“Hmm?”
I didn’t mean to say that part out loud. “Drives. Just driving for the sake of driving. When I was little, we were pretty poor, and sometimes all my mom could afford to do was take me for a drive someplace. When gas wasn’t too expensive.”
“Too much other stuff to do.” He snorts. “You can go on YouTube and watch a video somebody took of a drive they went on.”
I can’t help but laugh. “Right? It’s so bizarre, like videos of people opening boxes. They’re so popular. I don’t get it.”
“If there’s one thing I’ve learned working for the boss, it’s that you can’t figure out what people are into.”
“I guess you see a lot.”
“I do.” I can see him glancing my way from behind his sunglasses. “It’s not always fun. I guess I want you to know that. We’ve all got shit we’re trying to take care of, you know? Lucian pays well. That kind of money takes care of a lot of shit.”
There’s something in his voice I’ve never heard before. Like there might be a human being in there. “I never thought of it that way, I have to admit.”
“Everybody’s got a cross to bear. Something my mom used to say when I was a kid. She can’t say much of anything anymore.”
I think I get the message he’s trying to send. He has people he takes care of. He was probably in the same sort of spot I was in or something close to it. Desperate. Who’s going to say no to that kind of money when they have a shit ton of medical bills piling up? I know how that goes, for sure.
He looks my way again. “Shit went bad last time you were with him.”
“Shit went bad the last two times,” I point out.
“You mean when you passed out from an orgasm? Yes, it looked like you had a terrible time.”
My face suddenly feels like it’s on fire. Sometimes I forget that Alexei fucked me at the club. Probably my mind suppressing it.
“It was intense, you were overwhelmed, but you weren’t hurt.”
“No, not that time… but it’s not just about physical injury; it’s not just the nail thing. I trusted him, and he broke that trust—both times.”
“So that’s what made it so different for both of you?”
I nod slowly. “Is he pissed?”
“No. I wouldn’t use that word—though if he is, I think he’s more pissed at himself than anybody else. Not at you. He freaked out when I told him you wanted to go to the doctor. He went all pale.”
It’s tempting to imagine that. “Yeah, probably because he was afraid I’d sue or something.”
“No. It wasn’t like that. I’ve never seen him like this before.”
I chew my lip as the scenery around us changes. There’s a strip mall up ahead with a handful of chain restaurants in the parking lot. “Can we stop up there for a burger?”
He nods and pulls the car into the lot. It’s no surprise that he orders two double burgers and an extra-large fry. I settle on a single burger and a soda.
It’s strangely normal, sitting here like this. Eating fast food in a parking lot like we’re just two people hanging out. Somehow, that gives me the courage to talk to him like I’d talk to a normal person. “What do you mean, you’ve never seen Lucian like this before? What’s so different about him now?”
He snorts before polishing off his first burger. “He’s different. I don’t know. Like he really cares about you.”
I can’t believe how much I want to believe that. “He has an odd way of showing it, doesn’t he?”
“He does, though. Just remember there might be things you don’t know about.”
Oh, that makes me feel a lot better. “Like what?”
“Just things.” I’m pretty sure he finishes his second burger in all of three bites. “He cares a lot more about you than I’ve ever seen him care about anybody, and I’ve been working for him a long time. And no, he didn’t tell me to say that, so don’t bother asking.”
That makes me laugh again because I was going to say something like that. “Fine. I’ll trust you.” Even if I don’t know what to think about it. One more layer to the mystery that is Lucian.
