The snick of the lube bottle cap opening seemed to echo off the walls. Cold, slick-covered fingers slid from my balls to my ass. I writhed, impatient for what I knew came next.
The anxiety that’d eluded me so far returned. I needed him to enjoy this. I wasn’t sure yet about topping him but also worried allowing him to penetrate me would be painful or unpleasant.
“You’re thinking again,” he pointed out, still rubbing gently against my entrance. He pressed harder, almost penetrating me, but not quite. “I can feel it here. You’re tensing up on me. I need you to trust me if we’re going to do this.”
“I do,” I promised him. “Implicitly.”
“Then let me get you ready. I want to make sure I don’t hurt you.”
In that moment, I knew he never would. Not if there was any way he could help it. My shoulders dropped to the bed as I arched my ass higher into the air. “You won’t, but if you don’t dosomethingthe blue balls are going to be the death of me.”
“So dramatic,” Gabe teased. I flinched when slick fingers met my hole. I closed my eyes, breathing as I tried to stay relaxed for him. I threw my head back when he breached me. “That’s it, baby. Let me in.”
He continued praising me as he worked my body, first with a single finger, then working his way up to three. More than once, I had to bury my head in the pillow. It wasn’t exactly pleasant but I knew the reward would be worth it. It seemed to take forever before Gabe declared I was ready.
“How do you want to do this?” he asked as he rolled to my side. I would have complained about him stalling, dragging out the sweet torture, but when I opened my eyes, I noticed his furrowed brow. For as confident as he always came across, Gabe was nervous.
I rolled to my side, scooting close enough I could drape a leg over his. If I reminded himbothof us needed to be ready for what I wanted to happen tonight, he’d back off, assuming I was the one having second thoughts. Instead, I tried for quiet reassurance. “Positions aren’t important. All that matters is you and me. It’s going to be fine, Gabe.”
“I know, but–” I cut him off with a tender kiss. His mouth dropped open and I closed my eyes, silently reminding myself I could do this. If he wasn’t going to take charge, I could. Just because I would be the one getting penetrated didn’t mean he had to be in control.
I rolled again, straddling his hips. “Just like this. Let me do it, that way I can take a break if it’s too much.” I curled my hand around the base of Gabe’s dick, giving him a few strokes to bring him back from half-mast. He seriously needed to quit worrying so much.
“I just don’t want to hurt you,” he admitted. It was sweet, and I already figured that was his issue. Unfortunately, I was pretty sure itwasgoing to hurt since I’d never had anything more than a couple of fingers up there, and even that wasn’t the most pleasant experience in the world. I kept that to myself along with all the other things I wasn’t telling him.
Gabe was a fantastic boyfriend, just a bit too careful with me sometimes. His body vibrated with need. His hands fisted the sheets as he tried to hold back even though I knew the anticipation was killing him. As I lowered myself closer to the head of his dick, I rocked my hips slowly, giving him a preview of what was to come. I felt ridiculous and sexy all at the same time.
Both of us gasped when the tip pressed against my hole. I took a few steadying breaths, silently reminding myself that I could do this, that I just needed to relax. And then–
Oh fuck, that hurt.I swallowed the cry of pain that wanted to escape. I’d researched enough to know this discomfort was totally normal. I just had to…
“Easy, baby. There’s no hurry.” Gabe ran his hands up and down my thighs. “You feel so good. Tight…” I lowered myself a bit more. Beads of sweat popped up on my forehead. “That’s it, Trev. Take your time. Does it feel good for you?”
I nodded, unable to speak. Good might have been a bit of a stretch but it wasn’t as painful as it had been at first. When I’d finally taken his entire length, I fell over him, needing a minute to adjust. Gabe wrapped his arms tightly around my back, kissing the side of my head as he continued praising me.
And then… he moved, slowly rocking his hips back and forth. The short, quick thrusts of his dick inside of me seemed to hit every single nerve ending. Whatever pain lingered quickly faded, until there was only mind-blowing pleasure. When I sat up, we began moving in concert with one another.
Gabe’s fingers dug into my thighs. “Please tell me this feels as good to you as it does to me?”
“Maybe even better.” This time, it wasn’t a lie. Without even touching my dick, I was ready to shoot all over him. As soon as that thought entered my mind, it was theonlything I could think of. I wanted to mark him, claim him. It was stupid because it wasn’t like anyone would know, but this primal need filled me. I curled my fingers around my shaft and started jerking off as he fucked me. “Faster. You don’t need to be gentle with me.”
I didn’twantgentle. I wanted him to lose his damned mind and fuck me. I wanted all of that pent up energy and frustration released into my ass.
I braced myself with a hand on Gabe’s chest when he relented and started bucking his hips off the bed. Both of us were gasping for air. It was… everything I never imagined it would be like. It was better. It was stupid because I knew anal sex wasn’t any sort of benchmark to making a relationship real, but in that moment, I felt closer to Gabe than I ever had before.
It was all over too fast. I couldn’t stave off my orgasm, and within seconds, Gabe was crying out, cursing me for getting him off too fast. As I came down from the high of my release, every muscle in my body seemed to give out at once. I collapsed onto Gabe’s chest, not even bothered by the sticky mess I knew I was rubbing into both of us. I winced when Gabe pulled out of me.Thatwasn’t the most pleasant feeling in the world.
He slid out from beneath me, pulling the covers over my legs. At some point later, I was vaguely aware of a damp washcloth running over my stomach but I couldn’t be bothered to open my eyes. Strong arms wrapped around me before Gabe scooted me to the opposite side of my bed. When I shifted, I became aware of the tenderness in my ass, but the discomfort was worth it for the way I felt falling asleep in his arms after he made love to me.
