“I can’t lose you,” I croak. “Not again.”
“Shush, baby.” He kisses me softly. “You haven’t lost me. I’m hurt, and I need time to process it, but I’m going nowhere.”
I relax at his words, tightening my arms around his neck. “I love you, Leo.”
“I love you too.” He kisses me again before pulling back. “Don’t leave the apartment until you hear from me or Ben. Brando will keep you safe. I’m going to call a locksmith to change the locks because I don’t trust that fucker. Just hold tight until Ben or I come back for you.”
I nod, having no issue agreeing to that. I need to speak to the boys, and I’m exhausted.
I walk Leo to the door, hugging him one last time before I close the door and slide the bolt across it.
Joshua and Caleb are sitting at the kitchen table in silence when I return. I pour myself a coffee and sit down, looking at both of my sons. “I am sorry you had to hear all of that. That you had to find out the things you did in that way.”
“Is it true?” Joshua asks. “Papa has another woman in Chicago?”
I nod.
“How could he do that to you?”
“Love is complicated.” I’m cryptic on purpose because I don’t want to lie to them, but I can’t tell them the truth either. I won’t be the reason they refuse to speak to their father.
“Love is for pussies,” Caleb says. “I’m never falling in love.”
“You don’t know what you’re missing,” Joshua retorts, spoken like a true lovesick teenager. He’s even got the dreamy expression too. His face sobers as he turns to me. “I hate that Papa didn’t show you love.” He squeezes my hand. “I could see it, and it always upset me.”
“Me too,” Caleb says. “And what the fuck is wrong with him? You’re beautiful and kind, and you make the best fucking apple cake.”
I laugh, leaning in to kiss my boys on the cheeks. “You two shower me with love, and that kept me going on tough days, more than you will ever know.”
“I still don’t understand how Papa could cheat on you. It’s disgusting and disrespectful.”
God, I really hope Joshua holds on to those values.
“They all do it,” Caleb says. “It’s what dons do.”
“Not all of them,” I correct him. “Your Uncle Ben is faithful to Sierra, and a lot of made men don’t have affairs or take whores.”
“I’m going to be like Uncle Ben,” Joshua says. “I could never cheat on Bettina.”
Caleb scoffs, rolling his eyes. “She’s a hot piece of ass, bro, but that’s all she will ever be. It’s not like you’re going to marry her.”
Joshua’s face turns red, and I step in before this turns into a fight. “Caleb, don’t speak about your brother’s girlfriend like that. Or any woman, for that matter. I have brought you up to have more respect.”
He rubs his nose, looking a little sheepish. “I respectyou, Mom.”
“I know, sweetheart.” I clasp his hand before I take Joshua’s. “You two have brought me so much joy. I love you both very much, and though things will change, that won’t.”
“I won’t live with him and his slut,” Caleb says, drumming his fingers on the table. “I hate him. I really fucking hate him.”
“I don’t hate him,” Joshua whispers. “He’s my dad. I love him, but how do I forgive him for this?”
“You don’t have to take sides. You can love both of us and be in both our lives. I don’t want either of you carrying any guilt or pressure. This is between your father and me to resolve, and we will resolve it.”
“Are you going to be with Leo now?” Caleb asks.
I nod. “I hope that won’t be an issue. I have loved him since I was a little girl, and now we can finally be together. But you are my sons, and you will remain my priority.”
“I just want you to be happy,” Joshua says.
