“I’m more open-minded than most, but even I’m struggling with this.”
“Maybe you need to stop fighting it and delve deeper to uncover the hidden truth.”
“What hidden truth?”
“Do you believe in soul mates?”
I nod without hesitation. “Absolutely. But I also believe most people won’t find theirs in a single lifetime.”
A triumphant smile coasts over her mouth. “I wholeheartedly agree. When you think about the billions of people on the planet, it seems like an insurmountable challenge, right?”
“We discussed this very topic at my philosophy class last month. Some of my classmates believe in soul mates. Some don’t. Some believe you can have more than one.”
“What do you believe?”
“I believe there is another person out there who shares half my soul, but the chances of ever meeting him is beyond slim, and I have made my peace with that. I thought I’d found someone I connected with. Someone I could build a life with, and be happy, but I don’t believe in that anymore.” I’m getting dangerously close to voicing the truth hidden in the deepest part of my heart.
“What if I said you have already met him?” she says, and I almost fall off my chair. “Already loved him, in successive lifetimes, because it’s a connection so profound, a love so complete, it cannot die.”
“What?” I blurt, staring wide-eyed at her. Surely, she doesn’t mean…
“In every lifetime, you find one another because the bond is so strong nothing can keep you apart. Not oceans or mountains or timing or other people.” Her eyes drill into mine. “Not age.”
My mouth hangs open, and I’m sure the shock I’m feeling is written all over my face.
“Nothing else matters but the connection you share.” Reaching across the table, she takes my hands in hers. “Search your heart, Kendall. The truth you seek is there. In every lifetime, you battle obstacles and fight through considerable pain and turmoil to find one another again. But find him you have.”
“This isn’t real.” I’m drowning in uncertainty and a whole host of emotions I have no way of dealing with. “You can’t mean what I think you mean.”
“Vander is the other half of your soul, Kendall. It’s up to you what you do with that knowledge.”
2
VANDER
“Where’s Hazel gone?” I ask when my buddy West drops down on the couch alongside me. “God’s Plan” by Drake pumps out of portable speakers, bouncing off the stone walls of the carriage house that is more my home than the lavish mansion at the front of my parent’s property.
“I dropped her off at home. She has a curfew.” Snatching the joint from my fingers, he brings it to his lips. I’m not surprised he’s returned without his girlfriend or that he’s in the mood to party. He’s still reeling over what he learned last weekend. Truth is, I’m pissed too. Though I have a less legitimate right to be.
Behind us, a small crowd of our friends is talking, dancing, and drinking. Friday night sessions are a regular occurrence because I’m the only one of my friends with a private space where we can party without parental interference. My mom is most likely in a drug-and-drink-fueled haze of her own making, passed out in the master suite at the house. Dad is traveling this weekend, which means he’s wining and dining clients and screwing whatever sidepiece is his latest fuck buddy. They rotate as fast as the line at Chick-fil-A, and there seems to be a never-ending supply of gold-diggers and whores willing to take a ride on his dick. He fucking disgusts me, but I hate him for much more than his cheating.
“That’s what happens when you date high-schoolers,” I tell my best bud before finishing my beer and setting the empty bottle on the floor by my feet.
“I love her,” West replies without hesitation.
He was a total player until he fell for his girlfriend, and now he’s a changed man. It’s been over eighteen months, and those two are still crazy in love. I’m happy for my buddy, but it’s not for me.
“Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it,” he adds.
I shake my head, watching him take a long pull on the spliff before I snatch it back. “You know me. I like my women older and to keep it simple.” Dazzling blue eyes and long blonde hair fill my mind’s eye as I take two hits of the joint. Briefly, I close my eyes, savoring the mental picture, before I remember what an asshole I am for thinking about Kendall while West is sitting beside me.
“Aren’t you sick of all the one-night stands?”
I open my eyes and pass the joint back to him. “Casual sex is uncomplicated, and that’s all I have time for.” Dragging anyone into my fucked-up life wouldn’t be fair, and there’s only so much a guy can handle. It’s one of the reasons I don’t fuck girls from school, preferring to find my fuck buddies at UCCS. High school girls equal drama, and I’ve got enough of that in my life. College seniors are more mature and less work. The University of Colorado campus in Colorado Springs is prime hunting ground, and I usually hit up a couple of college bars on Saturday nights with a few of my older buddies from the boxing club. However, it’s been months since I hooked up with anyone, because I’m too fixated on the one woman I want and can’t have to even attempt to fuck anyone else.
We moved to this town a little over three years ago when that prick I call Dad changed jobs. If you ask him, he’ll tell you it was a career move when really it was to avoid a big scandal. I wasn’t happy about the move, at the time, but I actually like it here. I have good friends, found a sport that lets me channel all my pent-up frustration, and commandeered the carriage house on our grounds as my own personal sanctuary-slash-studio.
And I mether.
