Sam
The end of my final semester of school was just around the corner and I felt like I was crawling out of my skin. I should have been ecstatic because my life was better than I’d ever dreamed possible, but I felt like the bubble we lived in was about to burst. Until now, I hadn’t had to worry about slipping up when I was talking about Daddy. The only people I really talked to were the guys at work, and a few friends I’d made online or at the club. They were either in the lifestyle or had known about my curiosity forever, so they didn’t think twice if I slipped up.
But now, I was gearing up for a series of family visits. I hadn’t even told my parents about Theron, which meant I had to come clean because I didn’t want him stay away for the sake of my sanity. Logically, I knew I had nothing to worry about when they found out I was dating someone, but I knew my mom would worry. Theron was older than me. We’d only been dating a few months and we were practically living together. She’d be concerned that I was going to lose focus on getting a job after graduation. To her, working at a bar—even if I was in management—wasn’t a career for someone who had a college degree.
She was totally chill about most things, but she worried I wasn’t living up to my potential. I disagreed. Jack was one of the best mentors a guy could ask for, he accepted me as I was, and he pushed me beyond my comfort zone. I had ownership of something, and it was a heady feeling. I was even considering inviting my parents to the bar—during the day when I wouldn’t have to worry about them seeing anything none of us wanted to think about them witnessing—so what I’d been doing was more than vague explanations.
Maverick0808: Dude! Where in the hell are you? If you don’t respond to me, I’m going to think that Daddy you found was actually a serial killer and your body is rotting at the bottom of a ravine somewhere.
Mav was being dramatic, but when I scrolled through our messages, I felt like he was justified. I’d been in a frenzy between work, school, and Daddy that it had been three weeks since we chatted. When you were used to spending part of everyday talking to a person and they ghosted you shortly after finding a boyfriend, a good friend would probably get nervous.
Sammy1995: Hey, sorry. Things are nuts here.
Maverick0808: Doesn’t make it okay for you to ghost me. I was worried about you. Asshole.
Yeah, I owned my status as a complete asshole.
Sammy1995: That wasn’t my intention. Promise.
Maverick0808: So, I’m assuming things are going well, since you haven’t gotten online to bitch about how miserable you are?
Sammy1995: I’m not that bad! It’s not like I only talk to you when I want to complain.
Maverick0808: No, but you were mopey for a while.
As much as I wanted to catch up with Mav, Daddy was going to be home soon, and I still wasn’t done with my homework. And Ihadto call my mom, otherwise I’d be officially out of time. I almost unloaded on Mav but deleted the message before I sent it.
Sammy1995: Not ghosting, but I have to finish up this paper. It’s due by the end of the weekend and I have to work.
Maverick0808: Man, I do not miss that shit. You should be just about done, yeah?
Sammy1995: This paper and one more. Then… FREEDOM! I’d invite you to the graduation party Daddy’s throwing me but that might be weird.
It would definitely be strange to a lot of people that Mav was my best friend in the world and we’d never met. I’d shared a few pictures of myself with him, but he’d never returned the favor. Once upon a time, I’d tried badgering him into showing me what he looked like, but after it put a temporary rift between us, I’d quickly backed off. It wasn’t worth it.
Maverick0808: Was that a backhanded invite?
Sammy1995: No, because life is going good and I’m not a fan of rejection.
Maverick0808: You used to be such an optimist. I’d ask what happened, but I think we both know. But you don’t have to deal with that shit anymore.
Maverick0808: Do it, Sam.
Sammy1995: Do what?
Maverick0808: Man, if I have to tell you, then it feels like I’m trying to invite myself and that’s just sad.
I re-read the message a few times. This was a huge step in our friendship, and the selfish, insecure piece of me wasn’t sure I actually wanted to invite him. It wasn’t that I didn’t want him there, but I wasn’t sure what I’d do if I he came and the close friendship we had online couldn’t survive the leap into real life.
Maverick0808: You don’t have to. I was just messing with you.
But I didn’t think he was. I jumped when I heard the garage door opening and shut the lid of my laptop. Theron wouldn’t be angry with me for talking to a friend, but I’d told him I was coming home to work, not to screw around.
I opened the door and stepped down into the garage. “Hi, Daddy.”
“What’s wrong, baby?” He grabbed his messenger bag off the front seat and hurried to my side. I let out of sigh when he wrapped his arms around my chest and cradled my head against his shoulder. “Rough day?”
“Not really.” He’d probably point out I was overreacting if I told him I was frustrated because I felt like one of my friends had given me the best gift ever, but I was afraid to accept it. Plus, I hadn’t told him anything about Maverick, and now that it was at the front of my mind, I worried he’d think there was something else going on between us because I’d tried to keep him my little secret. It wasn’t about that; it was because a lot of people had told me that online friends weren’t real friends.
