GIULIA
“I’m sorry.”Mama runs her hands under her eyes for maybe the hundredth time in the past two minutes, and I think I’m being conservative with that estimate.“I didn’t expect to feel this emotional.My baby is starting college.La mia bambina.”
“It’s college, Mama.She’s not moving halfway around the world.”Dante offers me a brief, sympathetic grin before draping an arm around her shoulders.“You’ll see her this afternoon when she comes back.”
“It’s the milestone that matters,” she insists.“You’ll feel the same way one day when the time comes.Mark my words.I only hope I’m around to tease you when you get choked up.”
It’s almost enough to make me laugh.Dante, choked up?I can’t make the picture take shape in my head.“Anyway, he’s right,” I tell her with much more confidence than I feel.Maybe if I try hard enough, I can forget the nervous knot in my stomach.I’m playing it off well, I think, but inside, it’s a totally different story.I’m shaky, slightly queasy, and there are maybe twenty different outfits on my bed that I tossed aside after deciding they wouldn’t quite work today.
Even now, I can’t stop tugging the hem of my skirt when I hear Papa’s heavy tread coming my way as I try like hell to get out the front door before Mama drowns me in motherly tears.
When he sees us, does he stop to take in the moment?
Does he throw his hands in the air and ask himself where the time went?
Of course not.
“You think I’m letting you go into the city wearing a skirt that short?”he demands, glaring at me as he marches our way.
My heart is sinking as I sigh.“Papa…” For once, could he be normal?Then again, for him, this is normal, and that’s why I’m pretty much fucking terrified today.I’m going from an incredibly sheltered, private girls’ school where I wore a uniform every day and knew the other girls from preschool to my first classes at NYU.I’ll be surrounded by people my age who have actually been allowed to live life up to this point.
Meanwhile, here I am, never having gone to a party, never having thrown a party, even for my Sweet Sixteen.Things were too complicated at the time, being at war with the Vitali family and everything.Papa didn’t want to take any chances with who he invited and wouldn’t even approve a small dinner with a couple of the girls in my class.
“Caro mio.”Mama sighs, glancing at me, wearing an expression that tells me she’s on my side as she gently chides Papa.“She’s a young lady.Let her be a young lady.”
He hasn’t taken his eyes off me and now wags a finger in my face, making me shrink back a little.“I won’t have you taking risks with yourself and giving people the wrong idea about the kind of girl you are.”
My eyes almost fall out of my head when Dante steps between us with his hands raised.“Let’s not start another world war over this.She looks nice, and I’m sure she has enough on her mind today.You’re going to have to let go or at least loosen your grip.”
“Have a daughter of your own, then talk to me about loosening my grip,” Papa retorts.“Until then, you consult with me on business.You do not tell me how to parent my child.”
“Dear,” Mama croons, clicking her tongue.As usual, she has the power to drain the fight from him with a single word.The tension dissolves like a stiff breeze blew through.
When Papa’s shoulders sag, I know the battle is over.My breath catches when his eyes go soft.“My little girl.You’ll have to forgive me.I watched my son get married over the weekend, and now this.It’s a lot for a father to handle all at once.”
“I’ll be just fine.”I wish I felt a little more confident as I lean in to kiss his freshly shaved cheek.The scent of spicy aftershave clings to him like it always has.“I think I can handle myself.”
“Alessandro already has orders to bring you straight home after.”He notices me rolling my eyes, holding up a finger.His stern expression is back in place now.“None of that.This is my only request.I need to know you are safe, and he can keep you that way.”
“Oh, the irony,” Dante mutters, making Mama shush him.But I mean, he’s got a point.I don’t understand why somebody else can’t do it.Somebody I actually like, or at least can tolerate.With so many men around here, why does it have to behim?
I didn’t get a satisfying answer when I asked before, and I know better than to think I’ll get one now.Instead of bringing it up again, I take the opportunity to slip out now that everyone has said their peace.Sophia is out by the car, chatting with her brother, and they both look up as I start my descent.
Sophia claps and whistles, throwing her arms around me when I reach her.“Look at you!College girl,” she gushes.“Knock ’em dead.”
“Are you kidding?How could I knock ’em dead when I have to come home right after class?”Not like I expected any better, but still, I was hoping he wouldn’t be quite so demanding, especially on the first day.I’ve never been allowed into the city on my own, alone, before today.It’s a big deal for me, but it will have to be short-lived.
Then again, what am I saying?I won’t be alone.I’ll be in the company of the scowling, sullen-looking man who now holds open the back door of a black BMW.“Don’t want to be late for class,” he reminds me.How is it he always manages to sound annoyed, but like he’s laughing at me at the same time?
“Don’t worry about your papa.He’ll loosen up before long,” Sophia advises.Before I can get in the car, she leans in and adds in a whisper, “And don’t let my brother get to you, either.He’s just in a bad mood.Don’t be afraid to talk to people, make some friends.You’ll do great.”
I’m too overwhelmed at the way she cares to do more than nod with a lump in my throat before getting into the car.Alessandro doesn’t keep me waiting, climbing in behind the wheel and starting down the driveway while I take a few deep breaths.It’s going to be fine.I’m not missing out on anything.
“Turn on the stereo,” I call out once we come to a stop down at the gates, waiting for them to swing open.
He snorts.“Whatever happened to please?”
Oh, this is how it’s going to be?“I don’t know, maybe I’m allergic to politeness around certain people.But I want to pull up a playlist I made for today, all right?Don’t start things off on the wrong foot,” I add, stopping just short of threatening to tell Papa he’s being difficult.I don’t want to be that person, really, I don’t.But I will if he forces my hand.
