“I need to go make sure Spike comes inside for the night, honey. This is your time to decide whether you want to sleep in my room or the guestroom.” Adrian’s smile was understanding, and that made it easier for Ben to make his way to Adrian’s bedroom while the man got Spike settled.
He felt nervous again as he undressed, but when Adrian came back and went about his evening routine as if there was nothing strange about having Ben there, he settled again.
“Relax, I’m not going to jump you until you ask me to,” Adrian said, obviously noticing that Ben tensed when it was time to climb into bed.
“It’s not that—”
“Well of course you don’t think I’d try to do anything against your will, Ben, I know that. But there’s a part of you that’s always thought itself straight. It’s bound to be weird and I get it.”
“You came out at fifteen, though,” Ben muttered as he slid under the covers and made himself comfortable.
“I did. It doesn’t mean I didn’t have my fears and doubts, though. They might’ve been different at the time, but they still existed, just like yours.”
Adrian reached to turn off the lights and Ben closed his eyes to get his eyesight to adjust faster. He wanted to see Adrian in the dim moonlight, since they laid face-to-face.
“I never thought my life would change this much at this age,” he admitted quietly.
“Is it weird if I tell you I feel honored to be part of that change?” Adrian asked almost shyly.
Ben held out a hand and Adrian took it. It felt sweet, holding hands. It hadn’t been like that for Ben in years. Then again most of his relationships with women hadn’t worked. He just hadn’t been that into them and hadn’t known what the fuss was about.
Speaking of which, “So… do you like…?”
“Top or bottom?” Adrian asked, grinning as if he’d known Ben was going to ask it.
“Don’t laugh at me, it’s a valid question!” Ben huffed in mock outrage, but he could see the humor in the situation, too.
“It is. It’s just cute when you ask it,” Adrian said and leaned closer to peck Ben’s lips. “And to answer that, I don’t really have a preference. It’s okay if you’ll end up having one. Sex is great anyway.”
“When I did my online research—stop laughing at me!” Ben poked Adrian’s chest with his free hand and pouted a little.
Trying to suppress a smile, Adrian snorted. “Sorry, sorry… what did you online research discover?”
“Someone said that they liked it both ways and that for them it was about mood. Then someone else said they didn’t like penetrative sex at all.”
“And you’re wondering if that’s possible because men like sticking their dicks into holes?” he made an educated guess. “I know men who don’t like it. Either it’s painful for them or they’re squeamish, I know someone who couldn’t because he’d been abused. But then I also know people who have been abused and have fulfilling penetrative sex, too. I think of it as to each their own.”
Ben mulled over what Adrian had said, and eventually nodded. “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.”
“You just let me know when you’re ready to do something, and we’ll try things out, okay?” Adrian leaned closer again, this time giving him a deeper kiss.
They made out like teenagers, and Ben had to admit he’d never gotten as hard so fast as he did right then. But it wasn’t time yet, he still had things to wrap his mind around first.
The lamp on the bedside table went on.
“What now?” Adrian asked the ceiling, sighing.
“Yeah, stalkery much, Gavin?” Ben added.
“I think he just wants to watch and be acknowledged.” Adrian chuckled.
“Well when we start having actual sex, I’ll fucking burn sage or something beforehand to keep him out. It’s one thing to stare at my ass and to watch us have sex.”
Adrian blushed suddenly and avoided Ben’s gaze. “Uh….”
“What?” Ben looked at him, confused.
“He might’ve watched me masturbate a few times.”
