“I do,” I lied.
Alex’s face went blank, something switching off inside of him. Then, I did the one thing I knew would break him. I turned around, walked away and never looked back. The next morning I left Windhaven without seeing him again. I couldn’t. As I made the trip to Manhattan, a part of me stayed behind, in the bookstore, on the porch, in the back of his truck. With Alex.
I shake my head and try to push those thoughts away. I’ve got bigger problems to deal with, like figuring out how to turn this drafty, old house into something livable before winter sets in or my very own heart decides to take me out first.
Flicking on more lights as I make my way through the house, the poor state of it becomes reality. The place is in worse shape than I remember.
But it’smine. It's all I have.
As I run my fingers over the dusty wood stove in the living room, a thin layer of soot stains my skin. The empty hearth inside is covered in cobwebs, a forgotten relic of what I imagine was once a warm, inviting space. Now, it’s just cold and silent.
Growing up, the boys always handled the task of keeping thestoves burning in the colder months, so I never learned how to properly start one. Now, it’s biting me in the ass and I am going to freeze to death in this ice box. I regret not asking Leo to teach me how to work it beforehand, instead of being stubborn and desperate to leave that house.
I pull out my phone and I send a text in our group thread.
I will regret saying this later, but you guys were right. This place is as cold as I imagine it is in the Arctic Circle during the middle of winter.
Cam
I told you so.
Frankie
Sucks
Leo
Want me to bring you back here for the night?
Oh now you offer to give me a ride. I’ll live (at least for tonight)
"Get it together, Emiliana," I mutter under my breath, the sound feeling foreign in the empty house. Dropping onto the old couch, its springs groan under my weight. I call Dallas, in need of a distraction and she picks up on the first ring.
"Hey, stranger." Her voice crackles through the line as the familiar sounds of Manhattan hum in the background. “Are you alive? Did you make it okay? Do I need to bail you out of Windhaven county jail for decking someone at the train station? Because, babe, I will. You know I’ll wear my cutest outfit and smile sweetly at the officers and everything?—”
“I just got to town not too long ago.” I cut her rant off by a few minutes. Clearing my throat, I get off the couch to pace atight circle in the middle of the dusty living room. “I’m at the yellow house now.”
She goes quiet for a beat, shifting into Best Friend Mode, with her antenna up and ready to act at the drop of a hat. “And? How bad is it? Your brothers? The house? The town? Scale of one to running back here screaming?”
I swallow hard and lean against the nearest wall, sliding down until I’m sitting on the floor, knees tucked up, and phone pressed tight to my ear. “I’m fine,” I lie smoothly. It pours out like muscle memory. “House is standing. Brothers are still breathing. Town hasn’t burned down yet. Gold stars all around.”
Dallas snorts. “Okay, drama queen. Try again. For real this time.”
My throat feels hot and tight when I speak again. “I saw him.”
There’s a pause sharp enough to cut glass. I don’t have to say his name or give any other details for Dallas to know exactly who I am talking about. In our ten years of friendship, Alex has unfortunately been brought up more times than I would like to admit.
“Oh, Em,” she breathes out. I can hear the concern in her voice.
“I should’ve planned better. How did I think I wasn’t going to see him at Friday family dinner,” I mumble, dragging a hand through my now-tangled hair, tugging at the ends until my scalp stings. “He just walked in like it was any other day.”
“I’m guessing by your tone that you did not welcome him with open arms and a fruit basket.”
I bark out a hollow laugh that sounds more like a choke on air. “We got into a fight, in his truck.”
I don’t even realize I am now twisting the hem of my sleeve into knots until my knuckles start to turn white. “He offered to drive me here. My brothers basically forced me to let him. And the second we were alone, I lost it. I told him I left becauseloving him wasn’t enough to keep me here.” I pause, still not believing it myself. “Isaid thatto him, Dallas.”
Silence stretches long and thin across the line. I can picture her perfectly curled up on her sleek gray couch, feet tucked under her, pen stuck behind her ear even though she doesn’t need it, brows knit together like she’s strategizing a murder plot on my behalf.
