“Mateo.”
It was the third time he’d said my name, but it was quieter now. A whisper. And I heard him clearer than ever.
“I’m here.”
“Sure about that?” Embry got in my face the way only he could. “I’m about to let go, so I need to know you won’t fall.”
“I’m not going to fall.”
He believed me and released his death grip on my arms. Blood flowed back into my hands. I flexed them, nodding slowly. “I’m okay, I promise.”
Embry jabbed a finger behind me. “Kitchen.”
Okay, then.
I made it to the kitchen, fuelled by the knowledge he was right behind me. Lacking any better ideas, I went back to searching for Rubi’s smoke stash.
Embry opened the freezer and rummaged inside. He pulled a dish out and inspected the contents. “What would you say this is?”
I peered up from the under-sink cupboard. “Lasagne? Maybe?”
“That works.” He chucked the dish in the oven, then hoisted himself onto the counter to watch me rifle through cleaning products and bin bags. He didn’t ask what I was looking for.
Maybe he knew.
Maybe he didn’t give a solitary fuck. Whatever. I was glad he didn’t seem angry anymore. Embry’s fuck-off vibes were killer, and according to him, I was already half dead.
“It’s in the fish food.”
“Huh?”
Embry toed off his boots. “The hash.”
Oh. My fingers grazed the blue tub of goldfish food. I plucked it from the shelf and popped the lid. Inside, beneath the weird smelling flakes, was a clingfilm-wrapped bundle of joy.
Relief washed over me. I shut the cupboard and rose, feeling Embry watching my every move as I patted my pockets for a cigarette box.
Skinning up was as natural as breathing. I lit the blunt and took a hit. Sharp smoke burned my lungs, and it felt almost as good as raising my gaze to find him still there.
Still so fucking beautiful.
His hair was longer and he had scruff on his face. It made him look older, wiser, and so goddamn sexy that my fractured mind fell into the gutter.
Embry saw the shift in me. “What’s on your mind, brother?”
“You don’t want to know.”
“Wouldn’t ask if I didn’t.”
“Are you asking as my chaplain?”
“Does it make a difference?”
“Depends how honest you want me to be.”
Embry leaned back, stretching his arms above his head. The movement revealed a slice of his abdomen and the filth in my brain tripled, hazing his voice as he spoke again. “Ineedyou to be honest. Or these moments we spend alone together can’t happen anymore.”
There was so much more to what he was saying than the actual words, and I knew it. But our world was so uncertain right now, if we were gonna survive, we had to strip it back to basics.
