Margaret joined her when she laughed and then the seamstress shared some stories about the men in the castle, like Rauf’s fondness for Agnes, a maid at Lismoor, and how Simon was terrified of cats, and they laughed some more.
Julianna wanted to ask her if she knew what terrified the earl. He was still running.
She decided not to worry over Nicholas while she was with the babe. She would make the most of the morning and take Elias outside again until Nicholas’ guests began arriving. She wanted to explore the rear tower opposite the keep. There were two smaller towers, but only the rear one had windows and she’d seen people, mostly the men, entering it. She wasn’t afraid of the men anymore. There was no reason to be. They had all been very courteous to her, inviting her here or there. It all made her even more sorry for ruining years of her life because she’d been afraid of them.
When she finished wrapping Elias, she bundled herself in two extra léines and two pairs of breeches, a coat and her cloak and left her chamber.
Where was Nicholas this morn? She hadn’t seen him at breakfast. He was still nowhere to be found. She was angry with him for staying away for so long. She didn’t like that he ran from his troubles. He was going to have to stop running. For Elias’ sake, and for hers. She loved him and she wasn’t going anywhere so whatever he was afraid of he would just have to get over.
When they were both ready to brave the cold, Julianna took Elias by the hand and left the keep with him. Some of the men greeted her and the babe on their stroll to a small walkway that was almost completely bare of snow. The path across had been made clear and the sides swept clean by its constant use.
She let Elias chase her over the path and to the narrow, stone stairs leading up to the tower’s narrow door.
“Come, lad, I must carry you up,” she told the babe.
“Lyahs want to climb!” he argued. He enjoyed walking and doing certain things on his own. A good sign of confidence. Was it growing already? Had he possessed it since birth?
“Does Elias want to fall, as well?” She scooped him up but he immediately began to cry and kick.
“Lyahs want to climb!” he carried on, squirming and flailing, kicking his feet and hitting her a few times on the arm. “Want to climb!”
“Elias!” she said sternly and set him down on his feet. She leaned down on her knee and looked him in the eye. “What is this behavior?”
“Lyahs want to climb.”
Gah! Impossible! Julianna stared at him. How could such a tiny being wield such power over her? “Very well,” she said, giving in and not caring. “You can climb, but Julianna will be with you. Aye?”
He wiped his nose, nodded, and turned for the stairs.
Julianna followed close behind. So close that the front of her was almost touching the back of him. She told him to press his hand to the wall and do not release it. It would keep him from falling over the side. She curled her shoulders in and stretched out her arms to encircle him and followed him up, slowly, carefully, to the top.
Nicholas stood in front of the door like a dark, shimmering shield, with his arms folded across his midnight blue cloak. He looked down at Elias, and then at her.
“You had him well covered.”
“Aye,” she whispered back. “He is very brave.”
Nicholas nodded and moved aside so she could pass. He brought them through the narrow door to a front room where she unwrapped Elias and removed her cloak.
Once his son was free, Nicholas bent down and picked him up. “You climbed well, for I watched. You listened and kept your hand on the wall and climbed to the top. Well done.”
He turned to her. “What are you doing at the tower?”
“I wanted to see it,” she told him then narrowed her eyes on him and remembered that she was angry with him. “What areyoudoing here?”
“I wanted to have a talk with the men about the bishop…and about you.”
“Oh?” she asked. “What about me?”
“I wanted them to know that if any of them dishonor you in any way, they will make an enemy of me.”
“Oh.” Her voice was low, laced with understanding as she looked into his flinty, gray eyes. “Thank you.”
It didn’t mean anything, she told herself as her heart accelerated. He was protecting his son’s governess. If she was unsafe so was his son.
“Did you want to go on alone?” he asked her. “Or would you prefer if I showed you around? We have time before people start arriving.”
He hadn’t been running after all. He’d been warning his men not to dishonor her. Her anger vanished. “I would like you to stay.”
