“Where are you?” I looked around Raza's office as if Danu were hiding in it somewhere. “How can you just stop talking to me? How can you do any of this? I don't understand you.”
Cat looked up from where she was resting on the thick carpet beside my feet and sighed. Her liquid, brown eyes seemed sad but resigned.
“Do you know what's going on?” I asked her. “Did she tell you?”
Cat just laid her head back on her paws and huffed some fur out of her face.
“Sorry,” I sighed. “I know, I'm losing my mind. But when you have a goddess turn against you, right when you need her the most, it can be a little disconcerting.”
“Seren?” Raza walked into the room, clad only in a crimson, velvet robe.
His wings were gone, as he'd made his claws vanish the other night. It was a trick I'd only recently learned he could do. Raza had revealed his djinn powers to me. Powers which allowed him to change into any form he wished. He had a whole wealth of magic at his disposal, but the changing shape thing was pretty impressive. He had been reluctant to show me, wanting me to get to know him as he was before he revealed that he could be anyone I wanted. I told him I didn't want anyone else. Except that wasn't really true anymore.
Sweet Goddess, I was dreading talking to Raza about Tiernan and Killian. Raza had cried when I told him I only wanted him, the real him. Cried. I had made a dragon cry. Now I was going to tell him that I changed my mind, and I did want other men...twoof them. I couldn't. No. Looking at his proud face, his wicked beauty, and knowing it was all a mask, that the real Raza was as vulnerable as the rest of us, made me realize I couldn't ask it of him. I would be content with my dragon, which really wasn't a hard task, and I would find another way to unite Fairy.
“What is it?” Raza slid his hand up my cheek, and into my hair. “Why are you up so early?”
“I wanted to speak to the Councils,” I shrugged. “Killian has gone to meet with the Coven and the Casters. He left at dawn.”
“Stop worrying so much, Seren,” Raza got on one knee before me. “We will conquer this, as we have conquered everything else which dared to stand against us.”
“I know,” I slid into his embrace.
“There's something else troubling you,” he whispered into my ear.
“No, I'm fine,” I sighed.
“The added support from the Nine Sons will make Craos-Teine nearly impenetrable,” Raza pulled back to look at me. “They will not take Unseelie from us.”
“I know. I trust you,” I said. Then I admitted, “It's Danu that has me worried. Why would she desert us?”
“I don't know,” he sat back on the floor and pulled me into his lap. “It troubles me too, but I keep having this feeling that Danu is not betraying us. She has a plan.”
“Danu's plans are often in opposition to what I want,” I stroked the blood-red strip of hair back from his temple. “What if it tears us apart?”
“Nothing can do that,” Raza vowed his jaw clenching. “I will be dead in the ground before anyone takes you from me.”
“You're right,” I kissed him gently, “and I will be down there beside you because no one can take you from me either. But what if it's not about taking? What if something happens to make you cast me aside?”
“Seren,” Raza scowled at me. “Tell me what's going through your head, that you would say such things.”
“It's just that Danu's plans have a way of unfolding, even when I try to stop her,” I chewed on my lip. “Sometimes, they even become my own plans, and that's what scares me the most.”
“You're talking in riddles,” Raza scowled. “Tell me plainly.”
“I'm changing,” I whispered. “My personality, my perspective, everything about me is altering, twisting, and I don't know if I like who I'm becoming.”
“Changes have happened in your life, and in your heart,” Raza shrugged. “You've taken on several roles that are each challenging in their own right. It may seem like these things have altered who you are, and I'm sure they have in small ways, but the real you, the one who I love, will never change. You are simply Seren; strong, brave, generous, kind, perceptive, and magical. Those are your truths. Hold to them, and when you start to falter, I'll hold them for you. I'll remind you of who you are.”
I kissed him, loving him completely. But somewhere in the back of my mind, I remembered another man who had sworn to remind me of who I was. The human part of me. And that part of me was drawn to Killian. Was it traitorous to think of Killian while I held Raza? Or could one woman truly love more than one man without betraying any of them?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
The sea fey soldiers arrived two days later. Daiyu was true to her word, and a huge host of assorted water fairies took up residence in the lake, at the foot of the mountain which held Craos-Teine. The lake was vast, which was a good thing, since not only were the new soldiers staying there, but there were already several unseelie water fey in residence. Raza had a few tents constructed on the shore, where provisions were stored and meals distributed, but for the most part, the sea fey remained in the water.
“I don't think it's fair that most sea fairies can breathe air in addition to being able to breathe underwater,” I mused as I stared down at the lake from Raza's window.
“Think of it as one of their magics,” Raza slid in behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. “You have numerous talents, breathing air is simply one of theirs.”
