“Oh, so you’ll talk to a dog about your problems but not your own mother?”Mycheeks flushed at being caught having a conversation with the dog.Butin my defense, he couldn’t actually tell me whatIwas doing wrong.
WhenIturned to faceMom, my jaw dropped.Iswore she hadn’t been gone more than a minute or two, but she looked like a whole new woman.Herhair was pulled back into a ponytail like usual, but it was sleek instead of messy.She’dput on aChristmassweaterIhadn’t seen before, paired with dark-wash jeans and an adorable pair of boots, andIwas pretty sure she was even wearing makeup. “Whoare you, and what have you done with my mother?”
Sheswatted me on the arm before bending to kiss my cheek. “Irealized it’s time for me to start living.Myonly regret is that you were forced to take care of me for so long whenIwasn’t sure how to keep moving forward.”
“Mom,Iwasn’t forced to do anything.”Iswallowed past the lump in my throat. “Youalways put me first, andIwill never be able to thank you for that.OnceIhad my life settled, it became my turn to do the same for you.Butseriously, you look amazing.MayIask what’s brought on this revelation?”
Shewaved a hand dismissively. “Oh, it’s not one particular thing.ThemoreI’vegotten out of the house, the moreIrealize this place has become a bit of a prison.AndI’mtoo damn young to serve that sentence.”
“Absolutely!”Iheld up a hand to give her a high five, which she returned with a melodic laughIhadn’t heard in far too long.Irose, clipping the leash toBart’scollar before pullingMominto a tight hug. “I’mso proud of you,Mom.Iknow life hasn’t been easy, but you’re right.You’restill young enough to get out there and have fun.Andas an added bonus, you won’t have to worry about me getting into trouble on my own.”
Shepatted my cheek and smiled. “You’readorable if you think a mom will ever stop worrying about her kid.It’spart of the job description and oneIwouldn’t give up for anything.”Shelooped her arm through mine, bending to scratchBart’shead. “Now,Ithink it’s about time for you to tell me what you thought this guy was going to help you clear up.”
Luckily, the drive toHarmonyHousewas relatively short, so there wasn’t time for her to grill me or for me to completely spill my guts.Igave her the basic rundown of what had been happening betweenAnsonand me since the fall.Shelistened silently, nodding at some parts, pursing her lips at others. “Itsounds to me like the two of you know what you need to do, but you’re probably both holding back from the other still.”
“Meaning?”Ieased off the gas asIapproached the stop sign at the center of town.Lookingahead,Inoticed the street was already lined with cars along both sides.Aglance at the clock told meIwas running behind.Hopefully,Ansonand the rest of the crew would forgive me.
“Meaningyou said you both acknowledged that you need to communicate if you’re going to make things work, yet here you are talking to his dog instead of him about your fears.”Momdidn’t scold me often, but when she did, my brain slipped right back to being a kid who worriedI’deventually upset her to the point she wouldn’t love me anymore.Afterall, that’s whatIthought had happened with my dad.Iknew there was nothingIcould do to push her away at this point, but the pain of disappointing her was still very real. “Talkto him.Tellhim what worries you about your relationship.Ithink it’s likely natural to be apprehensive when you know you’re someone’s first same-sex sexual encounter.”
IfIhadn’t been about to pull into a parking spot down the block fromHarmonyHouse,Imight have crashed the car.Thatwas not somethingIexpected her to say.Iplaced a hand on her shoulder, turning to ensure she could see the seriousness in my face asIspoke. “Ilove you, but this is very quickly crossing the line into weird.Iappreciate you looking out for me, butI’mnot talking to you about my sex life.Gotit?”
“I’mjust saying, if you’re serious about him, you need to be willing to show himyour fears and help him through his own.”Sheducked out of my grip and opened her door. “You’vebeen happier sinceThanksgiving, andIwant you to stay that way.”
“Metoo.”Iopened the back door of the car forBart.Hejumped out of the bed-like thingI’dbought for him.AnsonsaidIwas spoiling him, but it was easier for me to focus on driving ifIwasn’t freaking aboutBartfalling off the seat and distracting me as he tried to get back up.Thebed was specifically made for cars, attaching to the backs of the front seats to give him more room to relax.Andfrom the looks of it, he loved it, soIrefused to feel bad. “Pleasedon’t say anything to him.He’sstill working things out in his head and hasn’t come out to anyone.”
“Oh, honey.”Shelet out a heavy sigh. “Becareful.Youdeserve better than being someone’s dirty secret.”
Iquirked an eyebrow, silently daring her to keep going about that.Iwasn’t the only person trying to keep a romantic interest under wraps.EverytimeIasked aboutKeith, she quickly changed the subject, often turning away in hopesIwouldn’t see the way her eyes lit up or the smile she couldn’t stop.
“Youknow whatImean,” she scoffed. “Andit’s different when you’re my age.”
“Youact like you’re an old woman.”
“No,I’msomeone who’s lived.I’vebeen hurt in the past, andI’mtaking things slowly.Ididn’t do that in the past, and while there are thingsIwouldn’t change for the world,Ihave learned from my mistakes.”Iknew she didn’t mean anything by it, but it still stung knowing she was referring to my father.Hewas a massive bag of dicks, but her alluding to getting mixed up with him being a mistake meantIwas too.Andoh, wasIever.
Untilmy mother, he’d been the goodChristianman sitting in the front of the church everySundaywith his wife and kids.Thewife and kids who’d been in his life well before he was seduced by a much younger woman.Andhe’d never let her forget how much he’d given up to stay with her, to make an honest woman out of her.
“Stopthat.”Sheswatted my arm. “That’senough heavy talk for one day.Now, we’re going to go in there and you’re going to officially introduce me to the man who hasyou so twisted in knots you can’t think straight, and when it’s time for me to go home,I’llmanage my own ride so you can enjoy the fruits of your labor with your guy.I’mso proud of you for stepping up and trying to do some good in town.Weneed a lot more people like you and theLangsfordfamily.”
Myheart swelled at her putting me beside them.Despitehow horriblyAnsonand his brothers accepted compliments, there was no denying they were a massive part ofHarmonyGrove’sfuture.
Christmascarols drowned out any chance of conversation the moment we opened the door.Itlooked like most everything was ready to go, butAnsonstood at the front of the room with a clipboard in hand, barking out orders.Thecorner of his mouth tipped up in a grin when our eyes met, and he gave me a small jerk of his head to say hello.Provinghe didn’t always love me more than his daddy,Bartyanked at the leash, trying to break free.Ilet go to save my shoulder, and he headed straight forAnson.Ifollowed, knowing there was far too much happening for people to be tripping over a dog, andEzrawas busy setting up the last of the food.He’dhave a meltdown ifBartattacked the table.
“Hey, you,”Ansonsaid whenIgot closer.Thisdeep into the building, the music was at a much more tolerable level.They’dneed to do something about that before the party started.Otherwise, people wouldn’t be able to mingle and chat the way they should.Hishand came up, then quickly dropped to his side.Itamped down my irritation that he’d caught himself before reaching out to touch me in a way that might be anything but platonic.Luckily, he had the good grace to realize what he’d done. “It’snot you,Ipromise.Ijust…Mymom’s running around somewhere, and this isn’t the time to answer a million questions.”
Oddlyenough, that did make me feel better.Hismom wasn’t nearly as reserved as mine, so if mine had plenty of questions and helpful advice,Icould only imagine whatEleanorwould have to say toAnsonwhen she found out we were dating.Ibrushed my hand along the side of his after making sure there was no one waiting to jump out and catch us. “It’sall good.I’mstill not pressuring you to come out for me.”
“WhenIcome out, it won’t be for you.”Hemotioned for me to follow him, hopefully to a place with a bit more privacy becauseIwas starting to grow uncomfortable, wondering if we’d be interrupted or if someone was within earshot. “I’mgoing to tell my parents and brothers, probably soon, butIjust need to get through tonight first.Andyou have no fucking clue how hard that’s going to be.I’mnot sureI’veseen you dressed up like this before.”
Myoutfit wasn’t much different from whatI’dworn toThanksgiving, but knowingIwould be seeingAnsonthis time,Imight have taken a bit more time rather than just pulling clothes out of the closet.Myblack dress slacks were tighter than the last timeI’dworn them but not so tight in the seatIhad to worry about them splitting.AndI’dpulled out a hunter-green button-down, pairing it with a funChristmastieI’dgotten in a gift exchange a few years back.
Achill shot through my body asAnsonopenly appraised my appearance.Hislips parted, and the tip of his tongue poked out from between his lips.Heleaned in close enoughIcould have kissed him ifIsimply turned my head.ButIdidn’t because one kiss wouldn’t be enough. “It’sprobably a good thingIneed to be careful because it’s taking every bit of self-restraintIcan muster to keep from shoving you up against that wall.IfI’dbeen home when you got ready, we both would have been late.Damn.”
“I’mglad you approved.”Afterquickly checking that we were alone,Icurled my fingers around his tie, yanking his body against mine. “Andthe feeling is most definitely mutual.Whenwe get home tonight,I’mgoing to tell you every single thingI’mpicturing doing to you right now.Doyou think anyone would notice if we left?”
Ansonchuckled.Mygaze followed his hands as he reached down to adjust himself. “They’dabsolutely notice.AndthenI’dhave to tell themIkidnapped and cuffed the city’s friendliest cop to the bed soIcould have my wicked way with him.”
“Ilike the sound of that.NotsureI’dlet you use my department-issued cuffs, but if that’s something you’d like,I’msure we can figure something out.”Itwould have been easy enough for me to slip pastAnson, but it was far more fun to press my body against his asImoved around his broad form.Mydick ached in the confines of my tight slacks, reminding me he wasn’t the only personI’dtortured.Iglanced over my shoulder whenIreached the doorway. “I’mcounting the hours untilIcan strip you out of that neatly pressed outfit and mess you up a bit.”
