I’d bet Ryan had one of those fancy tankless water heaters that never ran out of hot water. And water pressure. I’d suck him off ten times a day if he had a showerhead that felt like the high-pressure spray at the car wash.
“You’re not going to ask how it went?” Through the fogged-up glass door, I could see Ryan leaning against the vanity. The man seriously needed to realize that you didn’t lean on anything in our apartment. The management company was all about doing as little as possible without drawing fines for building code violations. I wouldnotmiss this place.
Funny, twenty-four hours ago, I was still insisting I wasn’t ready to move, but here I was thinking aboutwhenI left, notif. I’d have to talk to Mav to let him know my plans were changing. Our lease wasn’t up for a few more months, but I didn’t want to renew.
“Nah, I figure you’ll tell me if there’s something I need to know,” I responded, feigning a casualness I certainly didn’t feel. Deegan could be a stubborn bastard when he wanted to be, and I didn’t believe for a second, his acceptance the night of his wedding would last.
“Come on, brat.” Ryan reached in and turned off the water before holding out a towel for me. When I tried snatching it from him, he held on tighter and narrowed his eyes. “Let me take care of you. I’ve been horribly deprived since I went home.”
“Well, then maybe we’ll have to find a way to keep you from suffering in the future,” I teased. I wouldn’t admit how nice it felt having him kneel before me, drying every droplet of water from my skin.
“Don’t toy with me, boy,” he warned me.
“Who says I’m playing around?” It was almost comical how Ryan lost his balance and crashed into me. I reached down, helping him off the ground. “Man, if I knew you’d react like that, I would have waited to say anything. If I’d lost my balance, I would have cracked my head on the faucet, then you’d have to nurse me back to health from a concussion and a gaping head wound.”
“Such a little drama queen.” As Ryan stood, he reached around and swatted my ass. “I ought to take you over my knee for making me put you in danger.”
“How in the hell is this my fault?” I jumped out of the way when he tried swatting me again. “You know, I’ve heard balance is one of the things that goes to hell as you age.”
It was fucked, but this was the first time Ryan and I had really played around without any stress between us. He was relaxed, like he hadn’t been the week at the resort, and I finally trusted that we were both committed to making things work. I liked joking with him, almost as much as I liked fucking around with him.
“I’ve got your age right here,” Ryan scoffed as he cupped his dick. “Then again, I’m so old I’m not sure I’ll be able to get it up. Will you still love me if I can’t fuck you until you forget your name?”
I scratched my chin, pretending to think for a moment. He narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. He was cute when he was trying to mean mug me. I draped my arms over his shoulders and pressed my naked, still damp body against his. “You know there’s nothing that could make me love you less, not even a wilted, wrinkly dick.”
“That’s either super sweet or disturbing as hell, but I’m not sure which.” Ryan moved out of the way when I stepped up to the mirror. I’d gotten lax about shaving, too busy throwing myself a pity party, but now that Ryan was here, I wanted to look my best for him. “I’ll find you something to wear while you get ready.”
“I thought we were hanging around the apartment today,” I grumbled. Mav had texted in the middle of the night to let me know he was crashing at a buddy’s house for a few nights to give us some private time. I’d intended to make every minute of our privacy count, but apparently Ryan had other plans.
“Yep, but that was before you blackmailed me into calling Deegan,” he informed me. My mouth watered when he leaned against the door frame. “Haley freaked when she heard I was in town, so apparently we’re spending the day with them.”
Leave it to Deegan to fuck up my plans. But that wasn’t fair; I was the one who made Ryan call. Even though I didn’t agree to him calling it blackmail, I could see how he might have felt like it was.
“I didn’t realize you and Haley were close,” I choked out, trying to find something to say that wouldn’t make me sound like a petulant turd. This was my fault, plain and simple. Now, I had to pretend there was nothing I wanted to do more than hang out with my brother and my boyfriend, who were trying to repair their friendship that I’d helped fracture.
“We’re not, but apparently the two of you have been royal pains in her ass.”
Fair enough. I tried to not put her in the middle of things, but it was tough because she’d always been the person I talked to about my shit. I didn’t bother taking relationship problems to Mav; he was allergic to anything more than a one-night stand.
“And when we get back here, we’re going to talk about when you’re at least coming out to visit me,” Ryan warned me. I was surprised he hadn’t insisted that we spend the night packing my shit so we could drive across the country. It was something small, but it proved to me that he was trying to respect my need to do things in my own time.
“I don’t think I need to visit,” I told him. His face went as white as the towel I scrubbed over my face, and I realized how that might have sounded. I tossed the towel onto the vanity and threw myself into his arms. “Hey, I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just saying that wherever you are is where I want to be. It might take a bit to get everything in order, but you flying out here made me realize I need to be willing to meet you halfway.”
“Are you sure, baby?” Ryan’s tight embrace said he really hoped I wasn’t about to tell him I was kidding. “Moving isn’t exactly a halfway sort of move. This is a big step and, as much as I want you with me, I don’t want you to feel pressured.”
“And that’s exactly why it’s time for me to pull my head out of my ass. You keep going out of your way to make sure I’m happy and taken care of. It’s time for me to do the same for you.” I was so damn proud of myself; my voice didn’t even crack as I said it. The raw vulnerability I felt diving into this with him was nothing compared to standing naked in front of him while he was fully clothed.
“Then that’s what we’ll talk about later.” He laced his fingers with mine and pulled me across the hall to my room. My hopes that he wanted to celebrate with a quickie were quickly dashed when he guided me to the bed and then started rummaging through my dresser to find something for me to wear.
If letting him dress me wasn’t a sign of how much I loved him, I wasn’t sure anything was. That was a level of trust no one achieved.
16
Ryan
Tanner tellingme he wouldn’t consider moving to be with me until I fixed things with Deegan was an eye-opening moment. Yes, he was my boy, and I was Daddy, but that didn’t mean he was a pushover who would hesitate to tell me what was on his mind. And it was exactly the threat I needed to pull my head out of my ass.
He was right; I’d been avoiding Deegan since shortly after the wedding. I was riding the high of a new relationship, he was still in the honeymoon phase of his marriage, and I didn’t want both of us crashing to reality by talking about all the shit we hadn’t addressed. There’d been a void across the line where we used to shoot the shit every weekend, and I’d made the decision to stop picking up the phone. When he hadn’t bothered calling me, I figured he had the same thought. If we didn’t talk, neither of us could say something we couldn’t take back.
