“So…tell me what I need to know about you,” I say once he finally gets settled.
“I need you to promise me, swear on your life, that this does not leave the room,” he mumbles, a shakiness to his voice.
“I would hope you’ve realized I’m not that kind of person. We have enough dirt on each other that we could get the other one canceled in a heartbeat. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. This is just between you and me. I swear.”
“Okay. Yeah. It’s just…this is…God, it’s fucking embarrassing.”
I scoot next to him, my legs curled at my side as I tuck my feet under the throw pillows, settling in. A dull ache weighs heavily in my chest, my actions twisting tightly inside me. I bite my lip, realizing I owe him an olive branch before he spills the rest of his story.
“Listen, I know I can be kind of a bitch sometimes. Okay, most of the time.”
“Kennedy, you’re not a?—”
“Yes. I am. Before you share whatever it is you need to get out, I want to apologize. I had a lot of preconceived notions about you. I thought you were selfish and conceited, and…I don’t say this often, but I was wrong.” I grab his hand, pulling it into my lap, the roughness surprisingly soothing as I choke out my words. “I was a bitch for ignoring you before. And I’m sorry about earlier. I insulted you about your money and your car, and that was wrong.”
His brows narrow; it’s as if someone’s never apologized to him before. Yet another surprising reaction from this man.
“Thank you. I know my family has money, but it really is such a small part of my life.” A warm smile spreads across his face.“You’d probably be surprised if you met them in person. We’re not like some of the rich families you see on TV. Everyone has a job. Everyone works hard. My dad, especially, made sure we all had a path to independence. He always said, ‘We have money now, but you never know what can happen’.” He chuckles. “When I would complain about people on the ice chirping about my family’s money, he would always tell me the best way to prove them wrong was to work your ass off and show up every day.”
My smile matches his. “Your dad sounds cool.”
“He is. Joseph and Maria Boucher are pretty badass parents, if I do say so myself. But seriously, thank you for the apology.”
“Can I still call you Richy Rich?”
He smirks. “Yeah. I’ll let that one slide.”
“Good. Now that we’ve cleared the air, I’m ready for story time. Tell me why you pulled away from our kiss.”
39
jordan
Holy. Shit. She apologized. She wants to get to know me.Me.My heart does a cautiously optimistic flip in my chest. She wants to kissme—morethan kiss me, actually.Wait…is this some sort of weird dream?Did that bear have some sort of hallucinogen in it? Or is this because I chugged her gin? I would have to be flat out drunk for her to be asking to get to know me more. Right? I rub my hand across the stubble on my chin. I can still feel my face, so I’m not drunk.This is real. I take a deep breath, trying and failing to calm my pounding heart before I lay all my cards on the table.
It’s now or never.
“When I was eighteen, I met this girl, Angelica, at a party after a game. She was pretty and showered me with a lot of attention. I’d never had a girlfriend before—I honestly never had time—but we hit it off and started dating. After a month or so, our fooling around was really heating up, and she started pressuring me to sleep with her. I know, I know. What guy wouldn’t want a girl throwing herself at him, right? Fuck.” I rub my forehead with my hand. “God, this is so cheesy—I can’t believe I’m even talking about this.”
“Jordan,” she says, giving my hand, still resting in her lap, a squeeze. The small gesture steadies me, my chest lifting enough to keep me going. “Listen, we all had a first time, and almost all of them are awkward in some way. Mine was in the back of a pickup truck after a football game. Let me tell you, leather seats in August are not sexy. Seriously…it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Go on.”
Okay, now I’m trying not picture her with another guy in a pickup truck.Focus, Jordan.
“I just always dreamed of it being special, you know? I wanted to have a deep, meaningful relationship with a girl I was madly in love with, woo her, then have a super romantic night where we did it for the first time with candles and rose petals. You know…” —I shrug— “the works. Blame all the chick flicks my sisters made me watch, but that’s just how I’d always imagined things. But Angelica just kept pushing. One night, she begged me, told me she loved me. I convinced myself that it was romantic enough. I told her I loved her, too, and I decided to just give in and go for it. She knew…” —I rub my hands across my pants— “she knew I was still a virgin. It wasn’t because I was saving myself or anything, I just am very…I don’t know…picky, maybe? But she said she was a virgin too, so I figured at least we’d have this. To be each other’s firsts. So…we had sex.”
I run my fingers through my hair, feeling the strands sticking up at odd angles, my ears ringing as I find myself back in that damn room at eight-fucking-teen.
“What I didn’t know was that she’d been lying to me the entire time. She just wanted me for my money. Nothing more. She…she videotaped us. We were at her apartment, and I didn’t know she had a hidden camera in the room. There was no audio, but it was damning. Then she leaked it to the press. After it was out, I confronted her, embarrassed and ashamed, my firsttime was plastered all over the internet. She didn’t care. Added insult? Turns out she wasn’t a virgin either.”
Her jaw tightens as she places her other hand on top of mine. The anger brewing in her gaze at everything I’m telling her reminds me of Vladi. Is she a touch him and die type of woman?Holy shit.She is.
“My whole world came crashing down in a matter of hours. She said she had interviews lined up and that she was going to tell them it was my first time, that she faked everything, and that I was a horrible lay that didn’t know what I was doing, and…fuck…” My eyes burn, but Irefuseto shed any more tears over this. “It was so bad. I felt so betrayed. Looking back, I should have picked up on so many little things about how everything was always about her. How dismissive she was to me at times, like not letting me eat at my favorite poutine place. Even her brown eyes always seemed cold. I was a complete fucking idiot. I immediately called my dad to tell him I fucked up, which meant we had to react quickly.”
She squeezes my hand again, an empathetic smile on her face as tears shine in her eyes. “Jordan. I…I can’t even imagine what that must have been like. The fact that someone did this to you?God,I wish I could punch her in the throat!”
“I like to imagine I’m poking her eyes out with little kabob skewers.”
We both snort, a welcome relief from the heaviness in the air. “I…I wish I had words to say other than I’m so sorry that happened to you. That is not what anyone’s first time should be like.”
