I’d never thought about it, but now that I saw all the boys together, I wanted what they had. I’d liked it more than I should have when John sent me upstairs to change. Unlike back home, he wasn’t doing it because I embarrassed him, but because he wanted me to be comfortable. And I was. Mostly.
It would have been better if I’d changed into a pair of lounge pants because I seriously regretted wearing tight jeans. Every time John looked at me, my dick throbbed. My insecurity from earlier had vanished as soon as John had pulled me into the chair with him and held me as he praised me.
I wanted to fast forward to the end of the night when he and I could talk, and maybe we could say goodnight with a kiss before he walked out the door.
That was something else that was out of character for me. As a way to keep myself safe, I’d never let myself imagine a romantic goodbye at the end of a date. I’d found that sticking to one-night stands, with men who didn’t care what I looked like as long as they shot their load, kept me from getting hurt. If I didn’t give more than one night to anyone, they couldn’t get attached enough they thought they could change me.
But something about the way John looked at me, said he meant it when he claimed I was perfect as I am. It might even be fun to see just how far he’d let me go.
“Yoo-hoo, Earth to Maverick.” Corey snapped his fingers in front of my face. I batted his hand away. He chuckled, looking the same direction I’d been staring. “If you keep that up, Sam’s gonna have to get you a bib to soak up all the drool.”
I wiped the corner of my mouth, only to find it dry. It wouldn’t have surprised me in the least if I’d been caught salivating over John. He was everything I feared and craved, all at the same time. I was a sucker for edgy guys, who looked big enough to snap me in two, but again, I played it safe. There was a faint hint of silver at his temples when the light caught his hair just right, and I wanted to massage my fingers over his closely trimmed scalp.
“You should talk to him,” Sam insisted. “He can’t stop looking at you, either.”
“But you said he’s not gay,” I reminded him. Hearing my friend confirm my suspicions had been a minor damper on the fire burning inside of me, but, then again, Sam hadn’t felt the way John’s body had reacted to mine when I was in the chair with him or earlier up in the hall. He also didn’t know how John’s body had sagged against the wall after I’d sucked him off.
“No, I saidI didn’t knowhe was into guys,” Sam corrected me. “But you’d have to be stupid to ignore the fuck-me eyes he’s flashing you.”
“I don’t want complications,” I argued. “I should do what I came here to do before I start thinking about getting laid. I need to find a job so I can eventually move out.”
“And I already told you, we have plenty of openings if you want one of them,” Sam countered. Working at the bar seemed like an even worse decision now that John was in the picture. Not only could it be too much time for Sam and I to be around one another, but what if John wasn’t interested? “Stop obsessing over all the ways it could go wrong. I want you to think of how right it could be.”
“Why do I get the feeling you aren’t only talking about the job?” I popped the last chicken nugget into my mouth and gathered all of the empty plates. Cleaning up for everyone gave me a viable excuse to go near the bar, where I could hear what the Daddies were talking about. “Will it be enough if I tell you I’ll think about it? The job and…the other?”
“That’s good enough for now.” Seeming pleased with himself, Sam wandered over to Theron, who held out a wet wipe for his fingers. The strangest part of the night so far—other than the way I’d instinctively obeyed John—was seeing Sam straddle this line between little and big. He had no issues carrying on adult conversations, but he still gravitated toward the dynamic he and Theron shared.
I slowed, considering how I’d feel if that was something John wanted. My steps faltered completely, when I realized I’d leaped straight past considering giving John a chance to fantasizing about him being my first Daddy.
* * *
I wokeup to someone gently shaking me. I pulled the blanket over my head and flipped onto my stomach. It had been a long day and I wanted them to leave me sleep. I was comfy, even if I was on the floor.
“Sweetheart, let’s get you up to bed.” I smiled; happy he was still here. “Come on, princess. It’s time to sleep.”
“Already sleeping,” I grumbled as I curled into a tight ball.
“If you’re a good boy, I’ll tuck you in and give you back rubs,” he offered. I hummed my approval of that suggestion. Without opening my eyes, I draped my arms over his shoulders. He stood, lifting me as if I didn’t weigh anything. With his hands under my butt, supporting me, I wrapped my legs around his waist. “Are you doing a koala impression, baby?”
I loved hearing his pet names for me. They fit so much better than my real name. I kissed the base of his neck. “Yes, Daddy.”
“Mmm, I like hearing you say that, but maybe we should back up a step,” he suggested. I held on tighter as he carried me up the stairs. Sam and Theron were in the kitchen talking. They said goodnight to me, and I just waved. “You’re too sleepy for big decisions right now, and that’s a huge one.”
“But you said we’d talk tonight,” I whined. He was supposed to tell me that he wanted me, and then I was going to walk him to the door and kiss him goodnight. Then, I was going to stand at the window and wave until he disappeared down the street.
“That was until I realized how worn out you were from your big day.” He kissed the side of my head, then adjusted his hold on my butt so he could secure me with one hand. He didn’t turn on the light after opening the bedroom door. It was a bit clumsy when he drew back the comforter and laid me on the bed. “I don’t want us to rush things and wind up resenting one another. I’ve never done this before, so it might take me time to get it right.”
I rolled onto my side. “Okay. But will you stay with me for a little while at least? I was looking forward to cuddling with you while we talked.”
“Yeah, I can do that.” He didn’t sound so sure of himself now. I could hear him cracking his knuckles—gross—as he breathed heavily next to the bed, almost like he was trying to figure out what happened next. I heard him start saying something, but he never even got a full syllable out. He huffed a few more times. “Would it be okay if I help you change for bed?”
Well, that had every inch of me wide awake. My eyes popped open and I stared up at him. “What happened to taking it slow?”
“We are,” he assured me. “I’m not asking as a way to get you naked so I can take advantage of you. I’m just thinking you won’t be very comfortable sleeping in those jeans, and if you keep your hoodie on, you’re going to wake up with a crick in your neck.”
Oh. Okay. That was…really freaking thoughtful. I was tempted to tell him that I usually slept in my birthday suit, but that might be pushing my luck tonight. He hadn’t said so, but it seemed that being in another man’s bedroom was already a step he was struggling to take.
I sat up, intending on getting a pair of shorts and a tank top out of my suitcase. John stilled me with a hand on my chest. “Tell me where you keep your pajamas and I’ll get them.”
