A reset.
A blank page.
A circuit breaker.
Kai draws closer. My skin tingles in anticipation of his touch, but it doesn’t come. He takes the branch from me instead and gives it an experimental twirl. “Where did you learn this?”
“Bali. From my ex.”
“Your ex…boyfriend?”
“That’s the one.”
He nods, more to himself than to me. “I wasn’t sure.”
“About my ex?”
“No, about your sexuality. Not that it matters, I just…uh, wondered.”
“Why?”
He spins the branch again. A deflection? No. I don’t think so. But maybe he doesn’t have an answer to give, and I can live with that.
Can’t live with this heat, though. I reach over my shoulder and pull my T-shirt off.
Kai drops the branch.
Crouches to retrieve it and takes a million years to come back up.
I join the dots and step away. I’ve been wrong about this shit in the past, but I’m not wrong now. He likes what he sees, and he doesn’t know what to do with it. A sexual awakening or a straight boy with a fetish?
Doesn’t matter. He’s a good man, and I want us to be friends. I’m not here to make life harder for him.
Put your shirt back on, then.
I don’t. Instead, I turn and keep walking, trusting I’m going in the right direction and Kai will follow, spreading my arms wide, catching the sun and the gentle breeze.
Man, this place is heaven.
I close my eyes. Kai’s footsteps sound behind me, light for such a big man, and I feel his presence as he reaches my side. I don’t need to look. His face is indelibly etched in my brain. Even if I never saw him again, I reckon I could draw it from memory. His rugged jaw, tanned cheekbones, and soulful gaze. His full lips. It’s unfair that he’s so hot. That he’s sonice.Resisting a wanker is so much easier.
“Can I ask you something?” he says suddenly.
I’m weak. I’ve never claimed to be anything else. I open my eyes. Drop my arms and turn to him without a second thought. “Sure.”
“Have you always had long hair?”
Okay, that’s an easy one. Or at least off the topic I was expecting. “Yeah, since I was little and my old man—my dad—realized that taking me to the barber was a nightmare. I couldn’t sit still and I hated having my scalp touched, so he let me grow it, and then my cousins grew theirs in solidarity.”
“Wow. That’s cool. How many of you?”
“Five. But only one kept it into adulthood, and he kinda looks like a Viking these days—if Vikings rode Harleys.”
Kai nods, taking it all in. We keep walking. He says nothing and I feel the need to fill the silence with something ridiculous. “I changed my mind when I got older.”
He shifts his gaze to me. “About what?”
“About having hands on my head, fingers in my hair, nails on my scalp. I like it now. Love it, actually.”
