I spent a little extra time in the kitchen, wiping down the counters and making sure the sink sparkled. It was partly a way to delay the talk, but also something I’d gotten used to doing when we were here. I liked cleaning for Blake. He worked hard and taking care of him was a way I was able to show how much I adored him. It was strange to realize that was something I would miss when we were apart.
I startled when Blake pressed his body against my back and pulled the rag out of my hand. I tipped my head to the side as he kissed his way along my neck. “You’ve done enough for this morning. Come and sit with me.”
“Yes, Sir.” He kept me caged against the counter as he wrung out the rag and neatly draped it over the edge of the sink. When that was done, he wrapped his arms around my waist, not letting go as we awkwardly walked into the living room.
He sat on the couch, stretching one leg across the cushions and I sank into the space between his legs. I leaned back, closing my eyes, cherishing the comfortable silence that had become a normal part of our days.
He lazily stroked the backs of his fingers over my stomach, never drifting toward the waistband of my shorts. This wasn’t about sex; it was about intimacy and serenity.
“I hope you understand it’s not easy for me to let you go. You’re not the only one who’s gotten used to us being together every minute possible.” The admission was so quiet, I barely heard his words. I wasn’t sure he even realized he’d said them out loud. “But you’re right. This is something you need to do. That way, when you agree to move in with me, both of us will know it’s your decision and not something you’re doing to appease me.”
My heart ached, but it wasn’t the pain of rejection or impending loss I’d felt so many times in the past. I’d been feeling this way for a while now, and it became impossible to hold the feelings inside any longer.
I flipped onto my stomach, shoving my hands under Blake’s body as I rested my head on his chest. “I love you, Sir. I need you to know that. This isn’t anything like what I had in the past. I didn’t realize it was possible to feel for anyone the way I do about you. I’m sorry being this way is hurting both of us. I just… You need to know it’s not because I don’t trust you or I don’t want to be here. I do, but…”
“Shhh, there’s no need to explain yourself,” Blake reassured me. He cradled the back of my head. “It’s my job to help you be the best man you can be, and sometimes that means doing things that don’t feel good. It’s because of how I feel about you that I’m willing to put myself through this pain. You’ve done nothing wrong.”
It didn’t escape me that he hadn’t returned the sentiment, but I didn’t need those three little words from him. He showed that he loved me every minute of every day. That was far more meaningful than hearing words that meant nothing on their own.
“Nothing about our relationship has followed the normal steps,” Blake admitted. I chuckled because he wasn’t wrong. Hell, neither of us had sought out the other the first time we had sex, and yet it was a transformative night. “Now, how about we go over the rules so I can cuddle the hell out of you before I take you home.”
“I like the sound of that.” He held me close as we talked about how often I would be expected to check in with him, what I was and wasn’t allowed to do without his permission, and how he could still take care of me even when I wasn’t staying at his house.
This was what I’d craved all along; a man who trusted me enough to give me freedom, while still showing that he was the one in control. As our conversation shifted to when I could take a weekend off so we could spend a longer chunk of time together without either of us being interrupted, I closed my eyes and focused on the beating of his heart.
* * *
Walkingout of Blake’s home into the oppressive heat of early summer had me rethinking my determination to be independent. By the time we reached his car on the far end of the parking lot, my shirt clung to my back and there was sweat beading on my forehead. I hoped like hell the little window unit the landlord had dropped off for me worked.
Blake intertwined his fingers with mine as he drove across town. Every time he stopped at a light, he looked over at me and the corner of his mouth tipped up.
Finally, I couldn’t take it any longer. “What’s got you so amused over there?”
“You.” He tapped the steering wheel in time with the stereo that played so low I could barely hear it.
“Am I particularly entertaining today?” I squirmed when he narrowed his eyes. My cock thickened at the low growl emanating from his throat. That combination meant I was on my way to earning a spanking, and I couldn’t fucking wait.
Blake released my hand and squeezed the back of my neck, pulling me closer to him. “You can be a brat sometimes. Do you know that?”
“Yep.” I sat up straighter and smirked. “You have no clue what you’ve gotten yourself into. Now that I’m not worried you’re going to leave me if I stick up for myself, you’re going to see a whole new side of me.”
“Is that so?” The tips of Blake’s fingers dug into my neck until it was almost painful. “Is this some sort of bait and switch?”
I was so happy with how this morning turned out; I didn’t feel the slightest twinge of anxiety. For once, I felt…playful. I decided to test my boundaries a bit. “Oh please, it’s not like you were all that hard to get on the hook. You already admitted you wanted me the first time you saw me behind the bar.”
“True, but you sure as hell made me work for it.” He slid his hand over my shoulder and tweaked my nipple. I arched my back, whimpering as his hand slid lower. “You had me convinced I’d lost any game I used to have.”
My teeth clamped around my bottom lip as the tips of his fingers danced over the outline of my cock. He was tormenting me and, given the smug expression on his face, he damn well knew it, too.
“You have…plenty of game…Sir.” My words faltered as he cupped my balls, giving them a quick squeeze.
I glanced around, unsure if I was checking that no one could see us or that I was hoping they could. I was far more interested in exhibitionism than I thought I’d be, partly because I wanted the world to know how well Blake could take care of my needs. I threw my head back as he stroked my erection with the heel of his palm.
“Please, Sir. I need to come.”
“And you will, just as soon as I get you safely inside your apartment,” he informed me.
If I had any doubts how evil Blake could be, he dispelled them on the drive. As it turned out, today was the day he chose to take the scenic route, showing me where he’d grown up, his elementary and high schools, his first job, and where he’d realized vanilla sex wasn’t for him. As sweet as it would have been some other day, it sucked after he demanded I unzip my jeans and pull myself out for him.
