My God. My mouth watered at the sight of him. Connor was ridiculously sexy, and even after all these years together, I still loved his body and never grew tired of it. If anything, as we aged, I loved the small differences. The sunlight filtered in through the window, highlighting the slight curl of his hair, his sharp jawline.
“I liked it,” I whispered, damn well knowing it could change things. I wasn’t sure what I wanted anymore, but I knew I liked being touched by him.
“Laney.” He rubbed his lips together, his heated gaze lingering on my mouth. “I need an answer, baby.”
“Right now?”
He nodded. “Right now.”
This was more nerve-racking than walking down the aisle with him. More unsettling than interviewing for jobs. This choice I made had the possibility of hurting me even more. Visions of his charm yesterday, the way he smiled at me at the event, the way he took my hand and drove me here… the fact I hadn’t been forthcoming with all my hurt.
I nodded.
“What’s that nod mean?” he almost shouted. “Tell me.”
“We can—” I swallowed down the massive ball of nerves. “Date for the month to see if this can work.”
He closed his eyes, and his hand shook as he ran it through his hair three times. Then he met my gaze and beamed at me. The joy on his face took my breath away. I couldn’t recall the last time he seemed this happy, and something warm and gooey formed in my chest.
“Thank you,” he whispered, his smile somehow growing. “This was… I want to… Do you want breakfast?”
My lips curved up. “If you mean you, then yes, I want breakfast.”
“Laney.” He groaned into his fist and approached me, kneeling down and cupping my face. My skin heated. His touch felt different now. I wasn’t at war with myself.
I could enjoy him without worrying about the divorce. Thatwas at the end of the month, not today. I chewed my lip as the look on my husband’s face clouded.
“What is it?”
“I want you. I always want you, but if we’re going to do this, really make sure our marriage is what you want, I don’t… I can’t blur this line. You said it yourself. Attraction wasn’t our issue, and I don’t want you to do anything you regret. You might say you want me now, but you could hate me in two days, and I really won’t survive that.”
“I won’t hate you.” I frowned.
“But you can’t say with one hundred percent certainty that you won’t regret sleeping with me.” He leaned forward and kissed my forehead, lingering for a beat before staring at me affectionately.
Despite the heat coiling in my core from moments before, his words wrapped around me, settling my lust into a comfortable feeling. He was right. One hundred percent correct. A soft laugh escaped me, and I pushed my hair behind my ears.
“Then yes to breakfast. Food is about the only thing that could distract me right now.”
His throat bobbed before he nodded. “Thank you for understanding and not being upset with me,” Connor said.
“Ba—Connor.” My skin flushed as I stumbled over his old nickname. “You’re being considerate and rational about this. I can’t be upset about that at all. Yeah, my skin feels too tight and I’d really like your hands on me, but it’s not the right time.”
I stood and adjusted the sweatshirt and sweats. The power must’ve come back on during the night because there wasn’t a chill in the air anymore. I put my hair up in a messy bun and caught Connor staring at me with one dimple popping out.
“What?” I asked, a little nervous. He stared at me, hard.
“You look so fucking pretty in the morning. You’re beautiful all the time, but I love the way you look in the morning. You open your eyes, and they can’t decide if they are hazel or dark brown, and your face has all these sleepy lines on it. I know I haven’t been around when you’ve woken up lately, but I’ve missed you in the morning.”
I blushed from head to toe. He always had a way of complimenting me and having the words penetrate every protective wall I had and take root in my soul.
“Well, thanks.”
“I’ll start coffee. Then we can find food.”
“Okay, I’ll use the restroom.”
He winked at me before walking toward the kitchen, his broad back and tight sweatpants causing my eyes to linger. My core still throbbed, but talking and spending time together mattered more than scratching an itch. I quickly used the bathroom and washed my face, taking a minute to breathe.
