared at it for a minute, and called Paula.
When she answered, he had confirmation that her voice had lost its pull on him. He had loved her once, and that ghost would always be there, but Cela now sang in his soul. “Are Austin and Lissy around?” he asked. “Can I talk to them?”
“It’s early,” Paula said, and Tyr, startled, looked at the clock. He hadn’t realized how early it was. It seemed as if a hundred years had passed since Cela had left. “But Austin’s up for his part-time job, and I think I heard Lissy moving around too. Is it important?”
Yes. No. It might be the most important conversation heever had with them, but he didn’t want to panic her, or alert anyone to what he was planning in time to be stopped. “Not really, but I’d like to talk to Austin for a minute.”
He heard Paula call Austin’s name, and a moment later his oldest son was on the phone. “Hi, Dad,” Austin said, with his voice cracking in that endearing adolescent way. Tyr’s throat tightened.
“Hi, son. I just wanted to ask how your summer job is going.”
“What,now?” Austin said. “We’re babysitting for you guys this weekend. You could ask me then.”
“Sometimes a guy just wants to talk to his son, you know?”
Austin huffed an exasperated sigh. There was no drama like teen drama. But they chatted about it for a bit, and at the end, Tyr said, “I love you, son. Take care of your sister. I’d like to talk to her too, if she’s around.”
“What’s up with you today?” Austin asked suspiciously. “Are you dying or something?”
