“Don’t say that.” She reaches out and squeezes my hand. “You’re a good man too, Drew, and you deserve to be happy.” Her eyes probe mine. “I don’t know what happened with Jane, and I know you don’t like talking about it. But whatever it is, it’s not your fault. No one could have loved her more. If that’s what’s holding you back from moving on, please let it go.” She stands as I swirl whiskey in my glass. “What I have with Rick is true, deep, passionate love, and it’s the best feeling in the entire world. I really want that for you. I watched you with Athena today, and I know it was supposedly a big joke, but I saw something between you. There is a spark, a connection. It’s none of my business, and you don’t have to say a word, but if there is something there, don’t fight it, Drew, and don’t run away from it.” She leans in and kisses my cheek. “Love is as scary as it is exhilarating. Opening yourself up and sharing everything you are with another person is terrifying, but the reward is so worth it.”
She walks toward the door, stopping and turning around to deliver these parting words of wisdom: “Don’t shut her out, Drew. Know you are worthy and let her in. What have you got to lose?”
ChapterTwenty-Three
Athena
I’m parked up on the hill on my bike, scanning the hotel grounds with my night vision binoculars for any sign of Drew or Charlie, but there is nothing, nada, zilch, and I’m frustrated. They went into the hotel hours ago, and I’ve never wished I was a fly more desperately in my life. I’m dying to know what’s going on and I hate being in the dark.
At least today wasn’t a total wipeout. There was only a skeleton staff at the office, and Drew didn’t show up until after lunch, so I managed to sneak around Hilary’s desk, and I found a spare set of keys to Drew’s office. I got a duplicate set made on my lunchbreak, and I put the keys back where I found them. Now, I just need to find a way to get into the security system to turn off the cameras so I can get into his office and search it.
I’m not sure going to his mom’s house yesterday was a good idea. I was melancholy the rest of the night at home. I loved the whole day, and I can’t remember the last time I was that happy or had that much fun. Thanksgiving in Lowell hasn’t been fun since Mom died. I sunk into a bit of a funky mood when I got back to my apartment. I couldn’t stop thinking about my life and all the things I thought I’d have at thirty.
I have always known I was unhappy, but I had never admitted it to myself.
Now that I have confronted the stark reality of my life, I don’t know what to do with it.
The irony is Drew thinks the joke’s on him after yesterday, but the truth is the joke’s on me.
I have my brother, my business, and a hot guy who fucks all coherent thoughts from my head.
But that’s it, and most is transient.
I’m at risk of losing my brother to the Luminaries, my business is really just a way to spend time and a cover for my missions, and what I have with Beast is temporary. He will move on soon to another woman, and I’ll be left with a big void in my life because I already know I’m done with the sex club when our agreement comes to an end. He has ruined me for all other men, and I won’t be able to go to the club without wondering who he is and thinking about whoever he’s currently fucking.
So, yeah, I’m the loser, and Drew is the winner because he has multiple people who care about him, a career he seems to love, and a goal to eradicate the world of evil pricks.
I can’t even say I do good because I’m just my father’s lackey, and most of my missions are personal to him. Like seducing the son of a rival to get inside intel he can use to destroy their business. Or killing some asshole who double-crossed him and made him look bad. And worming my way into competitor companies so I can steal their new products and he can launch to market before them.
The roar of an engine claims my attention, yanking me out of my depressive inner monologue, and I mentally beat myself up for missing them leaving. Down below, Drew’s black SUV trundles down the bumpy driveway, so I kick-start my bike and tear off down the hill. I tap the side of my helmet twice to call Andreas. “They’re on the move.”
“The drone is activated, and I’ll send you the coordinates.”
“Stay on the line. I’m on the bike tonight.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Shit!” I yell as I come over the last bend and spot Drew’s SUV blocking the exit. I’m going too fast to pull back, and adrenaline surges through my veins as I charge toward them. “I need another route home,” I yell as I calculate my chances of crashing if I go kamikaze over Drew’s car. I don’t see how I’ve got any other option if I want to avoid capture. I’m glad I always dress in black and wear a disguise when on surveillance. At least he won’t be able to make me as long as I can get away from him.
“Stop,” Drew barks out the side window, lifting a gun, and pointing it at me.
“Thena!” Andreas roars in my ear, but I block him and Drew out as I accelerate toward the bump in the path, using it to launch myself up and over the car. A shot rings out as I sail over the SUV, but I ignore it, putting my fate in a higher power and concentrating on a steady landing.
A car horn blares at me as I land on the main road behind the SUV, the vehicle swerving right to avoid hitting me. My heart is thrashing against my rib cage, and a line of sweat rolls down my back as I straighten up and take off. Behind me, the screeching of tires on asphalt confirms Drew is preparing to give chase, and I’ll only have a short window to outrun him.
“I have a route. Keep straight, and then take the second left,” Andreas says with clear urgency.
I put the pedal to the metal and thrust forward, glancing at the mirror as Drew rights his vehicle and drives after me.
I curl the bike low to the ground as I take the left before straightening and driving down the long road, pushing the bike to its limits as I hear the roar of an engine creeping up on me from behind.
“When you get to the junction at the end, take a left,” Andreas says. “It will bring you up along the far road behind the hotel, and there’s a slip road from there to get onto the highway. They won’t risk chasing you where there are other cars and cameras.”
“Fuck!” I snap as a shot comes whizzing by my head. “Please tell me that drone is armed and you can shoot back.”
“I didn’t think we’d need a combat drone. I’m sorry,” he says, and I swerve to the right as another shot comes dangerously close to my left leg.
“How much further?” I shout.
