“He protects his heart by letting only a few people close. I feel him opening himself up for Sutter, the baby, and me. With time, I hope you can also see the softer side of him.”
Shay finally smiled. “Your dad was a hard man to know. Smart people warned me about him. Ford and I shouldn’t have worked. But I loved him, and I didn’t want to love another man.”
Shay sighed deeply, sounding pained. “I’m choosing to trust that you and Zodiac will have the same long life together. But I can’t pretend I won’t miss you and Sutter. I also worry a lot about you being far away in a strange city. So, even though I’ll embrace these changes, you should expect me to be bitchy from time to time.”
Taking my mom’s hand, I fessed up. “I don’t really want to move. I’m afraid of Baton Rouge. It’s a bigger city than I’m used to. I don’t know the Black Rainbow members or their families. I’ve never had to live on my own with Sutter. I can’t be sure how often Zodiac will be around. I’m really scared about this move.”
Shay tightened her grip on my hand as I calmed myself. “But Zodiac is my guy. For months, I lied to myself because the truth terrified me. But I’m ready to be brave and face this new path.”
My mom hugged Ivy and me to her body. She held on until Ford, Clint, and Sutter returned. I smiled at them, sensing they’d also shared a good talk.
While my parents went to their room to work through my mom’s stress, Ivy and Clint disappeared to their own suite down the hall.
Once alone with my boy, I sat with Sutter near the windows facing the city.
“What are you thinking?”
Clearly overwhelmed, Sutter considered my question. “How long will it take for us to fix the important parts of the house and move in?”
“I don’t know. It depends on how much we want to change.”
“Could we move into one of the little houses and fix up the big one?”
“The little ones are ugly, too.”
“I don’t care about ugly. We could clean up one of the little houses and stay there.”
Unsure where his agitation came from, I asked, “What do you like about the property?”
“It feels like Sleepy Eye with the other houses and all the space. We could have so many people stay with us. It’d be like our own neighborhood.”
“The main house is so big that I don’t think it can all be renovated before Trent is born. But I like your idea about staying in a little house while we fix the most important rooms, like the kitchen, our bedrooms, and the living room. The other spaces could be fixed later.”
“Will Hobbs and Newton come with us?”
“Of course. We’ll need a guard dog for when Zodiac isn’t around.”
Sutter snorted. “Zodiac didn’t think we’d like the house.”
“Zodiac was nervous, yeah.”
Sutter’s gray eyes warmed. “I try to think of him as a foster child. When he gets angry, I remember how the foster kids act when they first get to Pax and Bebe’s house. They are sad and mad about having bad parents. They’re scared, too. I think Zodiac was scared today.”
“I like how you show patience with Zodiac. But if you don’t like the property, don’t say otherwise just to make him happy.”
“I do like it. Lula’s house is really fancy. I would like that, too. But the one today was better.”
Smiling, I didn’t want Sutter to silence his heart to make others happy. Our family worked well because we voiced our feelings and were straight with each other.
Hiding wasn’t allowed in the Reed family. That was why Clint was so irritated when I hid my feelings for Zodiac. He was straight with me when he met Ivy. I had shown him disrespect by not being honest when I fell for Zodiac. I never wanted to hide from my family again.
By the time Zodiac arrived at the hotel, I was sure Sutter truly liked the property. We had even begun talking about what he wanted to do for his room.
“I came up with a plan,” Sutter told Zodiac immediately.
Zodiac’s icy blue gaze flashed to me. I knew he was preparing for the worst.
Standing up, I hugged Zodiac. “As I explained to Sabrina, love is worth protecting, and I love you, Zodiac Bondi.”
