1
Danny
Some nights were easierthan others to remember why I thought getting a job at a kink club was a great idea. In my defense, when I stumbled across theNow Hiringsign in the window, I’d been at rock bottom, and it felt like a sign confirming I hadn’t screwed up my entire life by using part of the money Michael had given me as a parting gift to buy a bus ticket halfway across the country.
Tonight was most definitelynotone of the easy nights. It seemed like everyone was here with their partners, which was sort of the point, but that only highlighted the fact that I was adrift. I was in this odd place where I didn’twantto find a new Dom, but I still craved the way I felt when I was with someone I could trust. Damn Michael for making me realize I was a shit judge of character.
“Can I get two bottles of water?” I shook off my internal pity party and glanced up to see a perfectly average looking man in front of me. Maybe that sounded harsh, but there wasn’t anything remarkable about him. He had a face that was easily forgettable when you worked with the public and saw hundreds of people every week. And yet, there was something about him that rendered me speechless.
I was officially losing my mind.
I blinked a couple of times and offered him a weak smile. This wasnotthe way to make a good impression on the bosses if they were lurking somewhere watching me.
“Sorry about that,” I apologized as I pulled the bottles out of the ice well.
“No problem.” His fingertips lingered against mine for a moment longer than was comfortable. Rather than grabbing the waters and going back to his group, he slid onto the stool. “You look upset tonight.”
Shit. That wasn’t good. Bartenders were supposed to be sounding boards, not the ones needing to vent about their personal problems. I shook my head. “I’m good.”
“It’s not healthy to lie about your emotions, Danny,” the man scolded. “You don’t know me but if you ever decide you’re ready to stop lying to yourself, let me know.”
“Yes, Sir.” My gaze dipped to the bar. I wasn’t sure what it was about this guy, but I felt compelled to break eye contact. On instinct, I crossed my arms behind my back and widened my stance. My heart raced. I dragged my tongue across the seam of my lips, wondering when the air had gotten so dry in here. Remembering I had a job to do, I cleared my throat. “Can I get you anything else?”
“Nothing right now.” I flinched when I felt his finger under my chin. The pressure forced me to look at him again. “The only thing I want from you is a smile, but not until it’s a genuine one. Remember, you’re not an island here.”
“Thank you, Sir.” My heart raced as if I was coming to life after a long nap. A random guy shouldn’t have this sort of control over me.Couldn’thave this effect on me.
As he walked away, I wiped down the bar and started organizing the bottles in the well. Because of the nature of Club DeSires’ business model, we wound up cleaning off dust more than sticky drips from nights spent pouring drinks at a rapid-fire pace. They stillofferedalcohol, but if you were drinking, you weren’t allowed to play. I busied myself, trying to keep my attention from drifting back tohim.
I ignored the warm, heavy feeling building in the pit of my stomach a while later when he approached an attractive sub. Of course he wasn’t here alone. Nobody was. And besides, he’d orderedtwobottles of water, not just one for himself. He cupped the sub’s cheek, then uncapped the water before handing it to him. The sub never broke the Dom’s gaze as he sipped the water before allowing himself to be led over to one of the leather couches. When the sub kneeled in front of the couch, the Dom gave him a quick nod and another approving smile.
My gut churned with jealousy. Fuck, I missed having someone look at me that way.
You need to learn to stand on your own two feet, Danny.Michael’s parting words thumped around inside my head. Letting myself get so caught up in the approval of another person was exactly what had led me to trying to completely reinvent myself. The freedom to hand over the reins to someone else wasn’t worth the pain it caused when that person got tired of having to make all of the decisions.
No, I didn’t need to be the pretty sub looking up at my Dom like he’d just hung the moon. Been there, done that, had the scars on my heart to prove it.
The club started filling in anticipation of the night’s exhibition. The small stage at the other side of the room was set with a massage table and a tray filled with instruments. My dick twitched as I thought about what they’d all come to see. It sounded painful, but also erotic as hell.
The man from earlier stepped onto the dark stage, picking up the instruments that had been laid out. During a lull in orders, I allowed my eyes to drift closed, imagining I was his volunteer for the night, my dick jutting into the air. I shivered when I thought about the sizzle of energy that had shot through my body just from passing contact. How strong would that jolt be if I was at his mercy, and he was touching my cock?
There was a new bartender working with me tonight and, so far, he was running circles around me. If I didn’t watch myself, I’d be back to pounding pavement, trying to find a job so I didn’t feel like Michael was still supporting me even in his absence. I balled my hands into tight fists, fighting the images of the stranger having me under his control. There was no point in wishing for things that would never happen.
Once the exhibition started, Colin and I had time to restock the bar. Because this was a play night, we weren’t moving much alcohol but there was still plenty to be done. “Do you want to start filling from the backstock and I’ll run to grab some cases to replenish?”
“Yeah, whatever you need. Do you want me to grab ice, too?” he asked as he started pulling partial cases out of the cabinets beneath the back bar. I envied him the easy grace with which he settled into a new role. I wasn’t sure I’d ever feel that comfortable in my own skin.
“Nah. One of us needs to stay behind the bar in case anyone needs a drink.” Besides, Ineededto get the hell out of this room and clear my head. Listening to that man’s rich voice explaining how he was manipulating his sub’s body and instructing the Dom’s in the room on how to do it safely, wasn’t going to help my situation at all. If that meant doing the grunt work that would usually be saved for the rookie, so be it. “If you need help, flag John down. He’ll send Mav over to help you out.”
John and Mav both working tonight was a blessing and salt in the wound. They were still in the honeymoon phase of their own relationship, and whenever Mav wasn’t busy weaving his way through the seating areas serving guests, he was perched on John’s stool at the door. Tonight, he wore an obscenely short, pleated skirt that I knew gave his Daddy easy access to tease him. It wasn’t exactly professional, but no one said anything as long as the work got done.
Seeing them together…
Nope. I needed to quit wallowing in my own pathetic relationship status. I wasn’t going to mope anymore.
The Lodge side of the club was packed, but not as painful to my already bruised psyche. Being the more vanilla side of the club, there were far more singles than couples hanging out. A group of Littles went running through the room playing a game of tag. It was easy to pick out the newbies; they were the ones confused at the sight of a group of grown men—and a couple of women—dressed like children. While that wasn’t something I’d ever be interested in, it was cute.
“Hey, how are things on the dark side?” Corey asked as I approached the bar. Unlike John and Mav, Corey and his partner worked opposite shifts most of the time, so someone was always home with Corey’s daughter. It was sweet, and it meant I didn’t have toseehow in love they were. That made them some of my favorite people I worked with.
