Exile went by Dan back then. He had a stick up his ass and didn’t wear his cowboy hat yet. Exile felt like an unfinished person, but I saw potential.
For one thing, he never flinched in the face of danger. When Wrecker’s guys hassled him, he always held steady. Hell, he didn’t even recoil when I acted like a psycho to test him.
Despite York’s misgivings about Wrecker, I was able to bring him and Exile into the fold. They were my most loyal guys, yet one of them had been keeping secrets.
“How long have you known?” I asked Exile as we sat in the quiet restaurant.
With his cowboy hat shadowing his brown eyes, he admitted, “For a while.”
“And you didn’t think to give me a heads up?”
“Lula said a lot of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Didn’t seem smart to spark drama over something that might not stick.”
Leaning back, I smiled at Exile. “We both know you’re full of shit. If our roles were reversed, you’d want me to tell you.”
“Sure, but we aren’t the same. I’m a guy who takes shit too seriously, and you’re a guy who rarely takes anything seriously. Personal things, anyway. You never fuck around when it comes to the club.”
Giving him a snarly smile, I replied, “You’ve hurt my precious feelings by being so wrong.”
“How am I wrong exactly? You’ve never seemed seriously interested in Elle.”
“I told you that her pussy was special.”
Adjusting his damn hat, Exile muttered, “When I met Lula, I felt a strong attraction, sure. But I also cared about her as a person. I always got the sense that Elle’s pussy was special to you, but she wasn’t.”
“I don’t want to make you cry by pointing this out, but you’re stupid, Exile. Like, maybe you have a low IQ.”
“Oh, really? And why would you think that?”
“Elle’s pussy is only special because she’s special. You couldn’t really think it was all about her actual pussy. I didn’t even know what it felt like to have her pussy wrapped around my dick when I said it was special.”
“So, you want her like I want Lula?”
“Is that a trick question? Am I supposed to move here now and follow Elle around like an obedient dog?”
Exile ignored my dig at him and studied me. “If it makes you feel better, I suffered guilt over keeping the secret from you.”
“Aww, well, if you felt deep shame, everything is okay now.”
Exile frowned. “Do you want the truth?”
“Always. I thought you knew that about me.”
“Fine. I thought you’d flip out about the pregnancy and try to bully her into getting rid of it.”
“And you based that worry on what?”
“You don’t do attachments.”
“No, I don’t, but if anyone was going to have my bastard, I’d want it to be Elle Reed.”
Exile stared at me, confused by my words. I smiled at how my behavior threw him for such a loop. He was a great guy, but he had very specific views on the world. When something didn’t fit inside a neat little box, he shut down and refused to engage with a new idea.
“Elle Reed does something to me,” I explained. “I’ve decided to be happy that she’s carrying my kid. I’mchoosingto want a piece of me in the world.”
“Is that why you didn’t use a condom that night with Elle?”
“No, I just wanted to feel her in a way I couldn’t with a condom. Did you strap up with Lula?”
