Emily
Depends.
Atlas
Depends on what?
Emily
What your plans for the date are.
Atlas
I was thinking we could go to dinner at around 6:30pm.
Emily
Sure.
Even though he most likely wouldn’t show, I still wanted to know what he’d say. I put my phone back in my pocket and speed walk the rest of the way home. I smelled like stale coffee and sweat. I could really use a shower. Entering my apartment, I kick off my shoes, heading straight for the bathroom.
As I wait for the water to reach boiling level, I strip off my clothes. I can’t help but glance at myself in the mirror. I wouldn’t say I was ugly, just average looking. I was far from looking like a model.
My stomach was soft and I had stretch marks. My walnut brown hairwas long at the moment. It sits at the middle of my back until the next time I feel manic and chop it short again. I was usually fine with that. My thighs always jiggle a little when I walk. I always try to be confident in my own body though. No matter what anyone else thinks about the way I look, I know the right person will love my body, curves, and stretch marks included. Sometimes the doubt just creeps in for a moment. Something about Atlas is bringing up old fears.
Stepping into the shower, I let the heat of the water take over. I feel my muscles relaxing one by one as the water slips down my back. Something about the hot water is always so relaxing to me. Closing my eyes, I put my head underneath the spray of water, letting everything sink in for a few moments. No matter what happens with Atlas, I couldn’t let it get to me. I refuse to let my obsession with that man be my downfall.
The water starts to run cold and I quickly wash my body before shutting the water off. Wrapping a towel around myself and another in my hair, I walk into my room, putting on the first comfy thing I find. I wasn’t about to get all glammed up for nothing. By the time I get dressed and plop onto the couch it’s five o’clock. I guess I was in the shower a little longer than I thought. I order a pizza while I scroll through movies. Ten minutes later, my pizza is ordered and a random movie is playing. It doesn’t matter, I’m not really watching it.
Instead, I’m reading this new dark romance book I downloaded on my phone yesterday. I end up getting lost in the book. It’s a reverse stalker, which is kind of funny given my actual life at the moment. It’s the reason I downloaded it, if I’m being honest. The female main character in this book makes a way better stalker than me, but that’s not surprising. I’m almost halfway through the book when my doorbell rings. That mustbe my pizza. I slip on my slippers and rush to open the door.
“Oh shit, you actually showed up,” Atlas stood in the doorway dressed in a fitted black dress shirt and matching black dress slacks. He shouldn’t be allowed to look this good. It really was unfair. My eyes drink him in before I remember to look at his face. Oops, oh well. He wears his normal smirk. Of course, he caught me looking, it would be hard not to notice.
“Was I not supposed to? I thought you agreed to go on a date with me tonight.”
I look down at the ground, avoiding eye contact. This is beyond embarrassing. My cheeks heat and I already know they’re probably pink. I didn’t think I’d have to explain to my obsession that I thought he wouldn’t even show up to a date he asked me on. “Yeah, I did. I just figured you would stand me up.”
“What gave you that idea?”
“It wouldn’t be the first time it’s happened to me, but it’s not important.”
He’s quiet. I’m starting to worry he left me standing here by myself. I wouldn’t blame him. I lift my head high enough to see him. He’s angry. I can tell by the flutter of his jaw and the clenching of his fist. Great, the last thing I wanted to do was piss him off. The moment he catches me looking, it’s like a mask slips in place. The anger is gone, and in its place sits a warm smile. What was that? Did I imagine his anger or did he hide it from me?
He shifts, holding out a flower for me to take. I’m not reallya flower person, but this one’s different. This one seems to be made of paper, more specifically, it looks like a book page. My eyes tear up a little as I take it from him. This is probably the most thoughtful gift I’ve ever gotten and that’s sad to say.
“If you don’t want to go out with me, Chaos, you don’t have to. I would never force you to do something you didn’t want to do.”
There was that name again, only this time his voice sounded sullen when he said it. I knew he’d probably keep his word if I said no, but I felt he’d be disappointed if I did. I didn’t want to disappoint him, but I also didn’t want to give him the power to disappoint me either.
“Just forget I said anything, let me put this away and we can go.”
He looks me up and down and smirks. “While I love what you have on right now and I think you look adorable in it, it doesn’t exactly follow the dress code of where I’m taking you for dinner.”
I glanced down to see what the hell he’s talking about and my jaw hit the floor. How did I manage to forget I was only in an oversized t-shirt and fucking cow slippers?! This is the last thing I want this man to see me in, and we’ve had a full ass conversation with me wearing it. I’m mortified. “Really funny, you ass. Were you waiting to make that joke the whole time?”
“I’d never joke about an outfit like that. If I had my way, you’d end the night in a similar outfit, except it’d be my shirt you had on.”
Rolling my eyes, I step aside and motion for him to follow me inside. He chuckles but follows after me. I walk him into the livingroom where the movie is still playing, but I quickly turn it off.
