In an instant, I became colossally focused on him. “You okay?”
“Yeah.” Embry cupped my neck and drew me in. “Just on the fucking edge, man, and I don’t want it to end here.”
“What do you want?”
“I want you to fuck me and not be afraid of anything except blowing your load too soon.”
“I’m not afraid of that.”
“No?”
“No.” I captured his mouth, driving my tongue into his mouth. “Cos if it happened, I’d be hard again in ten seconds flat. You have that effect on me, chaparrito.”
Embry smirked, but something deeper lingered. Something he needed from me before this train derailed and we couldn’t fucking catch it.
I reached between us, fisting his cock and squeezing as I kept my lips as close to him as they could be without kissing him. “I know I haven’t earned this, but if we’re gonna fuck the way you want, I’ve got to trust you to tell me if something isn’t right. I have to live with a lot of sins, but I can’t hurt you like that. Not again. It’d kill me, Em.”
“You’veneverhurt me like that.”
“I fucked you while I was lying to you.”
“And you shouldn’t have, but it’s not the same, and nothing you do ever will be.”
There was a growl in his voice by the time he was done. Anger, but not for me. Still, I latched on to the energy and let it drive us to another plane.
I pulled him off the counter and deeper into the shadowy house, flicking a lamp on when we reached the living room. There was no way I was fucking him in the dark. For many reasons, but mainly that I wanted to see him.
Rubi’s living room was cosy and mostly filled by a couch long and wide enough to be a bed. I pushed Embry towards it. “Wait here.”
He said nothing as I hightailed it out of the room in search of the bathroom, praying Rubi had thought his crafty plan through to this moment.
Or that he was enough of a dirty bastard to have everything we needed on hand.
Two minutes later he was my new best friend.
I went back to the living room.
Embry was by the window, peering through a gap in the heavy curtains. I tossed condoms and lube on the couch, then I faltered, gazing at his profile as he stared out into the night.You’re gonna fuck him again. The notion floored me. I’d lied to him for a thousand years and he still wanted me. How was this my life when everything else was so fucking fucked?
“Don’t.”
Embry’s shove came from nowhere, rocking me back.
I stumbled into a media unit and raised my hands, and his lip curled in response, an ugly sneer that somehow made him hotter.
“You’re already doing it, aren’t you?”
“Doing what?”
“Getting in your head. Fuck, Mateo. I need youhere, with me. Why won’t you listen?”
He pushed me again, but I had nowhere to go, and I snatched his hands, propelling him back to the couch, an emotion I couldn’t catch exploding out of me in a frustrated shout, contemplation to this frantic ball of... something in ten seconds flat. “I am listening. Iheardyou. What do you want from me? Tell me, and I’ll fucking do it.”
“You won’t,” Embry combatted, the challenge clear in his wild gaze. “You say you will, but you’re as fucked up as I am.”
“Truth. Won’t stop me doing whatever the hell you want, but you gotta tell me. I’m not a mind reader.”
He laughed, full of warmth but lacking humour. “Not a mind reader... mother of Christ, you have no idea who you are.”
