“This taking lovers thing. The war. I want to be with Rath, Xae, and Kel. That's it. No more.”
“Not even Taroc?”
Something in my chest shivered. “I . . .”
“You are both attracted and repelled by your destiny,” Death said. “But you need to understand something important, Ember.”
“What?” I whispered.
“Having a destiny does not mean you have no choice.”
He let that sink in.
And it did.
My shoulders melted. Breath left me. Then I inhaled deeply. This was my choice. All of it. There would be consequences for every decision I made, some good and some bad. But I had the power to decide. I could stop now if I wanted to. Or I could bond with Taroc and then stop. I could keep taking lovers, end the war, then demand a home with my favorites. So many choices.
“Yes, I see you understand now,” Death said. “You and only you have the power here, Ember. Take control. Forget your lovers, the Emperor, and even the Goddess. What doyouwant to do?”
I shot to my feet. “I want to end this war. Now!”
“I can help you do that. Do you want my help?”
“Yes,” I said with grim determination. “Yes, I do.”
Chapter Forty-Three
A week later, I was settled into my new routine. During the day, I trained for physical combat, helped Xae and Kel learn to control their magic, and then worked with Death on constructing a ward. At night, however, long after my men had fallen asleep, I faded to a forest glade and trained with Death freely.
Death taught me to sense the heartbeat in all living things, expanding upon what he'd started with the tree. From there, we went into life force and its counter, death force. He showed me things I didn't know existed. Things that were obvious but went unnoticed. How even immortals go through a cycle of life and death at a very tiny level. Our flesh rebuilds itself faster than mortals, and that restoration is a process of things dying within us and being replaced by new. Once I understood this, the magic opened to me. I had to know what to look for and where to look in order to find it. I had to find it in the world around me to completely understand it. And I had to understand it to control it.
Had I become a Master of Death? No. There was so much to learn. Death trained me about the magic itself before going into individual aspects of it. But he said that soon, I'd be ready for spells. Spells beyond casting a ward. Spells that could conquer the Corrupter.
I returned to the citadel after my latest training session with Death, stepping out of the arrival chamber to immediately fade to the sitting room of our suite. I entered near the door, just in case one of my men had gotten up. But all was quiet in the room. I took a step toward the bedroom.
A soft sound stopped me. I paused and listened. It was coming from the corridor. Carefully, I opened the door and peeked out. The sound grew louder. It came from around the corner at the end of the hallway. Someone was crying.
Thinking it was one of the children, I went down the corridor and around the corner. There I found a huddled form. “Hey,” I whispered. “What's wrong?”
The form flinched, and a head lifted. It wasn't one of the kids. It was Caleb.
“Ember!” he whispered back and swiped at his face. “I didn't think anyone was up.”
“I heard you.” I sat down next to him. “What's going on, Caleb?”
“Oh, nothing. Just the usual.” He shrugged and looked away, but as he did, he wrapped his arms around his knees.
His sleeves rose, and I caught a hint of darkness.
I grabbed Caleb's hand and shoved his sleeve up. There were bruises on his forearm. “What the fuck?” I hissed. “Who did this to you?”
Caleb jerked back and drew down his sleeve. “No one.” He looked away again. “It was an accident. I hurt myself while working at Fress.”
“That does not come from an accident!” I pointed at his wrist. “That comes from someone grabbing you. Are you hurt anywhere else?”
“Ember, please,” he said tiredly. “Just leave it be.”
“The fuck I will. Who did this? It can't be one of the Lords. They would never . . .” I trailed off as his gaze shivered and slid away. “No. Fuck. Caleb.”
