‘Heck, Lizzie!’ What on earth has been going on in her mind this past week since Alison came into our lives? I swivel to face her. ‘This wasn’t your fault. How were you to know what would happen?’
She nods. ‘That’s what Alison said.’
That staggered me. ‘You’ve told her?’
‘Yes, we all talked about it earlier. Alison said that she doesn’t blame me, she blames herself.’ I listen as she relates the conversation to me, hardly believing it when she says that neither Carol nor George were Alison’s real parents.
I’m gobsmacked by all these revelations. And my heart is racing as I wonder what else Alison has told her.
‘So you’re all good now? No more hard feelings with Alison?’
Lizzie takes a sip of her wine then her eyes meet mine.
‘No. And that’s my secrets out in the open. Your turn now.’
52
LIZZIE
Nick pushes a lock of his hair back from his forehead. I can see beads of sweat glistening there. He’s hiding something. I know he is.
‘What do you mean?’ he stammers. He’s playing for time. What is it that he’s scared I’ve found out?
Does he still have feelings for Alison?
I have to know. Whatever it is.
‘I need to ask you something and I want you to be totally honest with me.’
He takes a sip of his wine, his actions measured. ‘Go on.’
My eyes meet his. I hold his gaze. I want, need to see his reaction. I will see it in his eyes if he is lying.
‘What exactly was your relationship with Alison? Did you sleep together?’
‘What has she said?’
‘She said I had to ask you. But that makes me think you did.’
He nods slowly. ‘Yes, but it was only the once. And it was years ago, Lizzie. It’s not important.’
‘Then why didn’t you just come clean? What are you trying to hide?’ I pause. ‘Are you still attracted to her? Is that why you keep meeting up with her in secret?’
‘Of course not! I love you!’ He runs his hand through his hair. ‘And I’m not meeting her in secret. I’m not trying to hide anything, but you were so worked up about thinking Alison was trying to push you out I didn’t want you to start feeling insecure about me too.’ He puts his wine down, moves closer towards me and lightly caresses my cheek with his fingertips. ‘I love you, Lizzie. Always have, always will. Past isn’t important.’
‘It’s not that I’m jealous, Nick.’ I swallow, trying to find the words to explain how I feel. ‘But ever since the wedding I feel like our worlds been tipped upside down. Mum’s accident, and how weak she still is, and how Alison has completely taken over.’ She hesitates. ‘She’s so much more glamorous and confident than me that I thought…’
He puts his finger on my lips to silence me. ‘You’re beautiful, Lizzie. And I adore you. Alison and I were friends for a short time years ago. That’s all there is to it.’
‘But Alison said to talk to you about it. As if there was something more.’
He shakes his head. ‘There’s nothing more. She probably told you to talk to me so I could reassure you, because you wouldn’t believe her.’
That makes sense.
‘I know that your anxiety has been sky high since the wedding, love. Now everything is out in the open do you think you can relax a bit?’ Nick asks gently.
I want to. I really do.
