Maya’s tears subsided. ‘When did I ever mention children? And if it can’t be forever, why can’t we just enjoy the now? Carry on as we were.’
‘Because my “now” has to be with my wife and my daughter.’
Maya sniffed, then leaning in to Scott, hung on as if she would never let him go. Scott discreetly checked that nobody could see them. The last thing he needed was a nosey student spotting them.
‘Maybe when your wife is better?’ Maya pleaded.
‘No, Maya. I’ve made a decision for once that I must stick to. I’ve been playing a young man’s game for too long. It’s time I grew up.’
Maya pulled herself away from him and covered her face with both hands as if not looking at him would make this whole dreadful situation disappear.
‘I have to go now. I need to go back to the hospital. I’m truly sorry that I have hurt you.’
‘Can’t we go back and go to bed just one more time?’ Maya urged.
Scott was short in his delivery. ‘As much as I want to, it would do neither of us any good. This has to be the end.’
Scott coughed to remove the huge lump that had formed in his throat. Saying goodbye to his little bird was possibly one of the hardest things he had ever had to do. But he was clear in his mind what he was doing was the right thing for him, for his family and ultimately for Maya, too.
He got up and helped Maya up off the grass. No fuss, no bother, he just had to go and go now. He knew if he got within a metre of her front door, he would not be able to resist her and all the temptations she had offered him for so long.
As he walked away Scott didn’t dare look back for he knew if he saw Maya’s sad, beautiful face he might well be tempted to change his mind. His psychology studies had said that itwaspossible to love two people at once; he could now teach this with conviction.
Maya pushed open her bedroom door and threw herself face down onto her bed.
Even if he had wanted to be with her, he had just said he was certain he didn’t want more children. And what use was that to either her or the little bundle of cells that was now growing inside her.
SEVENTY-ONE
Lewis flicked through the TV channels. Not even a weeknight football match could keep his mind focused on anything but Gracie and the Annalize situation. He got himself a can of beer from the fridge, took a sip and put it to one side. Drinking wasn’t the answer, either. He felt like he was going mad. As much as he tried, he couldn’tmakeGracie love him.
He took his toolbox from under the sink and made his way to the nursery. Slowly and painstakingly, and with tears running down his cheeks, he took the two little Moses baskets apart and placed the frames and mattresses neatly against the wall. He boxed up the soft toys and ceiling mobile and gently pulled off the teddy-bear border. All that was left was a white-walled empty shell. The promised warm, happy family of four that could have laughed and grown together in this space was reduced to one sad, lonely man with huge regrets.
He put away his tools and sat back down in front of the TV. At least Gracie would be pleased he’d sorted the spare room. Maybe it was better to see if one of the mums she knew could make use of everything, rather than sell it to a complete stranger on eBay. A good excuse to ring her. He was just about to dial her number when a text flashed up.
Saw Annalize. She lost the baby. It wasn’t yours. G
Lewis phoned her immediately.
‘Wow, OK. Thanks for letting me know.’
‘Kind of a relief for you, I guess?’ Gracie was curt.
‘Gracie, don’t be like this.’
‘Like what?’
‘You know what I mean. At least we can move on now, can’t we? I want to see you, Gracie, I miss you so much.’
‘I texted, not called, because I’m on my way out.’
‘With lover boy, I take it?’
Gracie chose to ignore his comment. Yes, she had arranged to see Ed, but just for a drink and a catch-up. She was confused about how she felt about him, too, especially after her night with Leo. In fact, she felt like her heart and head had been put in a blender and they were whizzing around at one hundred miles an hour. If only the end result could be a love potion that led her to happiness with the right person.
‘I sorted the nursery tonight. Everything is taken down, even the border. I wondered if any of your ladies might have use for it?’
The finality of it all caused Gracie’s heart to break a little bit more. ‘Well, at least that’s something. I’ll ask Kate if she wants anything.’ She croaked.
