Alexis laughed. “That’s exactly how I feel when I’m swimming. As if I am part of the water, as if I belong to it while I’m in it. I sometimes think that I do have fins. But, Cloud, the best part is—”
He turned to face her. Her amber eyes were glowing, her mouth was turned up in a smile, remembering. He returned her smile but there was sadness in the sensuous curve of his lips. “The best part,” he said, “is when you decide to get out and find that you can. The best part is heading for shore and making it. The best part is finding your fins have disappeared and your legs will carry you on land.”
“How did you know?” she asked breathlessly.
“I saw it,” he said. “I saw all of it that day.”
“What did you think then?”
“That I wanted you.”
“Oh.” She moved closer to him then, nestling her head on his shoulder. In a short time they were both asleep.
Alexis woke Cloud with the constant movement she made by rubbing her back against the sheets. Her hand went to her back as she tried to scratch it and he slapped it away, waking her.
“Stop it, Alex,” he said roughly. “You’re going to make it worse. I’ll have to wrap your hands if you can’t keep them away.”
Alexis was still half asleep and did not have the vaguest idea what he was muttering about. She smiled through her haze and wrapped a leg around his. She closed her eyes, almost asleep again.
Cloud pushed her leg away, mumbling about a lesson she still needed, and got out of the bunk. He lit the lamp that had gone out hours ago and searched for the lotion he had forgotten in the wake of more important matters. He found it under the table where it had rolled in compliance with the motion of the ship.
“Cloud?” Alexis demanded wearily as she began to wake more fully from all his noise. “What are you doing?”
“Got it.”
“Got what?”
“This.” He held out the bottle.
Alexis groaned. “The last time you tried to put that on me we did something else entirely. I’m too tired, Cloud. Let me sleep.” She buried her face into her pillow in an attempt to block out the light from the lamp.
“Little tart. Sleep is exactly what I had in mind, mainly mine, I’ll admit. Only I can’t get any with you constantly moving around trying to scratch your back.” He heard Alexis’s muffled laugh through the pillow and he nipped her lightly on her arm with his teeth. She squealed and he kissed her shoulder, brushing the hair away from her back at the same time. She relaxed under his tender caress and it was with great difficulty that he kept to his commitment to open the bottle.
“You’re not making this very easy,” he cautioned her as he began to apply the lotion and she squirmed invitingly beneath his warm hand.
“I am not trying to do anything,” she retorted. “It just feels so damn good.”
He slapped her bottom through the sheets. “Lie still while I see what kind of damage you have inflicted with all your scratching.” He put the bottle back on the floor and rubbed the remainder of the lotion into her cuts. She did not move an inch. “Alex,” he said when he was finished. “You have some other marks on your back that weren’t made with any whip.” He touched her in one of the places. She moved slightly, her wince inherent in her movement. He took his hand away. “I didn’t notice them before. They’re very faint. Were you a terribly clumsy child?” He knew it was not the answer.
“Please, Cloud. May I have my shirt now? I would like to put it on.” Her arm went over the side of the bunk and she groped to find it, her face still resting in the pillow.
Cloud snatched it away from her the instant her fingers curled around the material. Alexis sat up and reached for it but he held it out of her grasp. “Why?” he asked, his voice strangely hard. “Why do you want it, Alex?”
In answer she attempted to claw at his face and chest. Why didn’t he just let go? Why did he want to know everything? Why did he have to see so much? Understand so well? As he gripped her wrists tightly together and pinned them above her head, forcing her to lie back on the bunk, she knew she could never be with him now if he were not capable of all the things she despised him for at the moment. She struggled with him a few minutes longer until she was exhausted.
“Alex.” He said her name gently but loudly enough so she could hear it over her heavy breathing. When she had quieted he said her name again and went on. “I have already seen those marks on your back. Hiding them doesn’t make them any less real.” He paused and helped her sit up then he slid the sleeves of the shirt over her arms. “You may have it now,” he said. “Now that you know nothing has changed.”
Alexis nodded dumbly and began to button the shirt. He stopped her with his hand and unfastened it again. “Let’s not try to hide everything,” he said, pulling her against him and slipping an arm under the open material to encircle her waist. He let her have a moment to feel his strength, allowing her to take some of it before he questioned her again. “The marks. They look as if—”
“From a belt. My father’s belt. Not George,” she added quickly when she felt him tense. “Not even my real father for that matter. Charlie and Meg took me in when I was young and raised me with their own children. They never let me forget I was an extra mouth to feed and that they had made hundreds of sacrifices in order to keep me with them. It was hard to find work in London so I couldn’t bring in extra money but I did almost everything else for them. He beat me anyway.”
“London? You lived in London? But how?”
She put a finger to his lips to silence him. “Oi was a real street brat, Oi was. Oi spent me toime at th’ ’arbor. Th’ sailors tol’ me stories about all th’ plaices they seen an’ they taugh’ me a little about ships.” She laughed at his widened eyes. “The rest of my free time I spent in the park listening to the fine ladies talk and trying to imitate their speech. Charlie and I had an argument one day and it ended with him deciding he was going to sell me. Do you know about things like that, Cloud, or do I have to explain what it meant?”
“I know,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “How old were you then?”
“Thirteen.” His arm tightened around her waist. “I decided to run away before anything could happen. I chose the United States as my destination and theConstellationas the means to get me there. I cut my hair, stole my brother’s clothes, and took a new name for myself. I managed to get aboard the ship and fool Pauley almost the entire way to Charleston.”
