She smiled as two large teardrops fell down her cheeks. Yep. Dylan. It was perfect. That name was perfect. AJ was perfect, too.
“Come on. I’m gonna be late.” He got out of the SUV and came around and opened Poppy’s door.
“Late for what?” she asked as he helped her down. She wiped her cheeks and sniffed, wondering what she’d forgotten as they hurried to the ADU.
“OnlyFans. I can’t let my public down. It’s chicken and rice tonight.”
Her head fell back as she belly laughed. It had been a running joke now that whenever AJ cooked, he was livestreaming for his “public.” He even pretended to talk to them sometimes just to make her laugh, especially if she was having a tough day.
He always did that, whenever she was upset or in pain or overwhelmed, he knew exactly how to distract and entertain her, but he could also have the hard talks, like he’d just shown.
AJ let them in, and he immediately went to work on chicken and rice for dinner with strict instructions for her to rest.
Poppy sat on the loveseat and pulled out her computer. She tried to concentrate on her thesis notes, but she just kept getting distracted by the hotness in the kitchen. All her life she had a picture in her head of what her perfect life, and her perfect family would look like. She’d have her dream job, meet the love of her life, they would date, get married, buy a house together, get a dog, and start a family.
As of now her professional life was in limbo, she bought a house alone, she was back in school, she had no dog, the love of her life was a one-night-stand fail who was also her brother’s new wife’s brother, and she was pregnant, but she hadn’t told anyone in her family.
It definitely wasn’t what she’d pictured, but she was starting to believe it was the way things were always supposed to be.
28
Poppy putthe last glass into the cupboard and shut the door as AJ wiped down the table after dinner. She watched his muscles ripple beneath his cotton t-shirt as his forearm swept across the wooden surface, and tingles spread from her core through her entire body. Maybe it was the pregnancy, but her and AJ doing household chores together was a massive turn-on. The close proximity of the kitchen meant there had continually been innocent brushes against one another. The thing was, Poppy wasn’t interested in innocent.
Their naughty shower escapades had been weeks ago, and AJ hadn’t made any advances on her since then. No kissing, other than on the forehead, which she didn’t count. The only physical contact they’d had was his hand on her lower back. She wasn’t sure if that was because she’d set boundaries of no sleepovers, and no more showers, implying no more sexy time, or if he wasn’t attracted to her, but she wanted to find out.
“Do you remember the shower?” she asked, her inner walls clenching at the memory.
His arm stopped moving, his back still facing her.
“The shower where we…where I…” she continued.
He turned around, his eyes filled with a fiery intensity she hadn’t seen since, well, since the shower. “Yes.”
“We haven’t done anything like that since then.”
He stared at her, nothing in his expression giving anything away.
Poppy knew that she’d have to come straight out and ask AJ. Miss Carol always said never ask a question you don’t want to know the answer to. Poppy had a feeling she knew why the physical portion of their relationship had come to a screeching halt, and she didn’t necessarily want to hear that confirmed. But she knew if she didn’t ask, she would wonder. And the good thing about AJ was he would never lie to her, something she’d never been able to say about anyone else in her life.
“I know we’re not in a relationship, so it’s not like weshouldhave, but is the reason nothing else has happened because I’m pregnant?”
Poppy found herself holding her breath as she waited to hear his response. She wasn’t sure what would be the best outcome. Would it be best if he just wasn’t attracted to a person in her condition? Or would it be better if he had just lost interest in her as a person and it had nothing to do with the pregnancy?
“Yes,” he confirmed as he moved to the other side of the kitchen, as far from her as he could be.
Her heart sank like the bow of the Titanic. At least she knew now that their relationship from this point on was totally platonic, any looks she thought he was giving her were just projections on her part. She could stop walking around like a silly schoolgirl with a crush, thinking this relationship was something it wasn’t.
It hurt to hear, but in the long run, it was for the best. At least, that’s what she was telling herself.
“I don’t want to hurt you.” Every word he spoke sounded like it pained him. “Or the baby.”
“Oh, I thought…so it’s not that you aren’t attracted to me?”
“I amveryattracted to you.” He leaned back against the counter, his hands gripping the sides.
“You are?”
“Sometimes I can’t even think straight when I’m around you.”
