“The league took a stand last year, but a lot of people still see the commissioner’s press conference as little more than lip service,” she continued. “They brought in a gay former player and gave him a fancy title, but beyond that, little has been done to foster an accepting environment.”
“Oh, come on, Rebecca! Are we talking about the majors here or are you trying to build a better school for underprivileged kids? An ‘accepting environment’? Are you kidding me?” Stu slapped his hand down on the desk. “No matter what the league had someone write up as an official policy, that’s not going to mean a damn thing if the rest of the team is uncomfortable showering in the same locker room as a gay man. They’ll be worried about whether or not he’s going to make a pass at them or check them out.”
It had been a shitty morning, and that was the final straw. I lurched out of my chair quick enough that Stu flinched, thinking I was coming over the desk for him. Instead, I planted my hands on edge of the desk and leaned in so I knew he’d hear me.
“Not once in all my years on the team have I ever checked out another player. I’m intelligent enough to know the difference between picking up tricks at a bar and doing myjob,” I snarled. I looked back to see Angel and Rebecca both smirking, and I had an idea. “Tell me, Stu… when we walk out of the office, will you be staring at Rebecca’s backside? Is it difficult for you to sit here without staring at her cleavage?”
“Absolutely not!” Stu responded emphatically. Now, his face was beet red and the vein near his temple throbbed as he stood, mirroring my position so our faces were inches apart. “That would be completely inappropriate and I’d lose my job if she filed a sexual harassment complaint.”
I sat back in my seat, crossing my arms over my chest as I tried not to smile.
“Seems to me you just made my point for me,” I stated calmly. “Besides the fact that I’ve hadyearsof watching what I do in the locker room because I never wanted anyone to get too close to the truth, it would be career suicide for me to openly ogle other players simply because my secret is out there now. Why is it that you think you’re capable of being professional, and yet you assume I won’t be?”
“Well–I–shit, I guess I didn’t look at it that way,” Stu admitted, shaking his head. “I can’t guarantee how the guys are going to handle this news, but I’ll take your word for it that nothing changes when you’re here. If any of the guys take issue with this, I will make sure it’s known that management has your back.”
“Thank you, sir.” It didn’t go without notice that he was glaring at Rebecca the entire time he spoke. It wasn’t thathewas okay with my sexuality, he was simply doing what needed to be done to keep the suits upstairs from blowing a gasket.
“As much as I’d love to sit here and chat all day, Angel and I do have a game to prepare for,” Stu said dismissively. “Rebecca, until you have a statement prepared, I’ll instruct everyone to refrain from commenting on this story any more than they may have already. Tucker, in light of everything that’s happening, I think it’d be for the best if you take the day off.”
“Yes, sir.” I tried to ignore feeling as though I was being punished over something I couldn’t control. He was right; my presence at the park would only detract from what truly mattered.
However, there was one thing I had to do before heading home. I stood to follow Stu to the door. “Sir, if it’s okay with you, I think I need to talk to the guys before I leave. I’m sure some of them will have already heard, but I’d rather they have the opportunity to hear this directly from me.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” Angel agreed. “Sean’s been an important part of our team for years now, and they’ll respect him more if he addresses them directly.”
“I’d prefer to not do this before a game, but I don’t know that we have a choice. Come on, most of the guys should be getting ready by now.” Stu sighed, but held his shoulders rigid. It wasn’t much different than his stance when we walked into the press room after a shellacking.
The four of us walked down the corridor to the clubhouse. Stu had called down and asked that everyone meet us there in five minutes. When my teammates saw me walk in behind them, a few turned to look away and I knew that they all knew. Jason quirked an eyebrow before giving me a curt nod. This simple gesture reassured me that not everyone would turn their backs on me after today. Stu whistled to get everyone’s attention.
“Before we head out to warm up, Tucker has something he needs to say to everyone. I’m sure you’ve already heard the rumor that was started at this morning’s press conference. Sean wanted to give everyone an opportunity to clear the air so we can get back to playing ball,” Stu explained.
An eerie hush fell over the room, and I felt everyone watching me. It was likely some of them were running through every interaction we’d had, trying to see if they’d missed the signs. And the assholes of the bunch glared, and I imagined they were trying to figure out if I’d checked out their junk in the showers.
As if. Straight men really needed to get over their shit. I had the sexiest, bravest, stupidest man in the world waiting out there for me somewhere. Why would I want their ugly asses when I could fall into bed with Mason?
He motioned for me to step forward. That annoying lump formed in my throat and I wished Mason were here to help me. Unlike me, he had no problem saying what was on his mind. The longer I went without speaking, the louder the whispers grew, to the point Coach let out a shrill whistle and scolded everyone to pipe down.
“Guys, there’s no easy way to say this,” I started, wiping my sweaty palms against my thighs. “This morning, a reporter asked a question I’ve been trying to avoid for years. If you have something to say about anything you might have heard on your way in today, I trust that you guys know me well enough to know you can say it to my face.”
“Damn, Tucker, whatever’s going on spill it already!” My head snapped up and I saw Drew Jackson smirking at me. Hopefully his cocky expression wouldn’t morph into disgust when I finished my thought.
“Sorry, this is tougher than I thought it’d be.” A few of the guys added their supportive comments as I took a deep breath. It reminded me that we were more than just teammates. We were a family, and even if they didn’t like what I was about to say, they’d find a way past it. “Thanks, it means a lot to me to hear you guys tell me I’m freaking over nothing, but this is a really big fucking deal for me.”
I looked around the room to see everyone watching me with rapt attention, even the guys who were doing everything they could to avoid direct eye contact. I was screwing this up. “Fuck, okay…I’m sure you’ve all noticed that I’m one of the few single guys on the team. Hell, I know a few of you’ve made a pastime out of giving me shit about it. The truth is, I’m not single, and I’m quite possibly happier than I’ve ever been.”
“Does anyone else hear the closet door creaking open?” one of the outfielders quipped, causing a few snickers. And then the room went completely still as my teammates realized I wasn’t disputing what he said. I hadn’t once tried to deny what they already knew thanks to some sports reporter hoping to make a name for herself.
“Is that what this is all about?” Jackson asked. I cracked my knuckles and risked a look around the room.
“Yeah, I guess it is. Like I said, I know some people are going to be pissed off, but I’m the same person today that I was yesterday,” I insisted. I looked from one set of eyes to the next, trying to find anyone who was upset by my news. Most of their expressions ranged from impassive to supportive. That was far better than I’d expected. “Who I go home to hasn’t changed my game on the field so far, and it won’t now. And because I know someone would be stupid enough to say it, no, I don’t want a single one of you ugly fuckers. If I did, I’d have let you know by now.”
It was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. A few guys stormed out of the room, but most of them were too shocked to move.
“Alright boys, as much as I’d love to sit around shooting the shit all day, there’s work to be done,” Coach hollered, breaking the silence. “As Tucker said, if you have something to say, you will say it to him or to me. But know this, the Mavericks organization stands behind his decision, and we’ll do everything we can to make it known that his sex life is no more interesting than any of you other assholes. There will be a zero tolerance policy for any bullshit retaliation. Sean has made it abundantly clear that who he is off the field won’t change his performance on the field, and I trust him to hold to that.”
With that, we were dismissed to the field. Coach whistled again before we reached the doors. “One last thing before we head out there today. I shouldn’t have to remind you of this, but if I see the words ‘an anonymous source reports’ anywhere online regarding this, I will find the leak and the punishment will be painful in more ways than one.”
Drew hung back while the rest of the guys left with little more than a quick wave. I supposed that had gone better than I could have asked for, because no one had made any outwardly bigoted comments. It remained to be seen if that was because it didn’t matter or if they really didn’t care.
