The knowledge was crushing. My mind fought it. My fucking soul fought it. But this was the only way for me to survive. I faced the same choice Shale had. Wither away for love or sacrifice it and live. I wanted to live. No, I couldn't truly take back my love for Shale. Nor could I sacrifice it to a god. He would own a piece of me forever. But I could save the rest of myself. I could walk away now and eventually, I would move past this. It would hurt for a long time, but I wouldn't curl up and die as Shale had tried to do. I would survive.IfI left now.
“You know I have nothing more to offer,” Shale said. “I care for you, Sebastian. Your pain hurts me. But I cannot love you. I will never love you.”
“I do know that,” I said and backed away. “I've always known. But I never thought it would hurt like this.”
“Sebastian,” he whispered.
“I'm sorry too, Shale. But I've finished your garden. It's thriving again, as you are. You've remembered how to live. You can be happy even if you can't feel love. I'm glad for that. I can leave knowing you—”
“You cannot leave!” Shale roared and grabbed my arms. Gone was his calm. Gone in a heartbeat.
I just stared at him. I was calm enough for the both of us.
His voice dropped into a whisper again, “Sebastian.”
“Let go, my love,” I said firmly. “I'm so sorry, but you have to let go.”
“No,” Shale said. “And you promised to never let go of me.”
“Lovers make promises they sometimes can't keep. You will forgive me. Eventually.”
His grip tightened. “No, I won't. Because you are going to keep your promise.”
“Shale, if you care about me at all, you will let me go. This is killing me.”
The Dragon King's face crumpled.
Then it filled with rage.
The pain in me fell to my feet, pushed down as fear climbed upward. “Shale,” I whispered.
“You aren't going anywhere,” Shale declared. “You are mine. My doll. And you are staying right here.” He shoved me backward as if he didn't trust himself to touch me any longer, then turned around and stormed out of the bedroom.
“Shale!” I ran after him. “Shale!”
I caught up with him in the stairwell. He was speaking to Gunrel, and Gunrel looked grim.
“Yes, Your Majesty,” Gunrel said and turned his stare on me. “I will look after him.”
Shale grunted and left.
“What the fuck?” I growled and tried to follow.
Gunrel firmly but respectfully grabbed my upper arm. “I can't allow you to leave, King's Consort. I'm sorry.”
“What?” I gaped at Gunrel, then shouted after Shale, “So now I'm a fucking prisoner? Are you going to make me a bed slave like they have in the oceans? Huh, Shale? Shale!”
But he didn't answer, just kept going, the sound of his footsteps ominous in the narrow space.
I glared at Gunrel. “Let go of me.”
He let go but settled in the middle of the step, blocking my way.
“He can't do this. I'm not his property.”
“He is the King,” was all Gunrel said.
He didn't have to say anything more. It was implied. Dragon Kings could do whatever the fuck they wanted. And the rest of us just fucking dealt with it.
