“I’m fine.” She brushes off my concern as she sets her cup down on the bedside table. “Scoot over.”
I move over, and she climbs onto the bed alongside me. “I didn’t make anything to eat. I figured you wouldn’t be able to stomach it.” She pats my hand. “Any time I’ve been heartsick, I’ve lost my appetite.”
“Yeah. I think I’m the same.” I couldn’t eat after the accident because my stomach was in knots worrying about Garrick, and my stomach has been in knots since my betrayal.
“Let it out, sweetheart.” Nana kisses my temple. “Tell your old Nana what’s troubling you.”
“I kissed Beck,” I say before sipping the hot sweet tea.
“We thought something must have finally happened.”
I perk my head up. “Finally?”
Her wrinkled features soften with pure unadulterated love. “That boy is so in love with you.” Only Nana could call a twenty-eight-year-old man a boy, but we’re all kids to her. She sweeps tangled strands of hair behind my ears. “And you’re so in love with him.”
“I am,” I admit as a single tear leaks out of my eyes. I thought I must have permanently emptied my tear ducts last night, but I guess I was wrong.
“This is a good thing, Little Poppy. You should be happy you’ve found love again.”
“I still love Garrick.” I sniffle. “Kissing Beck, wanting to do more than kiss Beck, feels like the worst betrayal.”
“Garrick isn’t here, sweetheart, but Beck is, and your heart will never lead you astray.”
“It feels wrong to do this to Garrick, but it feels so right with Beck. I’m so confused, and I don’t know what to do.”
“You are not the first girl to love two boys at one time, and no one can tell you what to do. Only you can decide what is best for you. We loved Garrick. He was wonderful to you, but Beck is a wonderful man too, and you’re different with him. I don’t envy you your decision, but it’s time to make one.”
“How, Nana?” I lift my face to hers. “How do I make this decision? It’s impossible.”
“Trust your heart to guide you, Little Poppy. It will lead you along the right path.”
ChapterSixty-Seven
Stevie
“Honey, I’m home!” Hadley calls out just before the front door to our apartment slams shut with a bang. “Stevie? Are you home?”
“In here,” I call out through my open bedroom door.
“It smells like ass in here,” Hadley proclaims, sauntering through the door of my messy bedroom. It looks like a bomb went off, but I can’t find it in me to care.
“Missed you too.” My attempt at humor falls flat.
Hadley has been gone for ten days. She spent the holidays with Mike and his family at their home in Vermont, and then they were skiing in some resort in Ontario, Canada.
She bounces on the bed, wrinkling her nose as she crawls up beside me. “Please tell me you haven’t spent every day since Christmas Day in bed. I knew I should have cut my trip short and come home.”
Beck called Hadley because she phoned me a couple nights after Christmas to see how I was doing. “I would have never spoken to you again if you did that. I’m not your child, Hads. I’m not your responsibility.”
“You’re my best friend. The loyalty feels the same. If you hurt, I hurt.” She lies on her side, propping her head up with one hand. “I knew you’d feel like this when you realized the truth.”
“Did everyone know but me?” I ask, tugging the comforter up under my chin. “And why didn’t you say anything?” It’s a rhetorical question, but I’d still like to hear her admit it.
“It was tempting. Oh, so fucking tempting. But you needed to do this by yourself. You would not have admitted it if I’d said it to you, and it was important you reached this point alone.”
“I was in denial for a reason.”
“I know, babe.” She hugs me to her, and I let her comfort me. After a few minutes of amicable silence, she pulls back a little. “I love you, Stevie, but even I have my limits. When did you last shower?”
