“Okay,” he says, but he looks doubtful. Doeshewant to press charges?
“You’ll tell the police? No charges. Please,” she says.
“I will. But there will have to be some ... consequences. Babe, that wasn’t her gun. She doesn’t have a license to have a gun. She was threatening Sitka. You.”
When Angeni swallows, it is like a boulder tumbling down her throat.
“She wouldn’t hurt me. She was trying to protect me.”
“Protect you?”
“It’s all a misunderstanding, okay?”
“Okay, babe,” he says, his tone placating. “I think you need to focus on getting well.”
She nods. What is there to say? Of course she needs to focus on getting well.
“Do you want me to say anything to the community?” he asks.
He means the Instagram community. He must be concerned about her following. He knows people want to hear from her. He knows their curiosity and care will turn to resentment if she is silent too long. That is the way this world is—they do not care for her; they care for what she offers them.
“Not now,” she says. “Okay?”
He nods once. “Okay. Whatever you think is best.”
Another tear rolls down her cheek. Freya is the one who sees it and instinctively puts her hand on Angeni’s face.
“Things are going to get back to normal,” Erik says.
In his pleading eyes, she can see that he wants to believe this is true.
“What if I don’t want them to get back to normal?”
He cocks his head to the side like a dog trying to decipher a command from its owner. Her poor, loyal husband. She has not let him know her, not completely.
“There are things I need to tell you,” she says, “before you decide what kind of ‘normal’ you want with me.”
All these years, they’ve projected this relationship of depth and transparency, and yet she’s never told him the whole truth.
“There are things I need to tell you too,” he says.
Her things are worse, though. She is sure of this.
“Let me go first.”
“Sure. Yeah. You can tell me anything, babe,” he says.
Can she? She figures she may as well try.
She takes as deep a breath as her damaged chest will allow, and then she begins.
“My name wasn’t always Angeni.”
Chapter 39
Sasha
Sasha is on the ferry to Seattle, watching as Bainbridge Island gets smaller and smaller in the distance. Will she ever come back? She doesn’t think so.
