I’m grateful to have another chance at the life I almost lost entirely.
But I am exhausted… and terrified.
I should be nothing but excited to go home, to sleep in my own bed and escape the sterile walls and constant sounds of the hospital. But there’s a small, nagging part that wonders, what if I mess this up? What if my body betrays me and rejects the new heart? What if I fought so hard only for it all to be ripped away?
I push the thoughts away as Alex helps me into clothes Cam brought from my house—a soft sweatshirt and leggings that feel like heaven compared to the stiff hospital gown I’ve been living in for who knows how long now. He’s been hovering all morning, even though he’s pretending he’s not. But I notice himwatching my every move, his hands twitching and ready to catch me if I so much as wobble.
“Ready?” he asks, holding out a thicker winter jacket.
I take it and put it over myself, nestling in the warmth from it.
Alex insisted on being the one to take me home. He said it like it wasn’t even a topic up for discussion. And honestly, it’s not like I would’ve argued.
Stepping outside for the first time in weeks, maybe a month at this point, is overwhelming. The cold air rushes into my lungs, crisp and clean. I just stand there outside the hospital doors for a couple seconds, closing my eyes as I tilt my head up toward the winter sky, letting the sun warm up.
“Em?”
I open my eyes to find Alex watching me in worry.
“I’m okay,” I reassure him, savoring the feeling of fresh air, of freedom. “This just feels good.”
A ghost of a smile tugs at his lips, but the worry doesn’t escape his face.
When we pull up to my house, Alex doesn’t give me a chance to move. He’s out of the truck and at my door in record time, opening it before I can even reach for the door handle.
I roll my eyes but let out a small chuckle. “Alex, I got it.”
“Let me help you.”
“I can do it by myself.”
“I’d rather die than let you.” He counters, not accepting my words as a good enough reason for him not to help me.
I huff out a frustrated sigh, but I really don’t really mind. Alex may be infuriating, but I know his intentions are always good.
Once inside, something inside me finally settles.
I’m home.
Everything looks exactly the same as it did on Christmas Day, the last time I was here. The decorations are still hung upthroughout the house, the scents of the holiday still fill the air. A small sadness forms inside of me at the thought of my favorite holiday now being a reminder of the day I collapsed into a coma in front of all my family and friends.
I turn to Alex, suddenly feeling guilty of having him around. “You don’t have to do this, you know.”
He’s instantly confused at my words. “Do what, Princess?”
“All of this.” I gesture vaguely. “You don’t have to stay. You can go back to your normal life.”
His expression hardens. “Don’t you dare.”
“I don’t want to be a burden,” I blurt out as tears form in my eyes.
Alex steps into me, those damn hazel eyes burning into mine. “I’m here because I want to be. You’re it for me, Em. You always have been.”
I don’t know what to say to that. So instead, I reach for him, wrapping my arms around his waist, pressing my face into his chest. I don’t know how long he holds me there, but eventually, he leads me to the bedroom and helps me into bed. He seems to debate for half a second whether or not he should before finally climbing in beside me. His warmth seeps into my body and grounds me.
I tilt my head up to look at him. His face is softer for the first time in weeks, the tension in his jaw finally easing.
“I love you.” I whisper.
