What am I saying? Out loud.
“Why can’t you be both?” Elias shrugs. He does that thing where he stares at me again. My face heats up. I’m telling myself to look away and finding that I can’t. I don’t want to.
When he leans closer again, I keep my eyes open long enough to greedily take in the freckles lining the top of his nose. The little mole beside his mouth. The arched shape of his eyebrows and the few stray hairs between them.
He kisses me again. Slow at first. Gently, yet insistentlyprying my mouth open with his tongue. The second I let him in, the restraint loosens. The kiss deepens and he groans into my open mouth.
I’m so hard it’s embarrassing. I hope he doesn’t notice. But there’s a part of me that doesn’t care. That must be the part that has one hand tangled in his hair and the other stroking his chest through his shirt.
Elias follows my lead, taking it one step further and unbuttoning my shirt before pulling away and looking down at me. He’s panting, lips parted and swollen from all the rough kissing. I wonder how good it would feel if he hadn’t shaved. His stubble brushing against my skin.
He dives back in, licking a stripe up my neck. I make an embarrassingly unrestrained noise—something between a whine and a moan. Elias seems to like it because he climbs between my legs and grinds against me.
Holy crap, is he hard, too? For me?
He keeps rutting against me, slow, but persistent. His mouth brushing against mine before kissing and licking my neck. My eyes roll back and my toes curl.
Oh crap, no, please …
It’s too late. By the time I manage to tear myself away, my underwear is sticky and the realization that I just came in my pants washes over me.
I lay still, trying to catch my breath. Elias has gone completely still on top of me.
Oh God, oh God, oh God.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.”
The second Elias moves, I press my weight against him and he rolls off.
His voice follows me as I rush to the bathroom, trying tocall me back, but I’m determined to hide until the humiliation of what just happened disappears, I may be hiding in this bathroom forever.
14
ELIAS
Okay, so, that happened.
I stare at the door connecting Ben’s room to a private bathroom, waiting for it to open. When a few more minutes pass after the sound of running water stops and it doesn’t, I get up and tap on the wood.
No reply.
I tap again.
Eventually, a small voice replies.
“I’m okay.”
“Ben, are you going to come out?”
“No, thanks.”
A laugh huffs out of me and I press my forehead against the door.
“I’m very flattered.”
“Stop!”
