10
If Iris had ever hadto guess what she would be doing the day after meeting her fated mate—the day after meeting her Council-assigned match—and just a couple hours after tearfully confessing her whole rebellious, painful history to him ....
Well, nobody would have ever asked her to guess that. But even if they had, she still wouldn’t have landed on “making the Earl Grey chocolate cake from herStar Trekcookbook.”
It actually needed the same powdered sugar she’d thrown out in a fit of extremism, right after she’d decided to devote herself to a life thatwouldn’thave ruined her face. She and Keith had bought a replacement bag on their way back to the cottage, and the store clerk had given them a suspicious look, like he was wondering if they really had a good enough reason to buy it. Iris had done her best to ignore it.
She liked the heft of the bag of sugar. It felt like it promised a lot of sweetness to come.
Was she really going to give up on trying to live up to the Council’s standards?
I’d rather live up to Keith’s standards, she thought, cracking an egg into her mixing bowl.I’d rather live up to mine. But it’s easy to think that when it’s just the two of us. It’s going to be a lot harder to stand by that decision tonight, with Seraphina and Blake on the other side of the table. I know whatthey’dsay I should do.
She reminded herself that technically she could have it both ways, even the inherent dishonesty of it nagged at her. There was no reason she couldn’t stick to the plan she’d already made: follow the conventions while she was here, while her behavior could rebound on her family, and then embrace her freedom once she was away from home. That had never been an option before Keith, but, incredibly, it was now.
“I was thinking about tonight,” she said.
Keith marked his place in the cookbook with one finger. He’d avidly read his way through theStar Trek: The Next Generationsection, where the Earl Grey chocolate cake recipe came from, and now he’d moved on toDeep Space Nine. He looked fascinated.
When he looked at her, with a smudge of chocolate already on her apron and powdered sugar lightly dusting her bare arms, he lookedmorethan fascinated. Never mind the cake; he looked at her like she was the real dessert.
Iris felt an answering fire kindling in her, making it hard for her to concentrate on their dinner plans. She knew it wasn’t the preheating oven that made it feel like the air in her little kitchen was shimmering in the heat.
“I still want to play it safe tonight,” she made herself say. “If that’s okay. I don’t want my family to worry about me, or to worry that I’m going to mess things up for them again.”
“Then I’ll play it safe too.”
“You don’t mind sort of ... stifling the real you?”
Why are you asking him to do something that’s been so awful for you?her unicorn said, stamping its hooves.
You don’t understand how complicated the human side of this is, Iris told it.
Keith did, though. He didn’t look like he thought she’d asked for too much. In fact, one side of his mouth quirked.
“You aren’t the only one who’s binged a bunch of human movies and TV. As far as I can tell from that, being on your best behavior around your—ah—girlfriend’s family is pretty standard. I don’t have any problem playing model tribute for a night. All I care about is that I don’t have to be that person with you.”
“No. Never.” She moved everything over to the mixer. “You know, I didn’t actually get the chance to tell you why I gave up carpentry. I kind of stopped things short by crying all over you. You can probably guess what it was, though.”
“Might feel good to talk about it anyway,” Keith said offhandedly, like he hadn’t already spent most of today listening to her feelings and letting her get his shirt all damp.
I’m in love with him, Iris thought.
The realization didn’t surprise her. They were shifters, and they were mates. On some level, they’d fallen in love the moment their eyes had met. Her unicorn had recognized that even if she hadn’t.
But that moment had been dizzying and terrifying, because she hadn’t known who he was, and—worse—she hadn’t really known whoshewas, either. She’d felt split in two.
She knew it was early, and she knew that it was probably a mistake to feel like he’d already solved all her problems just by sweeping her off her feet. But after months of feeling like she couldn’t breathe, she was going to enjoy this bubble while it lasted.
Even if he hadn’t fixed everything for good, he’d made it so much better. It was like she’d been drowning and he’d given her mouth-to-mouth.
Shewishedhe’d given her mouth-to-mouth.
And deep down, that was why she loved him, not just because her heart had leapt when they’d first met. She loved his eyes and his frown and his smile and how he looked when he was concentrating. She loved how dorkily, unapologetically interested in things he was, even when those things were pet fish andStar Trekcookbooks. She loved his kindness and his awkwardness. His hands. His mouth. All of him.
Then why, her unicorn demanded,are you asking him to hide himself?
