Heat crept up Noah’s neck at his son’s observation. “All right, bath time for you. Then we’ll watch a movie. Something quiet and calm?”
“Can I pick?” Eli was already heading for the stairs. “Nothing scary though. Uncle Luke needs happy movies to feel better.”
Later, they settled on the couch with Eli between them, some animated film about dragons playing quietly. Luke draped his good arm across the back of the couch, his fingers occasionally brushing Noah’s shoulder. The casual intimacy of it, the way Eli curled into both of them, felt right in a way Noah couldn’t quite explain.
“Love you,” Eli mumbled, already half-asleep against Luke’s side. “M’glad you’re home.”
Luke’s breath caught. Noah reached across, linking their fingers together, offering silent support. Because that’s what this was—home. Not just the physical space, but the three of them together, building something stronger than fear could break.
“Think we should get him to bed?” Luke asked softly, his thumb tracing patterns on Noah’s hand.
“Probably.” Noah studied his son’s peaceful face. “Though I hate to move him when he’s so comfortable.”
“I can carry him.” Luke started to shift, then winced. “Or maybe not.”
“I’ve got him.” Noah gathered Eli carefully, smiling at his sleepy protests. “Come on, buddy. Bedtime.”
Luke followed them upstairs, hovering in Eli’s doorway as Noah tucked him in. The sight of him there, bruised but present, made something settle in Noah’s chest. This was what he’d been afraid of losing—not just Luke’s love, but the way they fit together as a family.
“Night, buddy,” Luke whispered as Noah kissed Eli’s forehead. “Sweet dreams.”
They lingered in the doorway, watching Eli’s breathing even out. Luke’s good arm slipped around Noah’s waist, drawing him close.
“Thank you,” Luke murmured against his hair. “I hated being away from both of you this week.”
“I’m so sorry,” Noah apologized. He rested his hand on the small of Luke’s back, guiding him to their bedroom.
His steps faltered when he realizedthatwas what he wanted. Not at some abstract point in the future, but now. It was way too soon and impulsive in a way that went against his natural tendencies, but he wanted the security of knowing Luke would be here at the end of the day, that they’d put Eli to bed before retiring totheirroom.
But he’d lost that right the second he told Luke he needed to make Eli his priority, implying Luke never could be.
“You’re awfully quiet all of a sudden,” Luke observed as he struggled to get out of his shirt. Noah slid his hands under the fabric, very gently running them over Luke’s bruised torso. He hissed and winced in pain, but when Noah tried removing his hands, Luke held him in place. “Everything hurts right now, but I don’t want you to stop.”
“I should get your meds and bring them up here.” Taking care of Luke’s physical pain was easier than dealing with the emotional wounds he’d caused.
“I’ve still got about thirty minutes before I can take more. Talk to me.” Luke ducked his head so Noah could slide the shirt over his head and casted arm.
He eased himself onto the mattress and fumbled with his pants. Noah hated watching him struggle to do simple tasks. There was nothing sexual in the way he reached for the closure on his jeans. “We probably should have done this while you were still standing.”
“Probably,” Luke agreed as Noah offered him a hand. He held perfectly still as Noah pushed the fabric down his legs, resting his hand on Noah’s shoulder as he stepped out of them. “Don’t think you’re going to keep distracting me. It’s obvious something’s still bugging you.”
So many things. But Noah didn’t say that. They still hadn’t had a meaningful discussion about what had happened because it would have been unfair to put that on Luke when he was in the hospital.
“If this is about the lake, it’s in the past,” he said as he shuffled up the mattress. Noah stacked a couple of extra pillows behind him.
“It’s not that easy,” Noah admitted as he began removing his clothes. “I hurt you. I hurt all of us. We should talk about that.”
“And I’m sure we will at some point, but it doesn’t need to be this big production. You freaked the hell out, said shit, I reacted, and now we’re going to focus on what really matters. The end.”
Noah sat on the other side of the bed, reaching for Luke’s hand. For someone who swore he wasn’t a relationship guy, Luke seemed pretty decent at it. Noah did feel a bit better after hearing his rationale. “Aren’t you worried I’ll do something like that again?”
“No, I’m not.” Noah wished he had Luke’s confidence in them. “I know this isn’t going to be the last time you have to reconcile being a parent and a partner, but from now on, we will work through those fears together. And if you push, I’ll push back. I’m not sure what else I can do to prove to you that I’m all-in here.”
“Move in with us,” Noah blurted before he even realized what he was saying. But now that the words were out there, he didn’t want to take them back. “I know it’s probably way too soon, and we’re not back on steady ground yet, but I don’t want to spend another night away from you.”
Luke groaned as he turned to his side as much as his battered body would allow. He brushed the backs of his fingers over Noah’s cheek. “If this is you being scared that I’ll run away, don’t be. I want to be here with you and Eli more than just about anything, but that doesn’t mean we need to make a huge step like that.”
“It’s not about being scared.” That might have been a small part, but it had so much more to do with moments like this. Being able to look to his right and see Luke next to him. Watching as Luke kissed his son goodnight. “Thinking I lost you did scare me because I realized I don’t ever want to be without you. I was miserable, and Eli didn’t understand why you weren’t here. Am I still worried something could happen? Sure. But I’m not going to let that dictate my life anymore. If this is what’s going to make all three of us happy, I don’t see a reason to wait some arbitrary length of time before asking you. You’re it for me.”
