Somehow, we ended up on the floor in the wide kitchen doorway. Jamie leaned back to the doorframe and I sobbed on his lap.
“Your suit—”
“Don’t you even,” he said in a kind, firm tone. “You’re my best friend, Bear. If you need to ruin one suit that can be dry cleaned anyway, then that’s what you’re gonna do.”
I uglysnorted and held onto him, letting out all the bad things I’d been holding onto.
I don’t know how long it took us to gather me up and move onto the couch. Jamie wrapped me in a blanket, got me a bottle of water, and went to change clothes.
Feeling parched, I drank the water and curled up with the blanket. Jamie came back in a T-shirt and some pajama pants with Captain America’s shields on them.
“Here, I brought you Tonya.” He handed her over and sat next to me.
“Thank you.” I pulled her under the blanket with me and burrowed against Jamie. He put on his favorite sitcom, Modern Family, and we watched episode after episode until Mal came home.
“Well, hello there, boys,” he said, looking tired, but he was smiling. “You cozy?”
“Yes, Daddy, we’re real cozy,” Jamie said in his… well, not quite little voice. But then to these two, the honorifics worked differently anyway.
Mal came over and gave Jamie a kiss, then leaned closer to me and kissed my forehead. “Hello Bear.”
“Hi.”
He patted my shoulder. “Do I smell Chinese?”
“Oh, yeah, I got lots when I was coming home, but we haven’t eaten yet.”
Mal leveled us a look. “And why is that?” I knew they, too, had a rule of taking care of yourself especially after working all day.
I quickly threw myself under the bus. “I needed a good cry and then a better cuddle.”
Mal chuckled. “I can understand that, but how about you two go make sure the food is warmed up by the time I come out of the shower, okay? Long day, and I need cuddles, too.” Then he turned and walked up the stairs to their room.
We did that, and when Mal came downstairs, wearing pajama pants and nothing else, he seemed a little more relaxed.
“Daddy what’s our plan for tomorrow?” Jamie asked as we settled to eat in the living room.
“Well I have two blessed days off work, so I’m going to sleep as long as I can, and then I really don’t have anything else in mind.”
Jamie nodded. “I need to go to the office for a few hours in the morning, but that’s it for me.”
They both looked at me, then, and I shrugged. “I don’t know. I have no plans. I….” I sighed.
Jamie reached over to pat my thigh. “If you feel crappy, it’s okay. If not, that’s gonna be fine, too.”
Mal nodded seriously. “Whatever you need to feel right now, Bear, it’s okay.” Then he smiled at me. “If you and Jamie want to go full on little tomorrow, I’m not against some babysitting duties.”
Jamie squeaked and did a silly chair dance on the couch. Couch dance?
I chuckled. “I’ll think about it. It’s been… I haven’t really been able to regress since the accident. Not properly anyway. I… my temper has been really bad, swinging from one end of the spectrum to the other with no reason, so….”
“I don’t mind if you get mad at me sometimes without reason. I know it’s just your brain being stupid.” Jamie smiled at me a bit sadly. “I hate that your brain is doing that, though.”
“What my boy said. It’s rough, I’ve seen a lot of different types of brain injuries at work over the years, and I might’ve talked about your situation with Jamie when it first happened.” Mal kissed Jamie’s temple. “He got worried and I needed to—”
“No, I understand. Of course. Handy to have a doctor in the house when something needs to be explained,” I teased Jamie who giggled. “These things are hard to understand.”
“They are, and we still don’t know everything about the brain—”
