“And the room at Jayden’s apartment? What was that about?”
Okay, so maybe I wasn’t going to ignore the elephant in the back seat. “IfI drop out of school, I won’t have a choice but to move out of the dorms. He wanted me to have a place to land if that happens. But right now, that’s a huge if. I wouldn’t do something like that without talking to you about it first. And as tempted as I am sometimes to just throw in the damn towel, I know that might not be the best idea, either.”
Trevor stared through the windshield, his breathing slow and steady, his thoughts contained within his mind. As the silence dragged on, I wanted to shake him and ask him to say something, anything, to reassure me we’d be okay if I dropped out. I got my wish. Sort of.
“I think withdrawing would be a shitty idea,” he said frankly. “Knowing you, you think this will be a little time off while you figure out what you want to do with your life. What happens when you get so caught up in the real world that you never go back to school? Would you regret this decision a decade down the road when you know what you want to do but feel trapped by this single bad decision?
“I’m sorry I’ve been so obsessed with my own classes that I didn’t know you were having these thoughts,” he apologized, turning in his seat to face me. “I’m sorry I haven’t been there to help you when you were struggling.”
“It’s not your job to be my personal tutor.”
“No, but I’ve always helped you out. Not because I had to, but because I want to.” Trevor laced our fingers together and lifted them to his mouth, kissing each finger. “You have an amazing mind, but it’s never worked the same way a lot of people’s do. I’m sure you have dreams you’ve never told anyone about, not even me, because you don’t think they’ll make your parents proud of you. They’re going to love you no matter what, and they’ll respect you for carving your own path, whatever that looks like.”
I sat and thought a minute about what I’d do if I put all the sensible suggestions out of my mine. Theater. I loved anything to do with theater. But I’d always been told that was a hobby, not a career.
When I’d checked out UNCW, it was their drama department that drew me in. Last semester, I’d taken an introductory level class and I’d had a blast, even if the course content had been mundane at times. This semester, I’d followed through on the promise to myself to focus on my gen eds and I was miserable. Damn, if only I’d talked to Trevor about this sooner.
I practically launched myself across the seat. My mouth crashed against Trevor’s, my tongue pressed into his mouth when he gasped in surprise. His hands pushed beneath my hoodie and he began massaging my back. Moans filled the cabin of the Jeep as I pushed him against the door, devouring his mouth.
We were so caught up, neither of us noticed the beam of headlights entering the park. We jumped apart at the rap of knuckles against the window. Fuck. Nineteen years old and busted necking in the park. I rolled down the window to see one of the rookie cops glaring at us. He stared at me and his censure turned to amusement. “Gabe Brunner?”
I shielded my eyes from the glare of his flashlight. “Holy shit! Ethan?”
Maybe we’d be okay. Ethan Daniels graduated two years ahead of us and he wasn’t necessarily a friend, but we’d traveled in the same packs.
“Man, you should know better than to come up here this late at night,” he scolded me. So far, he hadn’t seemed to recognize Trevor. Panic radiated off my boyfriend. He wasn’t ready for anyone in town to figure out we were together. “Yeah, sorry. Needed to do some heavy-duty groveling. You know how it goes.”
“Oh, that I do.” Ethan chuckled. “Get out of here before Officer Pettit comes around. I’ll let you off with a warning, but he’s still the same hardass he always was.”
Good to know. I wasn’t aware the senior officers on the force worked anything other than weekday day shifts and I definitely didn’t want to get on his bad side. He’d earned the nickname Pissy Pettit because he was always in a foul mood and seemed to get off on writing tickets.
As soon as Ethan disappeared back to his squad, I burst out laughing. Trevor, unfortunately, didn’t think it was nearly as amusing as I had. He smacked my shoulder. Hard. “Let’s get the hell out of here before we get caught for real.”
I leaned over to steal one last kiss. Trevor muttered something under his breath about being the first teenager to die from a stroke after being caught with his boyfriend. I chuckled again as I started the Jeep and backed out.
The drive back to my house was just as quiet as the one to the park, but this time, it was the easy silence of two men who didn’t have to fill every second with idle chatter. Luckily, I’d had the forethought to grab the garage door opener before we left, so I was able to pull right in. My heart beat a little faster as we’d driven past Trevor’s parents’ house, because I knew he wasn’t ready to deal with them yet. We’d have to first thing in the morning, but first, we both needed some rest. It’d been an emotionally draining night.
Unfortunately, my luck for the night had run out. So far, despite the massive cliff I’d managed to avoid plunging over with Trevor, it’d been a good night. I felt better after talking to him. My only regret was not doing so sooner. But Mom, Dad, and Seth were all sitting around the kitchen table when we walked in through the door from the garage to the kitchen.
“You boys get lost on the long drive from DeeDee and Randy’s?” Dad asked, quirking an eyebrow to let us both know he knew the truth about us and had his own assumptions about where we’d gone.
“Sorry, we….” Shit. What could I say that wouldn’t blatantly out us?
Trevor leaned in close enough to whisper. “I’m sure your mom told him. I might’ve accidentally come out to her when I had my meltdown.”
I gaped at him. “Seriously? I thought we were going to decide together when the time was right to tell everyone.”
“It’s not like I planned it,” he responded defensively. “I wasn’t exactly thinking clearly and when Gwen got me to tell her why I was so upset and why you weren’t here with me, it sort of all came out.”
“And we’re not upset about it,” Dad told both of us. Dammit, I’d once again gotten so caught up in Trevor I’d forgotten we weren’t alone.
Seth excused himself, saying it’d been a long day and he needed to sleep. Mom patted him on the shoulder and wished him sweet dreams, the same as she always did to Trevor and me when we were home. I smiled, hoping that meant Seth had parental figures who wouldn’t damn and disown him if he ever decided to come out.
“Sit,” Dad said curtly once it was the four of us.
“Look, I know it’s probably a shock to you guys, but you have to know this isn’t some weird phase or anything. And I didn’t pressure Trevor into being with me, it just sort of happened.” I wanted to get that out there before Dad could say anything. He needed to know we were the real deal.
Trevor grabbed my hand beneath the table and held on tight. I was his lifeline and he was mine.
