My head snapped up, catching her gaze, expecting a suppressed smile, a crinkle of her nose as she held back a laugh, but all that met me were her narrowed eyes that lacked any and all humor.
“Funny,” I said, taking another sip of water.She was totally doing a bit.Neither of us wanted marriage.
“Because marrying me is nothing but a joke to you?”Her tone cut through the night like a jagged razor, slicing in awkward places.
I held my hand up.“What is happening here?”
“Forget it.”Her mouth snapped shut, and she stormed toward the cabinet, grabbing a wine glass and a bottle.
I walked to her, taking the glass gently from her hand and placing it on the counter.“I can’t forget it.You’re upset, and I hate when you’re upset.Talk to me.Please.”
“I don’t want to.”
She might as well have smashed the bottle over my head and slammed its broken edges deep into my chest.“Why not?”
“Because there’s no point.”
“There’s always a point.”I tipped her chin up.“Hey.”Her tear-filled eyes met mine, and concern surged through me.“What is going on?”
She inhaled deeply, her eyes slipping shut, her eyelashes brushing against the apples of her cheeks.“Why don’t you want to marry me?”
A flicker of irritation sparked in my chest.I’d never hidden how I felt about marriage.I didn’t understand why she was acting like this was new.And for fucks sake, she agreed with me!
“Neither of us believe in it.I don’t need a piece of paper to tell me I love you.”
“So what?We’re just going to grow old together and call each other boyfriend and girlfriend?”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Eleven years, Wyatt.”She shook her head, lip curling in the way it did when she was trying not to cry.“I love you.God, I love you so much.But I want more than a necklace and speeches about how we don’t need marriage.”
“Marriage doesn’t change anything.”
“It changeseverything.It’s standing up with you and sayingI choose you, not just in private, but out loud.Not just now, but always.”
“You know I already do.”
“Then why can’t you say it in front of everyone else?”
“Why do I have to?Who gives a shit about everyone else?”
“I do.”Her answer was barely a whisper as the brokenness in her gaze pinned me in place.
Standing at an altar and declaring my love for her didn’t make what I felt for her any more real.Why couldn’t she see that?Her family and our friends knew she was everything to me.It’s never been a doubt in anyone’s mind.
“Haven’t I done enough?”I inhaled, thrusting my hands through my hair, grasping for a sense of sanity.“I left everything behind for you.I stayed here instead of chasing my career because I wanted a life with you.You can’t give me this one thing back?”
“I never asked you to give up your dreams, Wyatt.I thought I was enough, but now I want more for us.I want to matter enough to you to change your mind.”
“You’ve always been enough.You’re my whole damn world.I don’t know how else to prove it.”
“Marry me.”The words were an immovable barrier between us.
“I…”
“If you loved me enough, you’d marry me.”Her voice cracked, and my vision of our future blurred for the first time.We had an agreement.For eleven fucking years, she stood by it.Now she was throwing it in my face?
“Don’t do that,” I said.
