“Thank you,” I say. Having job security is the best Christmas present. Next to John’s kisses. My muscles relax, and I’m breathing easier. I’m relieved I didn’t tell him about wanting to leave the office. Maybe he doesn’t need to know how close I was to quitting.
I also love that he wants to do better. Even though he can take seminars and read books, I wouldn’t mind a little one-on-one tutoring to help him communicate better. “I’ll help you.”
* * *
Twilight settles over John’s grandparents’ backyard. As the fire continues to burn, John still holds my hand. Or maybe I’m holding on to him. Either way, I like being connected to him while we figure this out.
At least, I assume that’s what comes next.
His jaw relaxes, which I take as a good sign. “Where does this leave us after today?”
I wish I knew. If we didn’t work together, the question would be easy to answer, but I’ve never dated anyone I worked with. And after Jake… Well, keeping work and personal life separate seems like a smart way to operate. Until fake-dating John. “I don’t know. I mean, you’re my boss.”
“I’ll deal with any issues that arise because of that. Nothing says romance like HR policies.” He sounds very boss-like, but nothing like the Mr. Barrington I thought I worked for. “I’m willing to jump through whatever hoops are necessary to be with you.”
“I appreciate that, but I don’t want everything to fall on you.”
“Considering I’m your boss, I’m happy to handle it. HR paperwork? That’s nothing compared to keeping my feelings for you hidden. But we both need to be mindful of the power imbalance at work.”
“Thanks.”
“Your happiness is what matters most.”
His sincerity leaves me speechless. No one’s ever put my needs first before. I swallow, my voice soft. “Thank you.”
I look at him—not as my boss, but as a kind, caring man who has been trying, in his own awkward way, to look out for me. Curiosity gets the best of me. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“What made you have feelings for me?”
Even though it’s dark outside, the fire and porch lights show the blush rising on his cheeks. “Honestly? It was the day I started. You introduced yourself first, told me all your ideas to change things up. You spoke your mind, even though you didn’t know me at all. I was impressed.”
I can’t help but smile. “So, my stubborn streak was actually a turn-on?”
He laughs, a sound that makes me tingle all over. “You could say that. But what really sealed it for me was when you laughed at my silly jokes. That made it harder to keep my feelings in check.”
“Hence the tough-boss act?”
“Hence the tough-boss act.” He sighs.
“If you’d talked to me like a normal person, we probably could’ve avoided all this drama.”
John shrugs, a rueful smile crossing his face. “I told you, this is my first management role. I was trying to be professional, so I didn’t realize what I was doing.”
“I thought you were just jumping on the ‘Make Abby the scapegoat’ wagon, like my family.”
“I get why you’d think that.” His gaze softens, making me feel heard. “We’re quite a pair, aren’t we?”
The firelight flickers across his face, softening the lines that I used to think were disapproval. Now, I see them as signs of a man who cares and has been hiding his feelings for far too long.
“So, what happens next?” I rephrase his earlier question.
John’s gaze never leaves mine. “That’s up to you. I want to see where this can go. But it’s okay if you need time or don’t feel the same way.”
I rub my fingers together, feeling the warmth of his hand. It’s true I’ve never let myself think of John this way before. But I can’t deny that I want more.
“I’d like to give this a shot.” I choose my words carefully. “But we need some ground rules.”
