She rolled over, her feet dangling over the bed. She got up and walked to her closet, putting on an extra-large shirt that covered her to her thighs. She then tossed me my shorts with a half-smile. “I can feel you about to lose it. Put these on and go back upstairs.”
“I’m not…freaking out.” I slid my shorts on, glad to not be naked anymore. The air was tense again, and I tried reading every expression on her face. Her cheeks were still flushed and her hair wild, but her eyes were distant.Fuck.“I just—”
“I know.” She did another fake smile I’d seen at the bar. She used it on patrons who were annoying her. “I knew what this would mean to you and what I was getting into. There’s no agenda or secret plot to change you. I wanted you. We both had fun. This can be one of your three nights, right?”
Fun seemed too simple of a word for what we’d done. But I didn’t know what else to say. Her words were what Ishouldwant to hear. A free pass. No drama. Three nights only. Yet, it seemed wrong and off. I didn’t understand how to cope with that, so I nodded. “Yeah. Fun.”
She chewed the side of her lip, glancing at the door before yawning. “I’m beat.”
“Right.” I was beingdismissed.“Well, good night.”
She did another tight-eyed smile before opening her door and walking me out. I wanted to kiss her again, tell her this was different than my casual fucks, but I wasn’t sure whatdifferentsignified for me. She did say one of three nights, so maybe that meant we could definitely do this again. I knew I didn’t ever want to hurt her, and I probably already had. I knew she made me feel things I hadn’t in years. But more importantly, the worst thing was that I knew I could never be who she deserved. I couldn’t be the guy to give her swoons and romantic gestures. One her brother approved of.
I lifted my fingers in a wave, headed upstairs, and tried to come up with a plan to save my relationship with Elle. Because if I lost her…as a friend, co-worker, whatever she was, my life would lose the best part of it.
CHAPTER
NINETEEN
Elle
“Islept with Cal Holt.” I stared at my bowl of cereal but felt Daniella’s eyes on me.
“We can call him Cal. I know what Cal we’re referring to.”
“Cal Holt sounds more official.”
“Is this a fancy conversation?” she quipped back.
I looked up to see her smiling. “What?”
“I’m not surprised at all. Y’all had this weird chemistry last year when we had that dinner. Remember? He stared at you the whole time and you with your Holt posters…so how was it?”
Gratitude for my friend made me want to hug her. “You’re not gonna lecture me like my damn brother?”
“First, we’ve been besties way longer than me and Van have been together. And frankly, he can fuck right out of this.” She leaned onto the table, her eyes going wide. “Sure, I’m worried Cal could hurt you, but you don’t seem broken, so I want details.”
“It was…” I trailed off, my face heating. The way he touched me, looked at me, spoke to me… “Hot.”
“Love that for you.” She did a little Alexis Rose shimmy. “Glad I stayed at Gabe’s last night.”
“If you were here, I probably would’ve sent him home when he knocked on the door at one am.”
“Sexy.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “Tell me everything.”
I filled her in on the almost moment at Gabe’s, the kiss at the bar, being interrupted and then last night. I still hadn’t grasped what we did. We were friends. Bad for each other. Yet the sex and chemistry were… chef’s kiss. It made every single interaction I ever had with a past guy seem… laughable. Dull. Nonsignificant to my life in any way. They were all black and white films, and he was the high definition 3-D version of movies. Even thinking about Cal had my skin tingling. “He stood there as soon as we were done, looking panicked as hell. Like he had no idea what to do, and that part sucked.”
“Well, he’s used to one-night or two-night stands.” Dani shrugged. “I’m glad you finally got some, and let’s be real, you’ve crushed on him for years. But… here’s the question. What now?”
“Don’t know.” I rubbed my temples. “We see each other all the time. Every day. But I want romance, and he wants a few fucks and no emotions. This broke both our rules.”
“Rules are stupid. I wasn’t supposed to really date your brother, but here we are.”
“Dani.” I leveled my gaze with her. “You’ve always loved him.”
“Pot, you’ve always had a thing for Cal.”
“You’re the worst.”
