My fingers close around my necklace. After my successful gallery showing, I think it’s a good luck charm. Almost like that brave little girl belongs to this necklace. Maybe good things happen when I wear it.
“We should do a girls' trip soon,” I say. “Once Hallie is comfortable leaving Liam.”
Hallie smiles. She was one of the first real friends I ever made in America. She and her dad were constants when my mom kept vanishing with her latest obsession. I look at Hallie, seeing her this happy now, heals part of me. After her dad died, she lost a piece of herself. I did everything I could to help her with her grief, to be the friend that she’s been to me all these years. And nothing makes me happier than seeing my friend finally get her spark back.
“Yes! Let’s book something! I’m sure we can use the jet,” Bella chimes in.
I laugh. I still can’t believe they bought her a jet.
“We’re supposed to be flying to France again soon to watch the ballet,” Bella tells us.
The word hits me in the chest. I swallow and cough, my throat tightening. I feel Hallie watching me.
She knows something broke in me after my final show. I never told her what. At one point, I even faked an injury when she asked why I wasn’t going to my lessons.
I hate even talking about it. Even now, it feels as raw as it did five years ago.
“That will be an incredible experience, Bels,” I say, meaning it.
I miss it more than I ever admit. Ballet was my entire world. From three years old until the night it all ended. If that man hadn’t saved me that night, I’m not sure where I’d be right now. What if my mom’s husband actually raped me?
What was he going to do to me? Kill me after?
Shit. I can feel his fingers grazing my thighs. I swallow the bile rising up my throat. I need the aftershave. I need to feel safe again.
“You know, you could still dance, as a hobby?” Bella says, after watching my demeanor change.
“No.” The answer comes out sharp. Final.
The last time I touched my pointe shoes, I couldn’t breathe. I slide my hand into my purse and just feel the navy bottle in there. If I couldn’t find the man who saved me, this was the second-best thing.
“That’s my past. I don’t need to be reminded of what I lost,” I add quietly.
“But, you love it, Lily. What about local classes?” Hallie presses.
I close my eyes and pull in a slow breath.
“I don’t want to. Going to the gym is fine.” I slide out of the booth, and guilt flickers across both their faces.
“More drinks?” I ask, smiling like my heart doesn’t ache.
“Please,” they say together.
I weave through the crowd toward the bar, the bass thumping through my ribs. That familiar prickle creeps up my spine, the sense of being watched. I glance around. Nothing. No one.
The bartender takes my order. I watch his hands move, veins flexing in his forearms. He’s handsome. Effortlessly so.
He slides the drinks across the bar and grins. My eyes widen. Fuck. He caught me staring.
“Are you doing anything later?” he asks, leaning closer.
“Uh.”
My brain stalls. He’s cute. Not creepy. But I’d need at least five more drinks to even consider it.
“No. I have no plans,” I say, forcing a grin.
He hands over the next two cocktails in margarita glasses, his fingers brushing mine for a second too long.
